For Today: August 30th

People wish to learn to swim and at the same time to keep one foot on the ground.

Marcel Proust

Only be being willing to give up the safety of the old can I find out what the new has for me.  Uncertainty, confusion and fear of leaving the safety of my old ways behind me are natural, but the need to save my life pushes me on.  I move beyond  my fears and prejudices and learn that I don’t have to act on them, that, one day at a time, I can face whatever must be faced.

I may think nostalgically of my old hiding place from time to time, but the truth is, nothing that could possibly happen today can make me go back.

For Today:  The direction God gives me is forward.  I am not afraid to take it.

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Actually, some days I AM afraid to move forward. There is something that feels safe about familiarity, about hiding OUT in a big sea of FOOD.

Sigh.

Change can be difficult. Some days, I fight it tooth and nail, while other days I surrender my fears and I allow God to stay in control.

But some days are particularly brutal.  I suppose that's part of Recovery and the price I have to pay to stay abstinent.

For today, I feel like keeping one foot on the ground, but I will push forward instead, jump into the water & pray to God it's not ice cold or full of sharks.