ACCEPTANCE
“Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgement
of the facts of the situation. Then deciding what to do with it.”
Kathleen Casey Theisen
Before program I kept wishing that I had a perfect body, spouse, mother, child, or whatever. My dissatisfaction with the things in my life kept me from really accepting that things were exactly the way they were meant to be for that time. I always used the excuse, "If you had a spouse, ex-husband, mother, or whatever like I did, you’d also have to eat.” I never took responsibility for my compulsive eating and I lived in blame and guilt.
When I came into program and heard the Serenity Prayer at my first meeting, I didn’t fully understand its meaning. What I have finally come to understand is that I cannot begin to change the things within my control until I accept my powerlessness over food and over the people and circumstances in my life. I have now come to accept the fact that there are some things I cannot change, but I can change my attitude towards others. As I do so, I am learning to take responsibility for my part in the things that happen to me. What a difference that is from the past.
One day at a time ...
Only when I acknowledge and accept the reality of what is in my life, can I begin to change the things that are within my control.~ Sharon S.
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Each Day a New Beginning
For to be a woman
is to have interests and duties, raying out in all directions from the
central mother-core, like spokes from the hub of a wheel.
—Anne Morrow Lindbergh
It is sometimes easy to get overwhelmed by our duties, forgetting that our interests fit the scheme of our lives. They are inspired by our lives and flow from them. Our interests round us out; they beckon us to become our better selves.
Our duties have their places as well. In our careers, with our families and friends, we have responsibilities. People need to be able to count on us for our part in completing their particular scheme for life.
Finding the right balance between our duties and our interests takes daily attention. It is perhaps our greatest struggle. Feeling duty-bound is common among women; putting a low value on our interests is a familiar trick we play on ourselves.
We need reminding that our interests will cull out our better, inner selves. We must stretch to become all we are meant to be. Our interests entice us to live up to God's expectations.
Each day I need to pay heed to interests as well as duties. I will let no day go by without heeding an interest.
—Anne Morrow Lindbergh
It is sometimes easy to get overwhelmed by our duties, forgetting that our interests fit the scheme of our lives. They are inspired by our lives and flow from them. Our interests round us out; they beckon us to become our better selves.
Our duties have their places as well. In our careers, with our families and friends, we have responsibilities. People need to be able to count on us for our part in completing their particular scheme for life.
Finding the right balance between our duties and our interests takes daily attention. It is perhaps our greatest struggle. Feeling duty-bound is common among women; putting a low value on our interests is a familiar trick we play on ourselves.
We need reminding that our interests will cull out our better, inner selves. We must stretch to become all we are meant to be. Our interests entice us to live up to God's expectations.
Each day I need to pay heed to interests as well as duties. I will let no day go by without heeding an interest.
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Food for Thought
Food Is Not Love
With our heads, we know that food is not the same thing as love. When this fact sinks into our emotions, we are released from our obsession with food. In order to reach this point of emotional development, we need to abstain physically from compulsive overeating. As long as we are physically addicted to refined sugars and starches and binge foods, we do not have the perspective necessary to move away from our emotional attachment to these foods.
It is easy for babies and children to confuse food with love. As they mature, they learn to discriminate between the two. If we are compulsive overeaters, we need the OA program and a spiritual awakening to bring clarity to our confusion. We have much emotional and spiritual growing up to do.
If our early needs for love was not satisfied, no amount of food will compensate. It is by giving love that we are able to fill our inner emptiness, and it is through our Higher Power that we are healed and made able to love.
May we remember in our hearts that food is not love.
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Defining good in my life is up to me.
We've heard, "Life is as good as we make it," but this sounds far too simplistic. We look at friends, family, and co-workers and often see much unhappiness. If it's up to us to make life good, why do so few take advantage of the opportunity?
It's not that we don't want happiness. All of us do. But many of us mistakenly think happiness comes from outside ourselves. For example, when other people shower us with love, we're happy. When the boss compliments our work, we're happy. On the other hand, relying on our inner wisdom to tell us we're worthy and believing we are worthy are untapped skills for most of us. Fortunately, we are in the right place to acquire these skills.
Twelve Step programs will teach us, if we are ready to take responsibility for our own happiness. Our program friends are learning how to rely on their inner wisdom and their God, and we are learning from their example.
It's really only a simple change in perspective. It's looking within, not without, for knowledge of our worth. There's no mystery to it. We can do it just as they are doing it.
I will monitor how I evaluate my experiences today. Living peacefully and happily is up to me.
With our heads, we know that food is not the same thing as love. When this fact sinks into our emotions, we are released from our obsession with food. In order to reach this point of emotional development, we need to abstain physically from compulsive overeating. As long as we are physically addicted to refined sugars and starches and binge foods, we do not have the perspective necessary to move away from our emotional attachment to these foods.
It is easy for babies and children to confuse food with love. As they mature, they learn to discriminate between the two. If we are compulsive overeaters, we need the OA program and a spiritual awakening to bring clarity to our confusion. We have much emotional and spiritual growing up to do.
If our early needs for love was not satisfied, no amount of food will compensate. It is by giving love that we are able to fill our inner emptiness, and it is through our Higher Power that we are healed and made able to love.
May we remember in our hearts that food is not love.
************************************************************
The Language of Letting Go
Transformation through Grief
We're striving for acceptance in recovery - acceptance of our past, other people, our present circumstances, and ourselves. Acceptance brings peace, healing, and freedom - the freedom to take care of ourselves.
Acceptance is not a one step process. Before we achieve acceptance, we go toward it in stages of denial, anger, negotiating, and sadness. We call these stages the grief process. Grief can be frustrating. It can be confusing. We may vacillate between sadness and denial. Our behaviors may vacillate. Others may not understand us. We may neither understand our own behavior nor ourselves while we're grieving our losses. Then one day, things become clear. The fog lifts, and we see that we have been struggling to face and accept a particular reality.
Don't worry. If we are taking steps to take care of ourselves, we will move through this process at exactly the right pace. Be understanding with yourself and others for the very human way we go through transition.
Today, I will accept the way I go through change. I will accept the grief process, and its stages, as the way people accept loss and change.
We're striving for acceptance in recovery - acceptance of our past, other people, our present circumstances, and ourselves. Acceptance brings peace, healing, and freedom - the freedom to take care of ourselves.
Acceptance is not a one step process. Before we achieve acceptance, we go toward it in stages of denial, anger, negotiating, and sadness. We call these stages the grief process. Grief can be frustrating. It can be confusing. We may vacillate between sadness and denial. Our behaviors may vacillate. Others may not understand us. We may neither understand our own behavior nor ourselves while we're grieving our losses. Then one day, things become clear. The fog lifts, and we see that we have been struggling to face and accept a particular reality.
Don't worry. If we are taking steps to take care of ourselves, we will move through this process at exactly the right pace. Be understanding with yourself and others for the very human way we go through transition.
Today, I will accept the way I go through change. I will accept the grief process, and its stages, as the way people accept loss and change.
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Today's Thought from Hazelden:
We've heard, "Life is as good as we make it," but this sounds far too simplistic. We look at friends, family, and co-workers and often see much unhappiness. If it's up to us to make life good, why do so few take advantage of the opportunity?
It's not that we don't want happiness. All of us do. But many of us mistakenly think happiness comes from outside ourselves. For example, when other people shower us with love, we're happy. When the boss compliments our work, we're happy. On the other hand, relying on our inner wisdom to tell us we're worthy and believing we are worthy are untapped skills for most of us. Fortunately, we are in the right place to acquire these skills.
Twelve Step programs will teach us, if we are ready to take responsibility for our own happiness. Our program friends are learning how to rely on their inner wisdom and their God, and we are learning from their example.
It's really only a simple change in perspective. It's looking within, not without, for knowledge of our worth. There's no mystery to it. We can do it just as they are doing it.
I will monitor how I evaluate my experiences today. Living peacefully and happily is up to me.
You are reading from the book:
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