Recovery Meditations: October 20th
Limitations
“You cannot help men
permanently
by doing for them what
they could and should do for themselves.”
Abraham Lincoln
I love the idea of helping people. Seeing the other person
shine after my input gives me a great feeling. The flipside of this peak
experience is the sadness and bleakness I feel when the person I am helping
does not succeed. When it is all about me, I have to accept responsibility for
everything: the good and the bad.
Thank You, God, that it is not really me who is the source
of all help, it is You. I can point the way and make suggestions, but I cannot
make someone change for the better. What causes people to change is something
for which no person can take credit. It is simply divine!
The real question is whether or not the person I want to
help will turn to his or her Higher Power and use the help that is offered. I
cannot actually take these steps for others. I can pretend to do that, and
perhaps offer some temporary relief, but lasting recovery will come only to
those who make a quality decision to take the necessary steps on their own.
One day at a time...
I will realize the
limitations of my help. I will not try to do for others what only they can and
should do for themselves.
~ Q
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Each Day A New Beginning
—Joan Baez
How thrilling to contemplate that we can choose every attitude we have and every action we take. We have been gifted with full responsibility for our development. What will we try today? It's our personal choice. How will we decide on a particular issue? Our options are only limited by our vision.
Every situation in life offers us a significant opportunity for making a decision that will, of necessity, influence the remaining situations we encounter. Just as we are interdependent, needing and influencing one another in all instances that bring us together, likewise our decisions are never inviolate. Each is singly important; however, its impact is multiplied by the variety of other decisions triggered.
The choice is ours for livings fully today, for taking advantage of all the opportunities that present themselves. Our personal growths, our emotional and spiritual development, are in our hands. God will provide us with the guidance, and the program offers us the tools. The decision to act is ours, alone.
I will exercise my personal power. My choices determine my development.
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Food For Thought
Self-control is hard work. When the urge comes to do something, which we know is not in our best interest, we physically restrain ourselves from performing the destructive action. This often requires hard, physical effort.
We may want to eat when we should not be eating, we may want to lash out in anger, we may want to retreat from a difficult task, we may want to continue a harmful relationship. Whatever the urge, if we know deep down that it is contrary to God's will for us, we need to control it and not act on it.
Time spent with our Higher Power each day builds the strength and integrity, which can control our destructive urges. Alone, we are powerless, but with the OA program supporting us we find strength we never had before. With abstinence comes the clarity of mind necessary to evaluate our urges and desires.
May I have the moral strength to physically restrain myself when necessary.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation
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The Language of Letting Go
Sometimes people we love do things we don't like or approve of. We react. They react. Before long, we're all reacting to each other, and the problem escalates.
When do we detach? When we're hooked into a reaction of anger, fear, guilt, or shame. When we get hooked into a power play - an attempt to control or force others to do something they don't want to do. When the way we're reacting isn't helping the other person or solving the problem. When the way we're reacting is hurting us.
Often, it's time to detach when detachment appears to be the least likely, or possible, thing to do.
The first step toward detachment is understanding that reacting and controlling don't help. The next step is getting peaceful - getting centered and restoring our balance.
Take a walk. Leave the room. Go to a meeting. Take a long, hot bath. Call a friend. Call on God. Breathe deeply. Find peace. From that place of peace and centering will emerge an answer, a solution.
Today, I will surrender and trust that the answer is near.
From The
Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Today's thought from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
It is a matter first of beginning - and then following through.
--Richard L. Evans
How many times have we started a project or a new path of living only to abandon it after a short time? We may have thought it wasn't what we wanted or there wasn't enough time. Instead of following through, we usually gave up just when it was getting challenging and difficult.
What are our dreams today? Do we wish we could speak a second language, know how to operate a computer, exercise regularly, or attend more meetings? What's stopping us? Each task we'd like to accomplish can only be done by persistence and dedication. We learn a new language one word at a time, learn how to operate a computer one step at a time, exercise regularly one day at a time, and attend more meetings one night at a time.
We don't have to give up an endeavor just because the hard work has begun. Instead of looking down the road where we want to be, we need to look at this moment. If we take a step toward our goals, we'll be closer than if we never took that step.
I can walk toward my goal, remembering each step I take will bring me closer to achievement and personal reward.
--Richard L. Evans
How many times have we started a project or a new path of living only to abandon it after a short time? We may have thought it wasn't what we wanted or there wasn't enough time. Instead of following through, we usually gave up just when it was getting challenging and difficult.
What are our dreams today? Do we wish we could speak a second language, know how to operate a computer, exercise regularly, or attend more meetings? What's stopping us? Each task we'd like to accomplish can only be done by persistence and dedication. We learn a new language one word at a time, learn how to operate a computer one step at a time, exercise regularly one day at a time, and attend more meetings one night at a time.
We don't have to give up an endeavor just because the hard work has begun. Instead of looking down the road where we want to be, we need to look at this moment. If we take a step toward our goals, we'll be closer than if we never took that step.
I can walk toward my goal, remembering each step I take will bring me closer to achievement and personal reward.
You are reading from the book:
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