Recovery Meditations: August 4th

OTHERS

"In the deepest part of a compulsive eater's soul ...
is the realization that recovery begins when we find one another."
Anonymous


Growing up in the deep South in the 1950's, I witnessed things I never dreamed could happen. It taught me lessons I have never forgotten. Little did I think that someone like me could ever be discriminated against. After all, I was the right color, the right size, the right religion and lived on the right side of town.

Messages began to be taped early on in that little girl's brain ... into the psyche of that teenager who worked so hard to achieve ... and into the young woman who had the world by the tail. In adulthood those messages began to play ... and food made the messages easier to hear. So began the life of a compulsive eater. So began discrimination because of my weight.

Years later I would be grateful for my life as an overweight adult. I would look back and see that the God of my understanding was preparing me to see discrimination as a disease of the soul. But what happened to give me serenity and peace and contentment? I found another compulsive eater. And then I found another ... and another. And recovery began.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will overwrite those taped messages;
I will not regret the past;
And I will cherish my fellows forever.

~ Mari

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It's hard to imagine being grateful for a disease, especially one like compulsive overeating. The tendency is to feel more self-pity than appreciation.  "Why me?" 

 

Nothing worth having comes easy. It took me 40 years of addiction to finally put my ego aside so I could be shown freedom.  A structured food plan IS freedom, despite the fact that many consider it bondage. 

The TRUE bondage is a life of slavery to addiction.

 

If I hadn't suffered the indignities of obesity, how would God have been able to prepare me to see discrimination? How would He have prepared me to share MY story with others who suffer and enable them to see the way OUT of their self-imposed misery?

 

For today, I AM grateful for my disease, because it has opened my eyes to the purpose of life: to pay my blessings forward; to share my struggles and vulnerabilities with the intent of lessening someone else's load.

 

For today, I thank God for ALL the lessons that come my way.