Food for Thought: December 20th

A No Fault Illness

Formerly, we may have blamed our parents, a disappointment in love, economic insecurity, or a million other factors for our addiction to compulsive overeating. We probably spent much time and energy trying to figure out why we overate.

When we get honest with ourselves, we assume the responsibility for our own actions, instead of trying to shift it somewhere else. Many of us come to believe that we would be compulsive overeaters no matter what the circumstances of our lives. As we recover, we see that the why of our illness is unanswerable and unimportant. What counts is how we control it.

We do not continue to berate ourselves for having this illness, or consider ourselves physically, morally, or spiritually inferior for having contracted it. Blaming ourselves is as useless as blaming someone else. We accept the fact that through no one's fault we have the disease of compulsive overeating. Then we get on with the business of learning to control this illness with the help of our Higher Power and the OA program.

I blame no one for my illness.

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.

My Certified Health Coach Website

**************************************************************

While I don't blame myself or anyone else for being a compulsive overeater, I do feel it's important to know why I have eaten this way for the past 50 years.  Becoming truthful with myself, and not hiding that truth inside of a pile of food is important for my recovery.  I need to know my triggers so I can have a plan of action in place to deal with them when they appear.  Yes, my Food Plan prevails, always...........but I have had my bad moments where I've overeaten in spite of it.

COE is cunning & powerful.............but the 'why's' of it ARE answerable, at least for me.  Once the food coma dissipates, thanks to compliance with the Food Plan, the 'why's' become a whole lot clearer.  I see that I've used my illness to hide and to isolate.........to push out fear and feelings of unworthiness.  I see how abandonment issues were never dealt with properly, and instead, stuffed DOWN with excess food.

For me, the 'why's' are just as important as controlling the disease with the Food Plan. 

For today, I blame no one for my illness, least of all myself.........but I continue to work on the 'why's' and on discovering who I really AM, inside.  With the help of my Higher Power, I can achieve all of my goals, one day at a time, one abstinent meal at a time.