Recovery Meditations: May 27th

Balance

"I've learned that you can't have everything ...
and do everything ...
at the same time."

Oprah Winfrey


Learning about balance has been a struggle throughout my life; both as an addict and as a mother, friend, lover, sister... and woman. I'm not sure if it is my addiction that causes me to be over-zealous when it comes to giving too much to too many, or if my desire for love has manifested my addiction out of a need to feel full and satisfied. For me, finding that spot where a relationship is comfortable and not one-sided, where work is just 'work' and not all that nourishes my life... where school is an enhancement and not a crutch for hiding and isolating, is a hard place to for me to find. I see patterns within my life where I consistently struggle for harmony and balance. Why isn't one of anything enough? No matter what it is that is in my life; relationships, work, eating, shopping, I have to work at managing balance so that things flow at the right pace, otherwise, my entire life is off kilter.

But today, I don't need to struggle. I don't need to overdo my relationships or my work. I can do just one thing and know that the rest will be there tomorrow. Today I have the gifts that have been given to me to manage my life.

One Day at a Time . . .
I pray that God will help me to manage and balance my life so that I can do a good job with all things, especially living.

~ Pamela

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"My definition of balance is being able to obsess equally in all areas of my life.
~Alcoholics Anonymous

 If I was a naturally balanced person, I probably wouldn't be an addict!

Trying, futilely, to be all-things-to-all-people-at-all-times is what drives me to eat and drink excessively.  


I'm not only a compulsive eater, I am a compulsive thinker.  Stuck inside of my own head, I can hang out there forever & believe I'm truly alone in the world.  I can feel absolute isolation & separateness, like I belong nowhere and am connected to nobody.

Today, I realize that I don't have to do everything perfectly. I don't have to be all things to all people at all times, nor will I strive to be. 

For today, what I have is more than enough.  For today, I will practice balanced living.  For today, I will manage my life, with God's help.

For today, I will LIVE for today only.

 "Yesterday's a cancelled check, tomorrow's a promissory note, but today is cash, spend it wisely."
~Alcoholics Anonymous