Saturday, October 8, 2011

For Today: October 8th



The man who acts the least, upbraids the most.
Homer

It is safer to criticize than to act.  Doing takes courage and self-confidence.

We are encouraged to become doers early in life.  When parents react positively to a child’s efforts, giving praise regardless of the outcome, that child will have the confidence to try again.  On the other hand, untempered  criticism is devastating to a child; it is that child who is likely to become the person who acts the least and upbraids the most.

The doers of the world are almost invariably people who as children were criticized as little as possible, and then only in a constructive manner, with parents and teachers offering suggestions in an easy, loving way that builds up rather than destroys self-esteem.

For Today:  I pray to be less critical and more helpful toward others, especially children.

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I have a tendency to be critical ALL the time, and I work on that character defect daily.  I was brought up to be critical...........to mistrust everyone, to find find fault everywhere, and to dwell in the negative instead of to focus on the positive.  I married a man who perpetuated that philosophy and stayed married to him for 22 years. 

UGH. It's taken a LOT of work and conscious effort to break OUT of that negative mindset, but I am doing it, one day at a time. I'm grateful that I did NOT bring my 2 children up that way: I never criticized them or told them they couldn't achieve their hopes and dreams. 

The criticisms I have are mostly about mySELF, I guess, although that negativity does extend to other people, places and things.  OA has taught me to concentrate on the positives and to be grateful for my blessings.  That every event in life IS a blessing to learn from, even the negative events.

I am a work in progress and for that, I am grateful to have found recovery.  One day at a time, I will stay the course and BECOME the kind of person I most admire. 

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