Owning Our Energy
Learn to keep your energy inside.
—From Women, Sex, and Addiction, Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
For many reasons, we may have mastered the art of giving away our energy. We may have learned it when we were young because the feelings we had were too overwhelming to feel, and we did not know how to process them.
Much of our obsessing, our intense focus on others, is done to facilitate this "out of body" experience we call codependency.
We obsess, we babble, we become anxious. We try to control, care take, and fuss over others. Our energy spills out of us on to whomever.
Our energy is our energy. Our feelings, thoughts, issues, love, sexuality; our mental, physical, spiritual, sexual, creative, and emotional energy is ours.
We can learn to have healthy boundaries - healthy parameters - around our energy and ourselves. We can learn to keep our energy within ourselves and deal with our issues.
If we are trying to escape from our body, if our energy is spilling out of us in unhealthy ways, we can ask ourselves what is going on, what is hurting us, what we are avoiding, what we need to face, what we need to deal with.
Then, we can do that. We can come back home to live - in ourselves.
Today, I will keep my energy in my body. I will stay focused and within my boundaries. God, help me let go of my need to escape myself. Help me face my issues so I am comfortable living in my body.
Learn to keep your energy inside.
—From Women, Sex, and Addiction, Charlotte Davis Kasl, Ph.D.
For many reasons, we may have mastered the art of giving away our energy. We may have learned it when we were young because the feelings we had were too overwhelming to feel, and we did not know how to process them.
Much of our obsessing, our intense focus on others, is done to facilitate this "out of body" experience we call codependency.
We obsess, we babble, we become anxious. We try to control, care take, and fuss over others. Our energy spills out of us on to whomever.
Our energy is our energy. Our feelings, thoughts, issues, love, sexuality; our mental, physical, spiritual, sexual, creative, and emotional energy is ours.
We can learn to have healthy boundaries - healthy parameters - around our energy and ourselves. We can learn to keep our energy within ourselves and deal with our issues.
If we are trying to escape from our body, if our energy is spilling out of us in unhealthy ways, we can ask ourselves what is going on, what is hurting us, what we are avoiding, what we need to face, what we need to deal with.
Then, we can do that. We can come back home to live - in ourselves.
Today, I will keep my energy in my body. I will stay focused and within my boundaries. God, help me let go of my need to escape myself. Help me face my issues so I am comfortable living in my body.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
************************************************************
I watch this behavior with my mother ALL the time. She is so anxious to avoid HERSELF that she fusses over others intensely. She can't sit still for more than 5 minutes (at 86 years old) & is constantly 'bored' and looking for something to do. The house is immaculate, with everything lined up perfectly, not a thing out of place. When another person enters the scene, she is all over him/her like white on rice, gushing and complimenting them, obsessing over their every word. Once the person leaves, she is judging them by commenting negatively on everything they've said or done. Nothing ever meets her standards, so she continues the search for perfection which constantly eludes her.
I have been trained in co-dependency from the Queen herself, who does not realize her own behaviors. It took me a lot of years to see the dysfunctional attitude in MYSELF and to address it, in an effort to stop escaping from my own body. It's taken me decades to feel worthy and comfortable in my own skin, not reliant upon others to dictate it FOR me.
I have been trained in co-dependency from the Queen herself, who does not realize her own behaviors. It took me a lot of years to see the dysfunctional attitude in MYSELF and to address it, in an effort to stop escaping from my own body. It's taken me decades to feel worthy and comfortable in my own skin, not reliant upon others to dictate it FOR me.
Other people's opinion of me is none of my business.
When I find myself obsessing over something, or focusing my energy on another person, I step back & shoot up a prayer to God. I recognize this behavior as debilitating and unhealthy, and I reel myself IN before I go too far in my quest to please others. I am responsible for pleasing myself and God; nobody else. My energy belongs to me, and it's not meant to spill out onto others as a means of escape.
For today, I will keep my energy in my body. I will stay focused, through abstinence & awareness, and within my own boundaries. God help me let go of my need to escape myself; help me to face my issues so I can enjoy the comfort of living in my body.
For today, I AM good enough.
No apologies
If you have hurt someone, then apologies are most certainly in order. If you haven't, then you have no need to apologize to anyone.
Be who you are, loving who you love, admiring what you admire, and valuing what you value. Instead of worrying about what other people might think, focus on what will bring you authentic fulfillment.
Be kind and helpful and loving toward others, but don't be a slave to their opinions. Live with richness, with originality, and with no apologies.
Make your own way through each day, taking responsibility for your actions and for your life. Be true to your highest, authentic values, doing what you know is right and good, creative and valuable.
Your life is unique and precious, so give it the respect and commitment it deserves. Your possibilities are amazing, so use your full efforts to bring the best of them unashamedly to life.
Live with true purpose and rock solid integrity. And you won't be wasting your time or energy on apologies.
Ralph Marston - The Daily Motivator
For today, I AM good enough.
No apologies
If you have hurt someone, then apologies are most certainly in order. If you haven't, then you have no need to apologize to anyone.
Be who you are, loving who you love, admiring what you admire, and valuing what you value. Instead of worrying about what other people might think, focus on what will bring you authentic fulfillment.
Be kind and helpful and loving toward others, but don't be a slave to their opinions. Live with richness, with originality, and with no apologies.
Make your own way through each day, taking responsibility for your actions and for your life. Be true to your highest, authentic values, doing what you know is right and good, creative and valuable.
Your life is unique and precious, so give it the respect and commitment it deserves. Your possibilities are amazing, so use your full efforts to bring the best of them unashamedly to life.
Live with true purpose and rock solid integrity. And you won't be wasting your time or energy on apologies.
Ralph Marston - The Daily Motivator
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