We are apt to be very pert at censuring others, where we will not endure advice ourselves.
William Penn
Recognition of my faults does not always save me from them. I find myself slipping into advice-giving, despite my distaste for someone else’s advice and my conviction that we are not here to advise anyone.
When I make that mistake, I ask forgiveness of the person I tried to advise. That is the first step toward removal of this defect; and if I confess it to my group, I am even closer to attaining a measure of humility.
For Today: People may seem to want my advice, but that is no reason for me to give it. In OA, I am just another member, not a counselor.
I am very prone to giving ‘free advice’, even when it isn’t asked of me. That’s been an ongoing problem for me on the Medifast website where I’ve been active for so long. The program has a set of solid rules to follow, so nobody really needs ‘advice’……but, in a board format, it’s hard NOT to give advice when it is sought ALL over the place. This is why I have ventured out to Blogspot……I cannot continue giving out advice AND saying I’m an OAer…..that is Talking the Talk but not Walking the Walk. Here at Blogspot, I am free to say what I want & interpret these For Today readings as I see fit, and from my own perspective. I am not advising anyone, I am simply speaking from my own experience with the program. I can revisit these blogs when I need to re-think some of my ideas, when they tend to get warped or when I start trying to work the program my way. If I use this as a journal/diary, I can get out some of my own thoughts without having it sound as if I am ‘passing judgment’ on someone else. That is in direct violation of the 12 Step principles & not something I want to continue doing. I detest being given advice myself, as this reading discusses, so who am I to pass out advice? I think I may wind up hurting some feelings when I do so, and, that is NEVER my intent.
For today, I am grateful for this place to vent & to discuss my feelings & thoughts.
Dearest Chris- You are being too hard on yourself. I have been corresponding with you for years, and do not find this to be true. You are quick to point out that this was YOUR path that led YOU to successful abstinence. People follow you because of the serenity and peace in your nature and your kindness and encouragement in your writings.
ReplyDeleteMichele