Sunday, August 12, 2012

Food for Thought: August 12th



The Beacon

There are times when we get tired and depressed or elated and confused. We are mentally uncomfortable, knowing that something is wrong but unable to pinpoint the trouble. Our first thought may be to reach for food, but we know that way leads to disaster.

We compulsive overeaters have a beacon light for our dark and confused moments. It is our commitment to abstinence. No matter how confused we may be, we can remember that abstinence is the most important thing in our life without exception. Whatever happens, we will not be lost if we hold fast to our abstinence. From the commitment, everything else follows. As long as we do not overeat, we will be able to find our way out of a difficult situation.

Our Higher Power gives us the beacon light of abstinence, and with it He gives guidance out of our perplexities. Patiently waiting until we clearly see His will keeps us from getting lost in the darkness of self-will.

Thank You for the beacon light of abstinence.

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
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I often find myself 'mentally uncomfortable', although I can't always pinpoint exactly why.  It's taken me SO long to identify my emotions, that sometimes I get confused trying to figure out WHAT it is I am actually feeling!!!  My first thought turns to food when I feel mentally uncomfortable.  When I'm alone in the house, my first thought turns to food too, since I have always been a closet eater. 
"Gee, why is she so fat when she never eats?"  Uh, because I eat when nobody's looking, that's why.
Anyway, my point is this: There are many, many times when my instincts turn to overeating. My food plan of Abstinence is what keeps those thoughts from turning into reality.  If I didn't have Abstinence to rely on, I'd be eating my way through dozens of uncomfortable situations every day!  Living in a food coma is NOT how I want to live! I want to live free from the burden of addiction, and I want to feel ALL of my emotions as they come up.  
My emotions will NOT kill me, but obesity & compulsive overeating WILL!
My commitment to Abstinence IS my beacon of light for my dark & confused moments. Excess food NEVER 'helps' me out of those kinds of moods................excess food NEVER 'comforts' me, although the disease tries to lie & trick me into thinking it WILL.

It won't. It never did, it never does, and it never will.
The only thing that helps me through emotional turmoil is Abstinence & God.
For today, I pray not to lose myself or compromise my program for ANYTHING or ANYONE.  No food on earth is worth the sacrifice.  To ditch my program IS to sacrifice my peace of mind & well being.

To forget my program 'just this once' is to get lost in the darkness of self-will.

For today, may I keep Abstinence #1 in my list of priorities.

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