Recovery Meditations: August 26th
LOVE
"When you love you should not say,
"God is in my heart," but rather,
"I am in the heart of God."
Kahlil Gibran
What is love? And what does it mean to love myself? I’ve found from my experience that it is easier to describe what love is not. Through many failures -- and with my Higher Power’s help -- I have discovered that to love myself means choosing to not hurt myself by overeating. Self-love means choosing to no longer ignore my inner-child who sometimes screams to be heard and must have a tantrum to get my attention. Self-love means not isolating or allowing the hurtful, grieving, angry, fearful thoughts to possess my mind to the degree that the disease overtakes any sanity I may have. This list could go on -- focusing on the failures and the negative -- but my Higher Power has given me the desire, strength and power to feel, express and give love. Our Higher Power offers the freedom and joy of self-love to each of us who are willing to receive and practice it.
The more I am able to receive the love of others, the more I am able to love myself. And conversely, the more I love myself, the more I am able to receive love from others. As I work this Twelve Step program to the best of my ability each 24 hours, I am shown love through meetings, my sponsor, meditating, journaling, spending time with my Higher Power, and sharing my experience, strength and hope with another person. Some days, “the best of my ability” may be to just get out of bed and say the Third Step prayer. Other days, “the best of my ability” will seem like I'm working the program close to perfection. Regardless of my ability on any particular day, I’ve found that love can be gleaned from each day.
As the quote above states, "I am in the heart of God." I experience this when I am willing to surrender daily to the will of my Higher Power and to be completely and absolutely surrounded and protected by the heart of God.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will seek to see love in as many moments as possible by looking to my Higher Power and then reaching out to others.
~ Ohitika
The Third Step Prayer
from page 63 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous
God, I offer myself to Thee-
To build with me
and to do with me as Thou wilt.
Relieve me of the bondage of self,
that I may better do Thy will.
Take away my difficulties,
that victory over them may bear witness
to those I would help of Thy Power,
Thy Love, and Thy Way of life.
May I do Thy will always!
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Each Day a New Beginning
A woman who has
no way of expressing herself and of realizing herself as a full human
has nothing else to turn to but the owning of material things.
—Enriqueta Longeaux y Vasquez
Each of us struggling with these Twelve Steps is finding self-expression and self-definition. Introspection, coupled with self-revelation through sharing with others, affords us the awareness of how like others we are. How human we are. And what we receive from others who respond to our vulnerability diminishes our need for "things" to fill our lives.
The love that we receive freely from a trusting, caring friend or group fills up the empty places in our souls, the places we used to try filling up with alcohol or cookies or sex. New clothes maybe even a new home or a different job served their terms as void fillers too. Nothing succeeded for long, and then the program found us.
The program is the filler for all times. Of this we can be certain. Time will alleviate any doubts we may have. All that is asked of us is openness, honesty, and attention to others' needs as well as our own.
I can share our likenesses and relish whatever differences may surface. The chain of friendship I've created makes me the proud owner of my wholeness. I am a succeeding woman who is moving forward with courage and self-awareness on this, my road of life.
—Enriqueta Longeaux y Vasquez
Each of us struggling with these Twelve Steps is finding self-expression and self-definition. Introspection, coupled with self-revelation through sharing with others, affords us the awareness of how like others we are. How human we are. And what we receive from others who respond to our vulnerability diminishes our need for "things" to fill our lives.
The love that we receive freely from a trusting, caring friend or group fills up the empty places in our souls, the places we used to try filling up with alcohol or cookies or sex. New clothes maybe even a new home or a different job served their terms as void fillers too. Nothing succeeded for long, and then the program found us.
The program is the filler for all times. Of this we can be certain. Time will alleviate any doubts we may have. All that is asked of us is openness, honesty, and attention to others' needs as well as our own.
I can share our likenesses and relish whatever differences may surface. The chain of friendship I've created makes me the proud owner of my wholeness. I am a succeeding woman who is moving forward with courage and self-awareness on this, my road of life.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Food for Thought
A Living Program
The Twelve Steps are a program for living and they are also a living program. Taking them is not something we do once and for all, but something we repeat over and over in greater depth. They are our guidelines for each day.
Our program develops as our understanding matures. When we first join OA, physical abstinence from compulsive overeating may be all we can handle. As we learn from fellow members and are increasingly exposed to the power of the group, our program comes to include more emotional and spiritual elements. The possibilities for development are limitless.
One thing leads to another. The creative force that guides OA directs our individual efforts. When we are open to the challenges and willing to give up self-will, we make progress, which gratifies and astounds us. This program not only works as we work it; it also grows as we grow.
We thank You for Your creative spirit.
The Twelve Steps are a program for living and they are also a living program. Taking them is not something we do once and for all, but something we repeat over and over in greater depth. They are our guidelines for each day.
Our program develops as our understanding matures. When we first join OA, physical abstinence from compulsive overeating may be all we can handle. As we learn from fellow members and are increasingly exposed to the power of the group, our program comes to include more emotional and spiritual elements. The possibilities for development are limitless.
One thing leads to another. The creative force that guides OA directs our individual efforts. When we are open to the challenges and willing to give up self-will, we make progress, which gratifies and astounds us. This program not only works as we work it; it also grows as we grow.
We thank You for Your creative spirit.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
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The Language of Letting Go
Making Amends
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
—Step Nine of Al-Anon
When we make amends we need to be clear about what we're apologizing for and the best way to say we're sorry. What we are really doing with our amends is taking responsibility for our behavior. We need to be sure that the process itself will not be self-defeating or hurtful.
Sometimes, we need to directly apologize for a particular thing we have done or our part in a problem.
Other times, instead of saying "I'm sorry," what we need to do is work on changing our behavior with a person.
There are times when bringing up what we have done and apologizing for it will make matters worse.
We need to trust timing, intuition, and guidance in this process of making amends. Once we become willing, we can let go and tackle our amends in a peaceful, consistent, harmonious way. If nothing feels right or appropriate, if it feels as if what we are about to do will cause a crisis or havoc, we need to trust that feeling.
Attitude, honesty, openness, and willingness count here. In peace and harmony, we can strive to clear up our relationships.
We deserve to be at peace with others and ourselves.
Today, I will be open to making any amends I need to make with people. I will wait for Divine Guidance in the process of making any amends that are not clear to me. I will act, when led. God, help me let go of my fear about facing people and taking responsibility for my behaviors. Help me know I am not diminishing my self-esteem by doing this; I am improving it.
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
—Step Nine of Al-Anon
When we make amends we need to be clear about what we're apologizing for and the best way to say we're sorry. What we are really doing with our amends is taking responsibility for our behavior. We need to be sure that the process itself will not be self-defeating or hurtful.
Sometimes, we need to directly apologize for a particular thing we have done or our part in a problem.
Other times, instead of saying "I'm sorry," what we need to do is work on changing our behavior with a person.
There are times when bringing up what we have done and apologizing for it will make matters worse.
We need to trust timing, intuition, and guidance in this process of making amends. Once we become willing, we can let go and tackle our amends in a peaceful, consistent, harmonious way. If nothing feels right or appropriate, if it feels as if what we are about to do will cause a crisis or havoc, we need to trust that feeling.
Attitude, honesty, openness, and willingness count here. In peace and harmony, we can strive to clear up our relationships.
We deserve to be at peace with others and ourselves.
Today, I will be open to making any amends I need to make with people. I will wait for Divine Guidance in the process of making any amends that are not clear to me. I will act, when led. God, help me let go of my fear about facing people and taking responsibility for my behaviors. Help me know I am not diminishing my self-esteem by doing this; I am improving it.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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Mile by mile, life's a trial.
Yard by yard, it's not so hard.
Inch by inch, it's a cinch.
-- Proverb
An important key to progress on the path is to take it one step at a time. Just as investing a little on a regular basis builds long-term wealth, the little gains we make each day pay off in spiritual dividends. As a successful musical group explained, "We spent years preparing for our overnight success."
Taking it one step at a time means living in the present moment, letting life gradually reveal itself to us. Some people get nervous and want to know the final outcome. But how can we know an outcome that hasn't yet occurred? Trust in the process, and the perfect result will occur.
When our faith wavers, we often get ahead of ourselves and try to figure out what is going to happen. This "future tripping" removes us from our source of guidance in the present. Sometimes we try to hit it big in a hurry. But there is no fooling the Universe. Sooner or later we will have to go back and retrace the steps that we skipped. The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary.
Whatever the goal or desire, approach it one step at a time. Small measures consistently taken guarantee progress. Eventually you will emerge victorious, having attained a reward that you have truly earned.
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