Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 31st


Life Is Worth Living


"These, then, are my last words to you:
Be not afraid of life.
Believe that life is worth living.
and your belief will help create the fact.
William James (1842 ~ 1910)

I have lived my life as a compulsive eater and I have known many other compulsive eaters. I believe I can say unequivocally that life is much more difficult in so many ways for us than for many others. I denied that what I suffered from was a disease; yet I watched as over the years it robbed me of so many things others take for granted. Most of us will acknowledge early on that the manifestations of compulsive eating affects us spiritually, emotionally and physically. Volumes have been written about each of these so most reading this know the devastation it causes. When I began to inventory my life and saw how much the quality of it had suffered, it saddened me greatly.

I believe one of the most difficult ways the disease of COE, or any compulsive illness, affects us is the way society looks upon us. Because I have experienced life both ways, I know how behavior and attitudes change in interacting with a COE vs a non-COE. We wear our disease on the outside ... but the extensive damage is far more wide-spread than just the physical. The disease wrecks havoc in every area of our lives as we silently go about our life doing the things expected of us. We don't dare scapegoat the disease. After all, this is not a cancer ... or heart disease. Yet it can be just as serious.

Many decades ago, a group of alcoholics gathered and, as a result, life began to change for those of us who struggled with the disease. When I reached the point in my life that I could actually acknowledge that compulsive eating was affecting it and that I had done everything possible to stop it and couldn't, it was one of the most freeing moments I've ever experienced. I learned that I was as powerless over this as I would have been suffering a heart attack. I also learned that I couldn't handle it alone. I learned that there were twelve steps that were absolutely necessary if I were to survive emotionally and, perhaps even physically.

I went from fighting the disease to acknowledging it. Because of the Steps I learned that there were tens of thousands of others exactly like me and that we all spoke the same beautiful language. I learned not to be afraid of life ... and that, despite this despicable disease, life is truly worth living. I was told to "act as if" and by doing this it became no longer an act.

One day at a time ...
I affirm that my life is worth living. One day at a time, I affirm that I will not be afraid of anything that makes me feel otherwise.

~ Mari

*********************************************


5 Years at GOAL! (Blog, 12/31/13)

Today is a great day because I celebrate 5 years at goal.  On December 31,2008, I reached goal after staying committed to the 5/1 for 29 weeks.  5 years ago today, I changed my life permanently.  I didn’t really KNOW at the time, that I’d changed my life permanently……….but today I know it for a fact.

The 5/1 enabled me to develop a solid routine with respect to eating meals on a regular schedule.  It trained me to view food as ‘fuel’ instead of entertainment, comfort, or relief from boredom.  For decades I was using food for all the wrong reasons, and as a result, I suffered from obesity.

When I took on the 5/1, I’d been researching lapband surgery, after yo yo dieting for 4 decades.  I’d lose a nice chunk of weight with a new diet, and then proceed to gain it ALL back in short order.  With a few extra pounds, just for fun.

An ad popped up onto my computer screen that day, and I learned about Medifast for the first time in my dieting career. Sheesh, at that point, I thought I’d tried EVERYTHING on the market.  But I hadn’t.  I never tried the 5/1, so I thought I’d give it a go.

I ordered 1 month’s worth of food and ‘tried’ the program for 1 week.  I wasn’t really ready to commit myself 100%, however, because I wasn’t willing to give up drinking at the time.  I managed to lose 5 lbs that first week, in spite of not staying 100% OP.

I realized that the 5/1 was not a program that I should be fiddling around with.  I realized I needed to commit myself 100% to the program, but the time wasn’t quite right.  So I put the boxes in the back of my pantry for one full year.

On June 10, 2008, I opened a box of clothing I’d purchased on EBay, for a Cancun vacation my DH and I were taking.  When I SAW how much fabric it took to cover my body, I was suddenly ‘ready’ to commit to the program that would ultimately change my life.  I was ready to wear a size Medium rather than a 2X or 3X.  I was also ready to stop drinking, permanently, because it was TIME.

I started the 5/1 the very next day, and put all of my tried-and-true excuses to sleep.  I would NOT drink nor would I go off plan for the duration of the weight loss journey. Period.  I didn’t care how ‘tempted’ I’d be, I didn’t care what anyone else had to say on the matter, either………all I DID care about was reaching goal AND keeping the weight off.  I had 100 lbs to lose and it felt overwhelming. So I set my ticker at 25 lb increments, and I immediately felt better. The ‘overwhelming’ journey ahead suddenly didn’t feel quite so overwhelming anymore.  All I had to do was stay the course, put one foot in front of the other, and DO IT, by God!

And that’s what I happened: I did it.  I lost 76 lbs in 29 weeks & reached my initial goal of 149 lbs.  When I got there, I still felt a bit chubby, especially in photos, and I would be damned if I worked THIS hard to STILL feel chubby!

So I went for another 10 lbs before I began Transition.  During the Transition period, I lost a few more pounds before beginning Maintenance, based on my calorie budget of 1,500 per day, and based on eating small, healthy meals at the same times I ate during 5/1.  I’d programmed my BODY to tell me when it was time to eat, and to quit feeding my MIND whenever I felt like it.  THIS was the key to long term weight management: feeding the BODY instead of the MIND.  Whether I ‘felt like it’ or not, I ate on schedule, and I still eat on schedule, 5 years later.

Everything in my life has changed for the better, now that I’m 100 lbs lighter than I was in 2008.  I am no longer self-conscious about how I look.  I can buy clothing anywhere on earth, in almost any store, without having to deal with Plus Sizes.  I can move around freely, cross my legs, and reach my feet in the shower.  I can embrace a new adventure without worrying if I’m too fat to actually accomplish the goal.  I allow people to take pictures of me nowadays, and that’s a BIG one………….because I’d forbid anyone to capture me on film when I was obese.  Who wanted to SEE my image in a picture? I mean, yes, I knew I was a large woman, but to SEE it on a photo was another story.

The 5/1 was the tool I used to help me change my life.  I often refer to MF as Miracle Food, but I did the hard work involved in creating the miracle.  I allowed myself NO excuses, no ‘outs’, no ‘just this once’s’.  I stuck to my Food Plan like glue during the 5/1, and honestly, I stick to my Maintenance Food Plan like glue now.

There is no ‘easy’ way, unfortunately.  The TV ads promise us weight loss like ‘magic’ if we purchase this pill or that product.  There IS no magic.  There is only hard work and self-discipline.  And the 5/1 is THE program to GIVE you the self-discipline you’ve probably lacked.

I’d like to say that the past 5 years of weight management have been a breeze, but they haven’t. It took me a full year to develop a Food Plan that was manageable and that I could TRUST without weighing myself every day.  In year 4, I struggled with a 15 lb gain, the first significant change in my weight since I first began this journey.  I re-committed to the 5/1, and to total abstinence from sugar, and I lost the excess weight, thank God.  For me, sugar is something I cannot deal with, period………so I don’t. It took me 4 years to arrive at that conclusion, however, and I did have my share of struggles until I finally reached the point of Acceptance.

The key to success here is different for everyone, I suppose. I’m sharing MY journey and what its taken for ME to arrive at a place of peace & serenity with food.  I don’t know what it will take for YOU to reach YOUR happy place, but I DO know this: Staying committed to the program entirely WILL help you tremendously.

If I can do this, YOU can do this.  You CAN change your life, one packet at a time, one day at a time.  Once you commit to staying OP all the time, no matter WHAT, the ROUTINE takes over.  This is what gets you to goal: the familiarity of the routine.  You replace your old, bad eating habits with new, healthy eating habits.  It becomes totally normal to eat 6 small, healthy meals a day in Maintenance, just as you did during 5/1.


Today, December 31, 2013, is a huge milestone for me. I've been sober for 5 1/2 years now, having had NO alcohol since June 10, 2008.  Not only did the 5/1 help me lose a whole lot of body fat, it  helped me get and stay sober as well.  My life is no longer devoted to food OR booze, thank God, and for that I am eternally grateful.  I don't take my recovery lightly, either, because I KNOW I'm always one bite or one sip away from disaster.  But, for today, my program is solid and I'm choosing to keep it that way.

Wishing you all a blessed & peaceful 2014. Press on, my friends, and MAKE your dreams come true this year!

Monday, December 30, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 30th



WILLINGNESS

Yet we finally did make choices that brought about our recovery. We came to believe that alone we were powerless over [food]. This was surely a choice, and a most difficult one. We came to believe that a Higher Power could restore us to sanity when we became willing to practice [program's] twelve steps. In short, we chose to 'become willing,' and no better choice did we ever make."

from "As Bill Sees It"



I floundered in program for a good while. I was not willing to do the Fourth Step; it scared me. Then I did it, and recovery continued.

I floundered in program again. I was not willing to do the extra work I knew I would have to do to stay in the program. I was scared of being a sponsor, so I left. The disease gradually took me over.

I came back to program. This time I was willing. No longer did the phrase "going to any lengths" scare me. I knew I needed to do whatever it took. The disease had beaten me down to where I had no choice if I wanted to recover. I took the steps ... all the steps. I became a sponsor. I also discovered that abstinence is only the beginning of recovery - that life is joyful and free. It all began with willingness on my part. I didn't have the power to change my life, but my Higher Power was able to change it once I became willing to follow the Twelve Steps to the best of my ability.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will ask for and receive the willingness to work this program.


~ Julie ~

 ***************************************

Each Day a New Beginning
And what a delight it is to make friends with someone you have despised!
  —Colette


What does it mean to say we "despise" someone? Usually it means that we have invested a lot of energy in negative feelings; it means that we have let ourselves care deeply about someone. We would never say we "despised" someone who wasn't important to us. Why have we chosen to let negative feelings occupy so much of our hearts?

Sometimes, in the past, that negative energy has become almost an obsession, consuming our time, gnawing at our self-esteem. But in recovery there comes a moment of lightning change; a moment of release from the bonds of obsession. The other person is, after all, just another person--a seeker, like ourselves. And, since we cared enough to devote our time and energies to disliking her, she is probably someone who would be rewarding to know.

Recovery has given us the opportunity to turn over many negative feelings, to discover that "friend" and "enemy" can be two sides of the same person.

Today, I will look into my heart and see whether I am clinging to obsessive concerns with other people. I will resolve to let them go. 

From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. 

**********************************************

 
Food for Thought
Fear of Failure

It is often the fear of failure, which prevents us from attempting what we really want to do. When we are new to OA, we may be reluctant to commit ourselves to abstinence because we fear we will break it. When we are able to maintain abstinence from compulsive overeating, we may be afraid to make some other kind of commitment for fear of not being able to succeed.

Our past failures can undermine our confidence in our present abilities. For this reason, we need to let go of the past and be willing to try something new. For many of us, belief in a Higher Power is a new commitment. The fear that we will be disappointed sometimes blocks us from the wholehearted trust that such a commitment entails.

The fear of failure is best dealt with by living one day at a time. We can risk a small failure today; it is the large failure in the future that terrifies us. By taking a small step today toward maintaining abstinence or working on an important project, we build the confidence that we can eventually succeed.

With Your support, may I be willing to risk failure. 

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation

*******************************************

 

The Language of Letting Go
Laying the Foundation

The groundwork has been laid.

Do you not see that?

Don't you understand that all you have gone through was for a purpose?

There was a reason, a good reason, for the waiting, the struggle, the pain, and finally the release.

You have been prepared. The same way a builder must first tear down and dig out the old to make way for the new, your Higher Power has been cleaning out the foundation in your life.

Have you ever watched a builder at construction? When he begins his work, it looks worse than before he began. What is old and decayed must be removed. What is insufficient or too weak to support the new structure must be removed, replaced, or reinforced. No builder who cares about his or her work would put a new surface over an insufficient support system. The foundation would give way. It would not last.

If the finished product is to be what is desired, the work must be done thoroughly from the bottom up. As the work progresses, it often appears to be an upheaval. Often, it does not seem to make sense. It may appear to be wasted time and effort, because we cannot see the final product yet.

But it is so important that the foundation be laid properly if the fun work, the finishing touches, is to be all that we want it to be.

This long, hard time in your life has been for laying of groundwork. It was not without purpose, although at times the purpose may not have been evident or apparent.

Now, the foundation has been laid. The structure is solid.

Now, it is time for the finishing touches, the completion.

It is time to move the furniture in and enjoy the fruits of the labor.

Congratulations. You have had the patience to endure the hard parts. You have trusted, surrendered, and allowed your Higher Power and the Universe to heal and prepare you.

Now, you shall enjoy the good that has been planned.

Now, you shall see the purpose.

Now, it shall all come together and make sense.

Enjoy.

Today, I will surrender to the laying of the foundation - the groundwork - in my life. If it is time to enjoy the placement of the finishing touches, I will surrender to that, and enjoy that too. I will remember to be grateful for a Higher Power that is a Master Builder and only has my best interests in mind, creating and constructing my life. I will be grateful for my Higher Power's care and attention to details in laying the foundation - even though I become impatient at times. I will stand in awe at the beauty of God's finished product. 

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.

Sunday, December 29, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 29th


~GRATITUDE FOR ADVERSITY ~

He was my greatest teacher.
He taught me patience.

The Dalai Lama on Mao Tse Tung



        Whenever I feel downtrodden or disappointed by the hand that life has dealt me, I often think of this quote. It moves me beyond speech. Here was a man who had lost his homeland to communist China, yet he still had a good thing to say about the man who started it all. It forces me to come to a realization that what has happened to me is peanuts!

        Too often I am caught up with feeling sorry for myself because of my disease, while ignoring the fact that I am so fortunate to have found recovery. Sometimes I feel so poor, yet I live in a large home with a wonderful spouse and delightful pets. I have a car, and enough food to eat every day. I have the luxury of obtaining my degree. Most of all, though I often complain about how unfair it all is, I am even fortunate to have an eating disorder. Because it is through admitting I have a problem that I am beginning to taste recovery, and it is sweeter than any binge item. And it has taught me that it is through our adversities that we learn compassion and patience.

        I have to realize that life just isn't fair. If it were, how boring it would be! Nothing worthwhile is easy to obtain, and that includes recovery. What would it be worth if there was no effort going into it? Sometimes bad things happen, and they are unfortunate. But that's the end of it. I cannot make things be the way I want them to be. I cannot change life. I must accept life on life's terms, and learn the art of patience, so well demonstrated by the above quote. How fortunate that I have the opportunity to learn these precious skills in the safety and security of my own home, with my wonderful friends, spouse, and my program family!

        One Day at a Time . . .
        I will avoid dwelling on the misery that accompanies hardship. I will develop the willingness to be grateful for the opportunity for me to learn compassion and patience.

        Claire

****************************************

Each Day a New Beginning
Kindness and intelligence don't always deliver us from the pitfalls and traps. There is no way to take the danger out of human relationships.
  —Barbara Grizzuti Harrison


Relationships with other people are necessary to escape loneliness; however, relationships do not guarantee freedom from pain. Nurturing a meaningful relationship with another human being takes patience, even when we don't have any. It takes tolerance, even if we don't feel it. It takes selflessness, at those very moments our own ego is crying for attention.

Yet, we need relationships with others; they inspire us. We learn who we are and who we can become through relationships. They precipitate our accomplishments. Our creativity is encouraged by them, and so is our emotional and spiritual development.

We can look around us, attentively. We can feel blessed, even when it's a negative situation. Every situation is capable of inspiring a positive step forward. Every situation is meant for our good.

There's risk in human relationships, and it's often accompanied by pain. But I am guaranteed growth, and I will find the happiness I seek. I will reach out to someone today. 

From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. 

*****************************************************

 
Food for Thought
Working Compulsively

We do not want to turn from compulsive overeating to compulsive working. This, too, is an attempt to escape reality. Compulsive working holds a particular danger for us, since when we allow ourselves to get overtired, we run the risk of breaking our abstinence.

Working compulsively includes the fear that what we do will not be good enough. It is when we are unsure of our self worth that we have to continually prove how much we can accomplish. Compulsive work is also a way to avoid meaningful relationships with family and friends. If we fear intimacy and exposure, we sometimes try to hide behind a facade of busyness.

When God controls our will and our lives, we work according to His direction. We have the faith that what we do will be acceptable and enough. Believing that God cares for us, we do not rely only on our own abilities. Working for a Higher Power means that we work with serenity and confidence, knowing that He directs and sustains our efforts.

Teach me how to work productively for You. 

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation. 

*******************************************************

 
The Language of Letting Go
Moving On

Learn the art of acceptance. It's a lot of grief.
  —Codependent No More


Sometimes, as part of taking care of ourselves, it becomes time to end certain relationships. Sometimes, it comes time to change the parameters of a particular relationship.

This is true in love, in friendships, with family, and on the job.

Endings and changes in relationships are not easy. But often, they are necessary.

Sometimes, we linger in relationships that are dead, out of fear of being alone or to postpone the inevitable grieving process that accompanies endings. Sometimes, we need to linger for a while, to prepare ourselves, to get strong and ready enough to handle the change.

If that is what we are doing, we can be gentle with ourselves. It is better to wait until that moment when it feels solid, clear, and consistent to act.

We will know. We will know. We can trust ourselves.

Knowing that a relationship is changing or is about to end is a difficult place to be in, especially when it is not yet time to act but we know the time is drawing near. It can be awkward and uncomfortable, as the lesson draws to a close. We may become impatient to put closure on it, but not yet feel empowered to do that. That's okay. The time is not yet right. Something important is still happening. When the time is right, we can trust that it will happen. We will receive the power and the ability to do what we need to do.

Ending relationships or changing the boundaries of a particular relationship is not easy. It requires courage and faith. It requires a willingness on our part to take care of ourselves and, sometimes, to stand-alone for a while.

Let go of fear. Understand that change is an important part of recovery. Love yourself enough to do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and find enough confidence to believe that you will love again.

We are never starting over. In recovery, we are moving forward in a perfectly planned progression of lessons. We will find ourselves with certain people - in love, family, friendships, and work - when we need to be with them. When the lesson has been mastered, we will move on. We will find ourselves in a new place, learning new lessons, with new people.

No, the lessons are not all painful. We will arrive at that place where we can learn, not from pain, but from joy and love.

Our needs will get met.

Today, I will accept where I am in my relationships, even if that place is awkward and uncomfortable. If I am in the midst of endings, I will face and accept my grief. God, help me trust that the path I am on has been perfectly and lovingly planned for me. Help me believe that my relationships are teaching me important lessons. Help me accept and be grateful for middles, endings, and new beginnings. 


From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation

Saturday, December 28, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 28th



~MEDITATION~

God is the mirror of silence
in which all creation is reflected.

Paramahansa Yogananda



The disease of compulsive overeating is a devious one. It tries to tell me that I'm not a worthwhile person. It tries to tell me that I'm never going to recover, so I may as well eat. The disease tries to make me feel like I'm the lowest of the low.

Fortunately, there are many things in this recovery program that counteract the disease. I can use a food plan to make sure I don't eat what I'm not supposed to eat. I can read program literature to show me how to live triumphantly. I can work the Steps, do service, make outreach calls; there's so much I can do which can bring recovery from compulsive overeating.

Another of the things I can do to counteract my disease is meditation. When I meditate, I come into conscious contact with my Higher Power. Meditation helps me to see that I am a worthwhile person, that God loves me just as I am. When I meditate I gain insights into the program literature I'm reading, I learn the things I need to do to further my recovery. I also learn the things that stifle my growth, so I can stop doing them. Meditation is very important to my recovery program.

One Day at a Time . . .
I remember the importance of meditation, and I meditate every day.


Jeff

***********************************************

Each Day a New Beginning

The human heart dares not stay away too long from that which hurt it most. There is a return journey to anguish that few of us are released from making.
—Lillian Smith

As the sore tooth draws our tongue, so do rejections, affronts, painful criticisms, both past and present draw our minds. We court self-pity, both loving and hating it. But we can change this pattern. First we must decide we are ready to do so. The program tells us we must become "entirely ready." And then we must ask to have this shortcoming removed.

The desire to dwell on the injustices of our lives becomes habitual. It takes hours of our time. It influences our perceptions of all other experiences. We have to be willing to replace that time-consuming activity with one that's good and healthy.

We must be prepared for all of life to change. Our overriding self-pity has so tarnished our perceptions that we may never have sensed all the good that life daily offers. How often we see the glass as half-empty rather than half-full!

A new set of experiences awaits me today. And I can perceive them unfettered by the memories of the painful past. Self-pity need not cage me, today.

From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. 

***********************************************

Food for Thought

Minimizing Temptation

There are things we can do to minimize the temptations that are around us. We are constantly exposed to food advertisements if we watch television and read magazines. Most of us need to spend a certain amount of time purchasing and preparing food. Social gatherings usually involve refreshments. All of this exposure to food can be uncomfortable for compulsive overeaters if we do not find ways to minimize it.

It is a good idea to skip the recipe sections in the magazines we read. Unnecessary thinking about food only intensifies our obsession. Moving away from the television set during a food commercial is a way to minimize that kind of temptation. Grocery shopping is expedited by not considering any items other than those on a prepared list and by spending as little time as possible in the grocery store. Meal preparation can be simplified so that less rather than more time is spent in the kitchen. At parties, we can concentrate on people and conversation instead of food.

The best way to handle temptation is by remembering that we are compulsive overeaters and that nothing is worth activating our disease.

Guide us as we avoid temptation.

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.

********************************************


The Language of Letting Go
Panic

Don't panic!

If panic strikes, we do not have to allow it to control our behaviors. Behaviors controlled by panic tend to be self-defeating. No matter what the situation or circumstance, panic is usually not a good foundation. No matter what the situation or circumstance, we usually have at least a moment to breathe deeply and restore our serenity and peace.

We don't have to do more than we can reasonably do - ever! We don't have to do something we absolutely cannot do or cannot learn to do!

This program, this healthy way of life we are seeking, is built on a foundation of peace and quiet confidence - in ourselves, in our Higher Power, in the recovery process.

Do not panic. That takes us away from the path. Relax. Breathe deeply. Let peace flow through our body and mind. From this base, our Source shall supply the necessary resources.

Today, I will treat panic as a separate issue that needs immediate attention. I will refuse to allow panicky thoughts and feelings to motivate me. Instead, I will let peace and trust motivate my feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. 

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation

Friday, December 27, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 27th



~ JOY~

Life is no brief candle to me.
It is a sort of splendid torch which
I have got hold of for the moment, and
want to make it burn as brightly as possible
before handing it on to future generations.

George Bernard Shaw



For many years my life was filled with pain and I felt totally empty inside. I did what I had to do for my children and for the people around me, but with a heavy heart, and life seemed to be one endless day after the other. What had happened to all the dreams and hopes I had for a life filled with joy and happiness? Sometimes the pain got to be so great that life just didn't seem to be worthwhile any more. At times I even contemplated ending my life. I have often heard it said that the opposite of pain is joy but in those dark days, I certainly couldn't see that.

It is only in recovery that I see that the pain had a meaning, and it has brought me to a great appreciation of all the miracles in my life. I can appreciate the beauty in nature, and for the first time in a very long time my soul is filled with joy. When I listen to Beethoven's glorious Ninth Symphony with its last movement, the choral piece set to the poet Schiller's "Ode to Joy", I begin to realize that one can create something truly wondrous out of one's pain and suffering. Beethoven wrote this magnificent work shortly before his death, when he was in tremendous emotional pain and totally deaf. Yet he created this truly amazing piece of music that lives on nearly 200 years after his death, and will probably do so for many years to come.

I now realize that there was a reason for my suffering and if, out of that, I can bring some joy or happiness to others, then my life will have had some purpose. It is only through this fellowship that I have been able to see that.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will always remember that my pain has been a growing experience that enables me to share what I have learned with other fellow sufferers. I can now appreciate all the miracles that my Higher Power performs in my life, and I am now truly able to experience joy.


Sharon S.

**********************************************************

Each Day a New Beginning
One needs something to believe in, something for which one can have wholehearted enthusiasm.
  —Hannah Senesh


Life offers little, if we sit passively in the midst of activity. Involvement is a prerequisite if we are to grow. For our lives' purposes we need enthusiasm; we need enthusiasm in order to greet the day expectantly. When we look toward the day with anticipation, we are open to all the possibilities for action.

We must respond to our possibilities if we are to mature emotionally and recover spiritually. Idly observing life from the sidelines guarantees no development beyond our present level. We begin to change once we start living up to our commitment to the program, its possibilities and our purpose, and it's that change, many days over, that moves us beyond the negative, passive outlook of days gone by.

The program has offered us something to believe in. We are no longer the women we were. So much more have we become! Each day's worth of recovery carries us closer to fulfilling our purpose in life.

I believe in recovery, my own; when I believe in success, I'll find it. There is magic in believing.

From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.

****************************************************

 
Food for Thought
Courage

We pray for the courage to change the things we can. We cannot change the fact that we are compulsive overeaters, but we can change our actions so that we are not destroyed by our disease. Making changes requires the courage to start out on a new, unknown course. Courage does not mean the elimination of fear. Courage means acting in spite of the fact that we are afraid.

It takes courage to learn to affirm one's rights as an individual, especially if the old way was to say yes to all demands and requests, reasonable and unreasonable. It takes courage to face the truth instead of continuing to live with comfortable illusions. Courage is necessary for working the steps of the OA program.

Sometimes courage comes when we are pressed to a wall of failure. There is nothing to do but turn around and step out in a new direction, even though we are afraid. The courage born of desperation can produce remarkable results.

Grant us the courage to move in Your direction. 

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.

**************************************************

 
The Language of Letting Go
Near the Top

I know you're tired. I know you feel overwhelmed. You may feel as though this crisis, this problem, this hard time will last forever.

It won't. You are almost through.

You don't just think it has been hard; it has been hard. You have been tested, tried, and retested on what you have learned.

Your beliefs and your faith have been tried in fire. You have believed, then doubted, then worked at believing some more. You have had to have faith even when you could not see or imagine what you were asked to believe. Others around you may have tried to convince you not to believe in what you were hoping you could believe.

You have had opposition. You have not gotten to this place with total support and joy. You have had to work hard, in spite of what was happening around you. Sometimes, what motivated you was anger; sometimes fear.

Things went wrong - more problems occurred than you anticipated. There were obstacles, frustrations, and annoyances en route. You did not plan on this being the way it would evolve. Much of this has been a surprise; some of it has not been at all what you desired.

Yet, it has been good. Part of you, the deepest part that knows truth, has sensed this all along, even when your head told you that things were out of whack and crazy; that there was no plan or purpose, that God had forgotten you.

So much has happened, and each incident - the most painful, the most troubling, and the most surprising - has a connection. You are beginning to see and sense that.

You never dreamt things would happen this way, did you? But they did. Now you are learning the secret - they were meant to happen this way, and this way is good, better than what you expected.

You didn't believe it would take this long, either - did you? But it did. You have learned patience.

You never thought you could have it, but now you know you do.

You have been led. Many were the moments when you thought you were forgotten, when you were convinced you had been abandoned. Now you know you have been guided.

Now things are coming into place. You are almost at the end of this phase, this difficult portion of the journey. The lesson is almost complete. You know - the lesson you fought, resisted, and insisted you could not learn. Yes, that one. You have almost mastered it.

You have been changed from the inside out. You have been moved to a different level, a higher level, a better level.

You have been climbing a mountain. It has not been easy, but mountain climbing is never easy. Now, you are near the top. A moment longer, and the victory shall be yours.

Steady your shoulders. Breathe deeply. Move forward in confidence and peace. The time is coming to relish and enjoy all, which you have fought for. That time is drawing near, finally.

I know you have thought before that the time was drawing near, only to learn that it wasn't. But now, the reward is coming. You know that too. You can feel it.

Your struggle has not been in vain. For every struggle on this journey, there is a climax, a resolution.

Peace, joy, abundant blessings, and reward are yours here on earth. Enjoy.

There will be more mountains, but now you know how to climb them. And you have learned the secret of what is at the top.

Today, I will accept where I am and continue pushing forward. If I am in the midst of a learning experience, I will allow myself to continue on with the faith that the day of mastery and reward will come. Help me, God; understand that despite my best efforts to live in peaceful serenity, there are times of mountain climbing. Help me stop creating chaos and crisis, and help me meet the challenges that will move me upward and forward. 

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 26th


~VISION~

A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile
the moment a single man contemplates it,
bearing within him the image of a cathedral.

Antoine De Saint-Exupery



It never ceases to amaze me how the disease of compulsive overeating distorts the vision. Some compulsive overeaters can look into a mirror and see a fat person where there is none. Others can look into the same mirror and not see the weight that is there.

Recovery brings new eyes to the compulsive overeater. It lets us to see what's really there in the mirror. Recovery allows each of us to see the cathedral we really are, rather than the pile of rubble we think we see. Recovery corrects our vision.

One Day at a Time . . .
As I work my recovery program, I will see myself as I really am, rather than seeing what the disease shows me.

Jeff

***************************************
Each Day a New Beginning
It is only framed in space that beauty blooms; only in space are events, and objects and people unique and significant and therefore beautiful.
  —Anne Morrow Lindbergh


We must look closely; focus intently on the subjects of our attention. Within these subjects is the explanation of life's mysteries. To observe anything closely means we must pull it aside with our minds and fondle it, perhaps. We must let the richness of the object, the person, and the event, wash over us and savor its memory.

Many of us only now are able to look around ourselves slowly, with care, noting the detail, the brilliant color of life. Each day is an opportunity to observe and absorb the beauty while it blooms.

I will look for beauty today, in myself, and in a friend, and I will find it. 

From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. 

*******************************************


Food for Thought
Control

Control was something we either feared or did not know much about before we began the OA program. We resisted control as being opposed to our idea of spontaneous living, especially spontaneous eating, Control was for other people - our children perhaps - but not for us.

Without control, we watched as self-will ran riot with our lives. We ate what we pleased, and then, angry and depressed, we said what we pleased and did what we pleased. The problem was that we ended up being not at all "pleased," but full of disgust and despair. Dimly, we may have realized that our suffering was due to lack of self-control, but we did not know how to go about acquiring what we lacked.

By relinquishing our so-called control to a Higher Power, we learn what it means to be free. By using the OA concept of abstinence to control our eating, we find spontaneity in living. Rather than inhibiting us, the kind of control we develop through this program liberates us from the bondage of self-will.

Control my life, I pray. 

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation

********************************************

 
The Language of Letting Go
Growth

Just as when we were children and grew out of favorite toys and clothes, we sometimes grow out of things as adults - people, jobs, and homes. This can be confusing. We may wonder why someone or something that was so special and important to us last year doesn't fit the same way in our life today. We may wonder why our feelings have changed.

When we were children, we may have tried to fit an outgrown article of clothing on to our body. Now, as adults, we may go through a time of trying to force fit attitudes that we have outgrown. We may need to do this to give ourselves time to realize the truth. What worked last year, what was so important and special to us in times past, doesn't work anymore because we've changed. We've grown.

We can accept this as a valid and important part of recovery. We can let ourselves go through experimentation and grief as we struggle to make something fit, trying to figure out if indeed it no longer fits, and why. We can explore our feelings and thoughts around what has happened.

Then, we can put last year's toys away and make room for the new.

Today, I will let last year's toys be what they were: last year's toys. I will remember them with fondness for the part they played in my life. Then, I will put them away and make room for the new.

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
 

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 25th



HOLIDAYS

May peace be more than a holiday;
May love be more than a season;
May the feelings deep inside transcend the calendar;
And, instead, become a way of life.

Anonymous


It is the time of Hanukkah ... of Christmas ... of Kwanzaa ... and other holidays. It is the time when the world is at its best and the hearts of all seem to be brimming with love.

It is also the time of year that my very soul finds the most difficult. My physical and emotional recovery is compromised, and memories occupy every cell in my body, causing this vulnerable addict tremendous turmoil.

These holy days test the gifts of that enigma which is my Higher Power ... the God Of My Understanding ... and when these days are over and normality returns, I smile at having once again made it through the holidays intact.

One Day at a Time . . .
I acknowledge that in my Higher Power
I have a love that can never be fathomed,
A spiritual resource that can never be exhausted,
A peace that can never be understood,
A rest that can never be disturbed,
A joy that can never be diminished,
A hope that can never be disappointed,
A glory that can never be clouded,
A light that can never be darkened,
And a life that can never die ...
Even on holidays.

~ Mari ~

***************************************************

 Each Day a New Beginning

What we suffer, what we endure . . is done by us, as individuals, in private.
—Louise Bogan


Empathy we can give. Empathy we can find, and it comforts. But our pain, the depth of it, can never be wholly shared, fully understood, actually realized by anyone other than ourselves. Alone, each of us comes to terms with our grief, our despair, even our guilt.

Knowing that we are not alone in what we suffer, makes the difficulties each of us must face easier. We haven't been singled out, of that we're certain. Remembering that our challenges offer us the lessons we need in the school of life makes them more acceptable. In time, as our recovery progresses, we'll even look eagerly to our challenges as the real exciting opportunities for which we've been created.

Suffering prompts the changes necessary for spiritual growth. It pushes us like no other experience to God--for understanding, for relief, for unwavering security. It's not easy to look upon suffering as a gift. And we need not fully understand it; however, in time, its value in our lives will become clear.

I will not be wary of the challenges today. I will celebrate their part of my growth. 

************************************************

 
Food for Thought

Confidence

Our biggest problem was the inability to stop eating compulsively and the resultant obesity. This problem is never solved permanently, but it is overcome on a day-to-day basis. As we succeed in abstaining from compulsive overeating, we grow in confidence. Since by working the program we solve our biggest problem every day, we become confident that we can solve other problems as well.

Confidence is trust that our Higher Power and OA will not let us down. Confidence is the knowledge that however tough life gets, we have tools and resources for dealing with it. Confidence believes in ourselves as children of God and people of value. Confidence is the willingness to give what we have, with the faith that our gifts are needed and acceptable.

When we have confidence in our Higher Power and in ourselves, we are willing to try even though we may fail. If we fail, we are willing to try again. Since our will and our lives are turned over to God, as we understand Him, we have confidence that everything eventually works out for good.

You are the source of confidence. 


***********************************************

 
The Language of Letting Go

The Holidays

Sometimes, the holidays are filled with the joy we associate with that time of year. The season flows. Magic is in the air.

Sometimes, the holidays can be difficult and lonely.

Here are some ideas I've learned through personal experience, and practice, to help us get through difficult holidays:

Deal with feelings, but try not to dwell unduly on them. Put the holidays in perspective: A holiday is one day out of 365. We can get through any 24-hour period.

Get through the day, but be aware that there may be a post-holiday backlash. Sometimes, if we use our survival behaviors to get through the day, the feelings will catch up to us the next day. Deal with them too. Get back on track as quickly as possible.

Find and cherish the love that's available, even if it's not exactly what we want. Is there someone we can give love to and receive love from? Recovering friends? Is there a family who would enjoy sharing their holiday with us? Don't be a martyr - go. There may be those who would appreciate our offer to share our day with them.

We are not in the minority if we find ourselves experiencing a less than ideal holiday. How easy, but untrue, to tell ourselves the rest of the world is experiencing the perfect holiday, and we're alone in conflict.

We can create our own holiday agenda. Buy yourself a present. Find someone to whom you can give. Unleash your loving, nurturing self and give in to the holiday spirit.

Maybe past holidays haven't been terrific. Maybe this year wasn't terrific. But next year can be better, and the next a little better. Work toward a better life - one that meets your needs. Before long, you'll have it.

God, help me enjoy and cherish this holiday. If my situation is less than ideal, help me take what's good and let go of the rest.

*********************************

MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone!

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 24th


REGRET

“Regret is an appalling waste of energy;
you can't build on it;
it’s only good for wallowing in.”

Katherine Mansfield


Before I came into the program, I allowed fear to rule my life and prevent me from trying new things. I was absent from my own life. I was emotionally unavailable to my children and I stayed stuck in a deep hole of self-pity. I never really heard beautiful music or gloried in the miracles of nature. Although I had what people might perceive as a pretty normal life, it was actually an empty shell and I merely existed. I feel so saddened now at the thought of all the wasted years. I cannot bring them back, but I can learn from them.

When I came into the program and read the Promises in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, I realized that it was futile to regret the past or to shut the door on it. Those years and all the pain I went through are what made me the person I am today. I need to always remember where I came from, because if I don't, I can just as easily go back there. I can also use my experience to help others on this wonderful road to recovery. I am able to give away what has been given to me so freely, because it’s only then that I can keep what I have.

One Day at a Time . . .
I must always remember where I came from so that I can help others in this program of recovery and keep myself from going back into the patterns of my past.

Sharon S.

*****************************************

Each Day a New Beginning

Follow your dream . .
if you stumble, don't stop
and lose sight of your goal,
press on to the top.
For only on top
Can we see the whole view . . .
—Amanda Bradley


Today, we can, each of us, look back on our lives and get a glimmering of why something happened and how it fit into the larger mosaic of our lives. And this will continue to be true for us. We have stumbled. We will stumble. And we learn about ourselves, about what makes us stumble and about the methods of picking ourselves up.

Life is a process, a learning process that needs those stumbles to increase our awareness of the steps we need to take to find our dream at the top. None of us could realize the part our stumbling played in the past. But now we see. When we fall, we need to trust that, as before, our falls are "up," not down.

I will see the whole view in time. I see part of it daily. My mosaic is right and good and needs my stumbles.


From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. 

******************************************

Food for Thought

Thinking Straight

Before we found this program, we did a great deal of thinking in circles. Since we did not know how to stop eating compulsively, we spent a lot of time thinking up reasons for our behavior, making plans for change, and rationalizing another day's failure to eat normally. Our thinking often wandered away into fantasy, spinning dreams of when we would be thin and on top of things. Since we had to have reasons for our inability to make the dreams materialize, we blamed our failure on the people around us. "If they were only more loving, considerate, capable, exciting, smarter..."

Such circular thinking got us nowhere. The more we fantasized, the more we ate, and the more we ate, the more we withdrew from reality.

When our minds are not muddled by too much food, our thinking is clarified. The Twelve Steps put us on the road to responsible action, rather than irresponsible rationalization. Accepting the fact that we have a disease keeps us in the world of reality instead of a fantasyland.

With Your truth, keep my thinking straight

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation

***********************************************

The Language of Letting Go
Getting Through the Holidays

For some, the sights, signs, and smells of the holidays bring joy and a warm feeling. But, while others are joyously diving into the season, some of us are dipping into conflict, guilt, and a sense of loss.

We read articles on how to enjoy the holidays, we read about the Christmas blues, but many of us still can't figure out how to get through the holiday season. We may not know what a joyous holiday would look and feel like.

Many of us are torn between what we want to do on the holiday, and what we feel we have to do. We may feel guilty because we don't want to be with our families. We may feel a sense of loss because we don't have the kind of family to be with that we want. Many of us, year after year, walk into the same dining room on the same holiday, expecting this year to be different. Then we leave, year after year, feeling let down, disappointed, and confused by it all.

Many of us have old, painful memories triggered by the holidays.

Many of us feel a great deal of relief when the holiday is ended.

One of the greatest gifts of recovery is learning that we are not alone. There are probably as many of us in conflict during the holidays than there are those who feel at peace. We're learning, through trial and error, how to take care of ourselves a little better each holiday season.

Our first recovery task during the holidays is to accept ourselves, our situation, and our feelings about our situation. We accept our guilt, anger, and sense of loss. It's all okay.

There is no right or perfect way to handle the holidays. Our strength can be found in doing the best we can, one year at a time.

This holiday season, I will give myself permission to take care of myself. 

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation

Monday, December 23, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 23rd


~ FEAR ~

When thinking won't cure fear, action will.

W. Clement Stone


When I first came into the program, I was told that I couldn't think my way into positive actions, but I could act my way into positive thinking. I learned that this was a simple program of action; that if I wanted what you had, I had to do what you did. None of these clich├ęs made any sense to me; I would have to think these over. The nerve of these people telling me that they would do my thinking for me, that all I had to do was follow directions! They prodded and badgered me into working the Steps out of real love and knowledge of truth. I realize now that my actions demonstrated to God my desire to change, and He gave me the courage to try living another way. Most importantly, though, He gave me you.

One Day at a Time . . .
Am I going to "keep on the firing line" or rest on my laurels?

Jeremiah

***********************************************

Each Day a New Beginning

. . . The present enshrines the past.
—Simone de Beauvoir


Each of our lives is a multitude of interconnecting pieces, not unlike a mosaic. What has gone before, what will come today, are at once and always entwined. The past has done its part, never to be erased. The present is always a composite.

In months and years gone by, perhaps we anticipated the days with dread. Fearing the worst, often we found it; we generally find that which we fear. But we can influence the mosaic our experiences create. The contribution today makes to our mosaic can lighten its shade, can heighten its contrast, and can make bold its design.

What faces us today? A job we enjoy or one we fear? Growing pains of our children? Loneliness? How we move through the minutes, the hours, influences our perception of future minutes and hours.

No moment is inviolate. Every moment is part of the whole that we are creating. We are artists. We create our present from influences of our past.

I will go forth today; I will anticipate goodness. I will create the kind of moments that will add beauty to my mosaic.

From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation 

******************************************

Food for Thought
Warning: Danger Ahead

After we have lived the OA program for a time, it becomes a part of our deepest self. When a thought or impulse arises which threatens our program, we often feel a twinge of fear at the same time. This feeling of fear is a warning that whatever we are contemplating may be hazardous to our health.

Not to heed these warning signals is the height of folly. We have learned from sad experience that certain thoughts and actions are not for us, if we want to maintain our abstinence and our sanity. When confronted with a difficult choice, we need to listen carefully for the small voice of conscience, which warns us of disaster ahead if we choose foolishly.

Our Higher Power never allows us to be tempted beyond our ability to withstand the temptation, provided we recognize our need for His saving strength. By paying attention to the small warning twinges of fear, we can avoid thoughts and actions, which go against His, will for us.

May I heed the danger signals You send. 


From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.

**************************************************

 The Language of Letting Go

Holiday Triggers

One year, when I was a child, my father got drunk and violent at Christmas. I had just unwrapped a present, a bottle of hand lotion, when he exploded in an alcoholic rage. Our Christmas was disrupted. It was terrible. It was frightening for the whole family. Now, thirty-five years later, whenever I smell hand lotion, I immediately feel all the feelings I did that Christmas: the fear, the disappointment, the heartache, the helplessness, and an instinctive desire to control.
—Anonymous


There are many positive triggers that remind us of Christmas: snow, decorations, "Silent Night," "Jingle Bells," wrapped packages, a nativity scene, stockings hung on a fireplace. These "triggers" can evoke in us the warm, nostalgic feelings of the Christmas celebration.

There are other kinds of triggers, though, that may be less apparent and evoke different feelings and memories.

Our mind is like a powerful computer. It links sight, sound, smell, touch, and taste with feelings, thoughts, and memories. It links our senses - and we remember.

Sometimes the smallest, most innocuous incident can trigger memories. Not all our memories are pleasant, especially if we grew up in an alcoholic, dysfunctional setting.

We may not understand why we suddenly feel afraid, depressed, and anxious. We may not understand what has triggered our codependent coping behaviors - the low self worth, the need to control, the need to neglect ourselves. When that happens, we need to understand that some innocuous event may be triggering memories recorded deep within us.

If something, even something we don't understand, triggers painful memories, we can pull ourselves back into the present by self care: acknowledging our feelings, detaching, working the Steps, and affirming ourselves. We can take action to feel good. We can help ourselves feel better each Christmas. No matter what the past held, we can put it in perspective, and create a more pleasant holiday today.

Today, I will gently work through my memories of this holiday season. I will accept my feelings, even if I consider them different than what others are feeling this holiday. God, help me let go, heal from, and release the painful memories surrounding the holidays. Help me finish my business from the past, so I can create the holiday of my choice.

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation. 

****************************************************************

 
Food for Thought
Warning: Danger Ahead

After we have lived the OA program for a time, it becomes a part of our deepest self. When a thought or impulse arises which threatens our program, we often feel a twinge of fear at the same time. This feeling of fear is a warning that whatever we are contemplating may be hazardous to our health.

Not to heed these warning signals is the height of folly. We have learned from sad experience that certain thoughts and actions are not for us, if we want to maintain our abstinence and our sanity. When confronted with a difficult choice, we need to listen carefully for the small voice of conscience, which warns us of disaster ahead if we choose foolishly.

Our Higher Power never allows us to be tempted beyond our ability to withstand the temptation, provided we recognize our need for His saving strength. By paying attention to the small warning twinges of fear, we can avoid thoughts and actions, which go against His, will for us.

May I heed the danger signals You send. 

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Recovery Meditations: December 22nd



~ RISING ABOVE ~

Our greatest glory is not in never failing,
but in rising up every time we fail.

Ralph Waldo Emerson



One of the major premises of our recovery program is "progress, not perfection." No one but me expects me to be perfect. I have a history of driving myself in the quest for perfection. I've set goals that are so lofty that I could never acheive them. In that respect, I'm probably my own worst enemy.

However, I can also be my own best friend. I don't have to set standards that are impossible for me to meet. In fact, we're told we need to live one day at a time. If I can do that, then I don't need to live up to my impossibly high standards. My goals aren't so out-of-reach if I can see them as daily things.

What happens if I fail to meet even the "one day at a time" goal? I start over, knowing that I don't have to stay down. I can rise up and begin again. That, for me, is the greatest thing.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will rise above my failures and shortcomings, and know that I'm making progress. I don't have to be perfect any more.


Jeff

*********************************************

Each Day a New Beginning

When action grows unprofitable, gather information; when information grows unprofitable, sleep.
—Ursula K. LeGuin


Sometimes we need to turn away from what's troubling us. Turn it over, says the Third Step. hanging onto a situation for which no solution is immediately apparent, only exaggerates the situation. It is often said the solution to any problem lies within it. However, turning the problem over and over in our minds keeps our attention on the outer appearance, not the inner solution.

Rest, meditation, quiet attention to other matters, other persons, opens the way for God to reveal the solution. Every problem can be resolved. And no answer is ever withheld for long. We need to be open to it, though. We need to step away from our ego, outside of the problem and then listen fully to the words of friends, to the words that rise from our own hearts. Too much thinking, incessant analyzing, will keep any problem a problem.

I will rest from my thoughts. I will give my attention wholly to the present. Therein will come the solution, and when least expected.

From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. 

**********************************************

Food for Thought
Daring

What is it inside our heads that keeps daring us to try once more to prove that we are not compulsive overeaters? What kind of stupidity makes us think that this time we can get away with taking one compulsive bite? In a moment of blind bravado, we can lose months or years of hard won control.

Our ego is our own worst enemy. We forget that once a compulsive overeater, always a compulsive overeater. We tell ourselves that since we have been doing so well for so long, surely we can manage one or two small deviations. We rebel against the program and place ourselves above it. We forget that we have a disease, and we decide to do what we feel like doing, oblivious to the fact that by taking that first compulsive bite we are destroying our sanity and our serenity.

This kind of daring is to be avoided at all costs. The best antidote is the humility, which reminds us of the reality of our illness. We are not like everyone else. We are compulsive overeaters and do not dare to throw away our program.

Save me from the kind of daring that destroys me. 

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation. 

************************************************

The Language of Letting Go
Good Things Coming

Do not worry about how the good that has been planned for you will come.

It will come.

Do not worry, obsess, and think you have to control it, go out hunting for it, or tangle your mind trying to figure out how and when it will find you.

It will find you.

Surrender to your Higher Power each day. Trust your Higher Power. Then, stay peaceful. Trust and listen to yourself. That is how the good you want will come to you.

Your healing. Your joy. Your relationships. Your solutions. That job. That desired change. That opportunity. It will come to you - naturally, with ease, and in a host of ways.

That answer will come. The direction will come. The money. The idea. The energy. The creativity. The path will open itself to you. Trust that, for it has already been planned.

It is futile, a waste and drain of energy, to worry about how it will come. It is already there. You have it already. It is in place. You just cannot see it!

You will be brought to it, or it will be brought to you.

Today, I will relax and trust that the good I need, will find me. Either through my leadings, or the leadings of others, all I want and need will come to me when the time is right. 

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation