Recovery
Meditations: January 9th
~ SEEING
CLEARLY ~
If your eyes
hurt after you drink coffee,
you have to
take the spoon out of the cup.
Norm Crosby
For so many years I had trouble seeing
the obvious. I felt blind when dealing with emotions. I didn't know how to
express anger properly. I was either furious (and eating) over little things,
or emotionally void (and eating) over big things. I was told my feelings were
hurt too easily, so I began to stifle my rightfully hurt feelings, using food
to stuff the pain. But the worst was happiness. I was hysterically happy over
the stupidest little things, and felt immensely unworthy of kindnesses done for
me. Neither felt comfortable, so I always ended up eating.
It all began to come clear in the
program. For once I could see my actions and my reactions and begin to
understand myself and my motives. As I have worked this program, I no longer
feel like my emotions swing on a pendulum from one extreme to the other. I can
see things as they really are. I no longer make big mountains out of small
hills or make small hills out of big mountains. I can now feel happiness, and
express it, in complete comfort with myself. The nicest part is that while I
may not be well-acquainted with my new behavior yet, it feels very comfortable,
and I no longer have to practice my eating disorders to cover up my feelings.
One day at a time...
My eyes are opened by the program to
the truth of what is and the feelings that are.
~ Rhonda H. ~
*************************************************************
Each Day a New Beginning
The Chinese say
that water is the most powerful element, because it is perfectly
nonresistant. It can wear away a rock and sweep all before it.
—Florence Scovel Shinn
Nonresistance, ironically, may be a posture we struggle with. Nonresistance means surrendering the ego absolutely. For many of us, the ego, particularly disguised as false pride, spurred us on to struggle after struggle. "Can't they see I'm right?" we moaned, and our resistance only created more of itself. Conversely, flowing with life, "bubbling" with the ripples, giving up our ego, releases from us an energy that heals the situation - that smoothes the negative vibrations in our path. Peace comes to us.
We will find serenity each time we willingly humble ourselves.
Resistance is more familiar. Nonresistance means growth and peace. I'll try for serenity today.
—Florence Scovel Shinn
Nonresistance, ironically, may be a posture we struggle with. Nonresistance means surrendering the ego absolutely. For many of us, the ego, particularly disguised as false pride, spurred us on to struggle after struggle. "Can't they see I'm right?" we moaned, and our resistance only created more of itself. Conversely, flowing with life, "bubbling" with the ripples, giving up our ego, releases from us an energy that heals the situation - that smoothes the negative vibrations in our path. Peace comes to us.
We will find serenity each time we willingly humble ourselves.
Resistance is more familiar. Nonresistance means growth and peace. I'll try for serenity today.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
*******************************************************************
Food for Thought
Use the Telephone
When we join OA, we discover that we are not alone. We become part of a large network of individuals who share a common problem, compulsive overeating, and who gain strength and support from each other. The telephone is our lifeline. A phone conversation is a mini meeting, and most of us find that we need several each day.
It is suggested that we make at least three phone calls every day, in addition to calling our food sponsor. We call in times of temptation and difficulty, and we also call when we have good news to share. A phone call may be a means of preventing problems later in the day or it may be simply a gesture of friendship and fellowship - keeping in touch.
Whatever the reason, the person called is helped as much as the caller. The telephone call is a reminder that none of us is alone, that we have a program, which sustains us, and that together we shall succeed.
May I not be too proud or too shy or too busy to use the telephone.
When we join OA, we discover that we are not alone. We become part of a large network of individuals who share a common problem, compulsive overeating, and who gain strength and support from each other. The telephone is our lifeline. A phone conversation is a mini meeting, and most of us find that we need several each day.
It is suggested that we make at least three phone calls every day, in addition to calling our food sponsor. We call in times of temptation and difficulty, and we also call when we have good news to share. A phone call may be a means of preventing problems later in the day or it may be simply a gesture of friendship and fellowship - keeping in touch.
Whatever the reason, the person called is helped as much as the caller. The telephone call is a reminder that none of us is alone, that we have a program, which sustains us, and that together we shall succeed.
May I not be too proud or too shy or too busy to use the telephone.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
**********************************************************************
The Language of Letting Go
Responsibility for Ourselves
We have been doing the wrong things for the right reasons.
—CODEPENDENT NO MORE
Caretaking: the act of taking responsibility for other people while neglecting responsibility for ourselves. When we instinctively feel responsible for the feelings, thoughts, choices, problems, comfort, and destiny of others, we are caretakers. We may believe, at an unconscious level, that others are responsible for our happiness, just as we're responsible for theirs.
It's a worthy goal to be a considerate, loving, nurturing person. But caretaking is neglecting us to the point of feeling victimized. Caretaking involves caring for others in ways that hamper them in learning to take responsibility for themselves.
Caretaking doesn't work. It hurts other people; it hurts us. People get angry. They feel hurt, used, and victimized. So do we.
The kindest and most generous behavior we can choose is taking responsibility for ourselves - for what we think, feel, want, and need. The most beneficial act we can perform is to be true to ourselves, and let others take responsibility for themselves.
Today, I will pay attention to my actual responsibilities to myself. I will let others do the same. If I am in doubt about what my actual responsibilities are, I will take an inventory.
We have been doing the wrong things for the right reasons.
—CODEPENDENT NO MORE
Caretaking: the act of taking responsibility for other people while neglecting responsibility for ourselves. When we instinctively feel responsible for the feelings, thoughts, choices, problems, comfort, and destiny of others, we are caretakers. We may believe, at an unconscious level, that others are responsible for our happiness, just as we're responsible for theirs.
It's a worthy goal to be a considerate, loving, nurturing person. But caretaking is neglecting us to the point of feeling victimized. Caretaking involves caring for others in ways that hamper them in learning to take responsibility for themselves.
Caretaking doesn't work. It hurts other people; it hurts us. People get angry. They feel hurt, used, and victimized. So do we.
The kindest and most generous behavior we can choose is taking responsibility for ourselves - for what we think, feel, want, and need. The most beneficial act we can perform is to be true to ourselves, and let others take responsibility for themselves.
Today, I will pay attention to my actual responsibilities to myself. I will let others do the same. If I am in doubt about what my actual responsibilities are, I will take an inventory.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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If you do not express your own original ideas, if you do not listen to your own being, you will have betrayed yourself.
--Rollo May
Those of us who go around trying to be right and do everything right are likely to betray ourselves. We stifle our impulses and control our intuition because we can't be certain that we are correct. As a spiritual exercise, we could stop now and listen to our inner selves and state our own ideas. What comes out may break the illusion of perfection and free us to proceed with life.
We all have original ideas if we just notice them. What images come to mind while listening to music? What do our dreams tell us? New insights sometimes come by physical activity. Conversation with a friend can help lead us to our wisdom. Our growing strength in recovery requires that we listen to our own messages and then take some risks to express them.
Today, I will take risks by stating my ideas. I will stand up for myself by listening to my intuition.
You are reading from the book:
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