Recovery Meditations: April 21st

~ RELIGION ~

Religion is for people who don't want to go to hell.
Program is for people who have already been there.

Unknown


I was religious when I came into program and I was ready and willing to tell everyone what the "true" faith was. I went to church every Sunday. I was a religion teacher. I knew it all.

The truth is I didn't know ANYTHING. It didn't take long for me to begin to question my own religiosity. In fact, it began at Steps two and three. Before long, I wondered if there was a God at all. If there was, is God a He, a She or an It? Then I decided, yes there was a God, but did He/She/It care about me?

The real truth is God is who God needs to be to work through me. There's no right or wrong answer to my questions. What I DO know is that God loves me just the way I am.

The greatest gift my Higher Power gave me came on the day I looked up to "heaven" and told God, "I don't believe in You!" And that still, quiet voice inside of me asked, "Then to Whom are you speaking?"

One Day at a Time . . .
I don't have to have theological "proof" that there is a Power greater than myself. I just need to believe.

~ Debbie ~

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The 'proof' that God exists, for me, came about with miracle of recovery. Going from 225 lbs to 125 lbs wasn't achieved without a Higher Power guiding me, every step of the way.

  Staying at 125 lbs doesn't come without small miracles taking place on a daily basis.

When I put aside everything I 'knew' and everything I was taught as a child, is when I opened myself up to spirituality, which is entirely different than religion.

My religion taught me that God loves conditionally......only when I toe the line.  My religion had me feeling fearful of God and behaving only because of that fear.

Spirituality taught me that God loves me unconditionally, exactly as I am.  Whether I am toeing some line or not, God is in my heart & soul, and guiding my life every step of the way.

Spirituality taught me that fear is the opposite of faith & love...............that fearing God is a waste of energy, that love sets me free from the chains of addiction.

For today, I am grateful I don't need 'theological proof' that God exists. Feeling Him in my heart is all the proof I need.