For Today: April 19th

For Today: April 19^th

Pride is the mask of one’s own faults.

Hebrew proverb

Pride was my protection; it kept me from seeing myself as I was. But my refusal to look at my defects also kept me from accepting myself.

Does pride still stand in the way of my recovery? Is there a righteousness in me that says, “Do it my way”? Today, I do not take credit for my abstinence. I do not criticize friends, colleagues, family members and fellow OAs for doing things differently from the way I do them. Today I see self-righteousness as a form of phony respectability---a wall behind which glaring defects can hide.

For Today: How grateful I am that OA give me the understanding and support I need to uncover my faults.

I think that pride DOES stand in my way, even now, after maintaining Abstinence for 3 years. I am a work in progress. I cannot change my old ideas & questionable behavior unless I recognize it. OA gives me the tools to do that: the 12 steps. Sometimes it can be difficult to pinpoint exactly WHAT emotions I’m feeling, or what character defects are surfacing. When I read program material & speak with other OAers is when I’m better able to recognize my faults.

But, when I ask God for help is when He guides me. All I need do is ask for answers and they come, sometimes swiftly, sometimes slowly,  always they come.

For today, I pray to shed my mask of pride & humble myself to accepting life on life's terms and accepting others as they are.