For Today: October 27th

We may with advantage at times forget what we know.

Publilius Syrus

I have learned a great deal, and I know what I know.  Don’t tell me how to live my life.  I eat because I was emotionally deprived as a child, and nothing---not this one’s God or that one’s Higher Power----can change it.

Somehow, in OA, I forgot all that.  I went ahead and acted as if everything they told me was true.  I prayed to a concept of God that was no more than three letters of the alphabet, but I prayed.

Abstinence was equally “dumb,”  but I did it anyway.

I still know what I know but, thank God, I am no longer using it to keep me from getting well.

For Today:  If I find it difficult to forget what I know, it is just as effective to “act as if” I’ve forgotten.

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 I've read every diet book ever published; I've tried every DIET ever invented.  Yeah, I know what I know, and all that knowledge brought me to my knees in despair, praying to a God I'd all but forgotten about whilst obsessed with my addictions.

That's what addiction does: it strips us of dignity........it thrusts us into an abyss and convinces us there is no way out.

And, as long as I insist on trying new weight loss schemes, I sentence myself to thinking I can control something that can't BE controlled.

Powerlessness over food and my surrender OF that powerlessness is the only way.  God can and does give me something I cannot give MYSELF: freedom from obsession.  

All I need is faith and a strong, structured Food Plan to stay on track.  I am no longer starving myself, punishing myself, jumping up & down on a scale, working out like a maniac, gorging myself mindlessly, or living that old life of extreme behavior.  There are no more diets that will start on "Monday" after I gorge myself on Sunday.  

For today, I pray to forget EVERYTHING I know about diets, nutrition and weight loss.  I pray to forget all the jibberish from all the 'experts'.  While I pray to forget all I DO know, I also pray to remember what it feels like to be compulsively overeating and out of control.  All I need to stay the course is my Food Plan & the fellowship of Overeaters Anonymous.  The 12 Steps will lead me OUT of the torture chamber I've locked myself into for the majority of my life.  

For today, I pray to live the remainder of my life in peace & serenity, literally, one day at a time.