Saying No
For many of us, the most difficult word to say is one of the shortest and easiest in the vocabulary: No. Go ahead, say it aloud: No.
No - simple to pronounce, hard to say. We're afraid people won't like us, or we feel guilty. We may believe that a "good" employee, child, parent, spouse, or Christian never says no.
The problem is, if we don't learn to say no, we stop liking ourselves and the people we always try to please. We may even punish others out of resentment.
When do we say no? When no is what we really mean.
When we learn to say no, we stop lying. People can trust us, and we can trust ourselves. All sorts of good things happen when we start saying what we mean.
If we're scared to say no, we can buy some time. We can take a break, rehearse the word, and go back and say no. We don't have to offer long explanations for our decisions.
When we can say no, we can say yes to the good. Our no's and our yes's begin to be taken seriously. We gain control of ourselves. And we learn a secret: "No" isn't really that hard to say.
Today, I will say no if that is what I mean.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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Saying No is vital for recovery. Another good thing to say No to is over-complicating our food plan.
Complicated food plans and complicated lives
work against us in this program. We compulsive overeaters have a hard
time making decisions about food, and the more simple our menus, the
better. We also tend to overextend ourselves in other areas, dissipating
energy, which we need for working our program.
Our three meals a day can be nourishing and attractive without being elaborate. If we spend too much time and energy planning and preparing our food, we run the risk of reactivating our obsession. Too much thinking about food usually leads to overeating and invariably produces mental turmoil.
Our three meals a day can be nourishing and attractive without being elaborate. If we spend too much time and energy planning and preparing our food, we run the risk of reactivating our obsession. Too much thinking about food usually leads to overeating and invariably produces mental turmoil.
Just say NO to complicated food plans!
For our peace of mind and emotional serenity, we need to keep the mechanics of our lives as simple as possible. If the spirit is to be free, it cannot be shackled by over concern with material things.
Saying No empowers us to take our rightful place in the world, and stop worrying about what people think of us.
Saying No means saying Yes to Recovery.
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