Food for Thought: February 24th

Values

What do I value most? What is number one in my life? What is at the center?

When I was overeating, I was the center. I was the biggest thing in my universe, and all else revolved around me - a frightening state of affairs, since egotism does not bring peace of mind or security. Self was most important to me, and that egotism was my downfall. When I fell off my high horse and hit bottom, I had nowhere to go except to something outside of myself.

As we compulsive overeaters take Step Two and come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity, then we begin to shift the center of our consciousness from ourselves to God. This is our only hope. As long as our weak selves are at the center, we cannot make real progress, either in controlling our addiction or in living useful lives.

When we hit bottom, we are humbled. When we are humbled, we are able to perceive and acknowledge that God is primary and that abstinence is our most important task. Values are sorted out and order brings inner peace and security.

You, Lord, are the center of my life.

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.

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When I was overeating, I was the center of the universe. There were only three people in my world: Me, Myself & I. I was constantly thinking about what to eat/drink, where to get it, how to hide the evidence, etc.  What a waste of time and energy!!!!!!!!!!

My egotism promised me I could control my own life perfectly, with no outside help, thank you very much.  My addiction lied & promised me happiness and 'freedom' in unlimited supplies of my drugs of choice.

Is there 'freedom' in being chained down to addiction? Having a few monkey's on my back is not freedom............it's slavery...................slavery to substances. Harmful, hateful, destructive substances that shorten my life and prevent me from fulfilling the PURPOSE of my life!

I am grateful to have hit rock bottom, because then I was humbled. Then the truth was revealed to me, and I saw things for what they really WERE. 

For today, I am not the center of my universe; God is.  Abstinence & sobriety is my most important task and I acknowledge & accept my duty to live a clean life, one day at a time.