~ HOPE ~
Hope is the feeling you have
that the feeling you have isn't permanent.
Jean Kerr
I pray for hope today, and I am receiving hope today. Hope is something that comes more and more readily to me as I stay abstinent and continue working my program of recovery.
In the past, many of my feelings of hope were centered around the next diet or the next fix for my bingeing. However, now that I am abstaining and practicing the Twelve Steps, I have been freed to hope for bigger things. There is now space in my head where the food and diet obsession used to be!
One Day at a Time . . .
I will abstain. One day at a time I will direct my attention to the Steps when I am in need of a solution.
~ Christine ~
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Each Day a New Beginning
On any journey, we must find out where we are before we can plan the first step.
—Kathy Boevink
Our lives in all aspects are a journey toward a destination, one fitting to our purpose, our special gifts, our particular needs as women. Each day contributes to our journey, carrying us closer to our destination. However, we often take a circuitous route. We get stranded or waylaid by our selfish desires, by the intrusion of our controlling ego.
We can reflect on the progress we've made toward our destination, the steps we've taken that have unknowingly contributed to our journey. Our easiest steps have been the ones we took in partnership with God. It's in God's mind that our path is well marked.
We are just where we need to be today. The experiences that we meet are like points on the map of our journey. Some of them are rest stops. Others resemble high-speed straight-aways. The journey to our destination is not always smooth, but the more we let God sit in the driver's seat, the easier will be our ride.
I will plan my journey today with God's help, and my ride will be smooth.
—Kathy Boevink
Our lives in all aspects are a journey toward a destination, one fitting to our purpose, our special gifts, our particular needs as women. Each day contributes to our journey, carrying us closer to our destination. However, we often take a circuitous route. We get stranded or waylaid by our selfish desires, by the intrusion of our controlling ego.
We can reflect on the progress we've made toward our destination, the steps we've taken that have unknowingly contributed to our journey. Our easiest steps have been the ones we took in partnership with God. It's in God's mind that our path is well marked.
We are just where we need to be today. The experiences that we meet are like points on the map of our journey. Some of them are rest stops. Others resemble high-speed straight-aways. The journey to our destination is not always smooth, but the more we let God sit in the driver's seat, the easier will be our ride.
I will plan my journey today with God's help, and my ride will be smooth.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Food for Thought
Where's the Party?
Most of us have early memories of birthday parties - our own and those of other children - and as compulsive overeaters, we probably remember the food more than anything else. For as long as we can recollect, parties have meant eating and drinking. The better and more abundant the food and drink, the better the party; or so we thought.
Maintaining abstinence means that we will attend parties where we do not eat and drink, if what is available is not on our food plan. In order to do this with serenity and enjoyment, we need to redefine our idea of a party. It is no celebration if we break our abstinence and go back to compulsive overeating.
Through this program, we come to see that a party is something more than an occasion for eating and drinking. Enjoying ourselves with other people requires goodwill, mutual attraction, and the effort to communicate with and affirm each other. If these elements are present, there will be a party whether or not there is anything to eat or drink. If these elements are absent, no amount of refreshments will ensure a good time.
Thank You for fun.
Most of us have early memories of birthday parties - our own and those of other children - and as compulsive overeaters, we probably remember the food more than anything else. For as long as we can recollect, parties have meant eating and drinking. The better and more abundant the food and drink, the better the party; or so we thought.
Maintaining abstinence means that we will attend parties where we do not eat and drink, if what is available is not on our food plan. In order to do this with serenity and enjoyment, we need to redefine our idea of a party. It is no celebration if we break our abstinence and go back to compulsive overeating.
Through this program, we come to see that a party is something more than an occasion for eating and drinking. Enjoying ourselves with other people requires goodwill, mutual attraction, and the effort to communicate with and affirm each other. If these elements are present, there will be a party whether or not there is anything to eat or drink. If these elements are absent, no amount of refreshments will ensure a good time.
Thank You for fun.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
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The Language of Letting Go
Accepting Love
Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate.
To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or most of the work. This may mask the situation for a while, but we usually get tired. Then, when we stop doing all the work, we notice there is no relationship, or we're so tired we don't care.
Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It is self-defeating and relationship defeating. It creates the illusion of a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share. Because that does not meet our needs, we ultimately feel victimized.
In our best relationships, we all have temporary periods where one person participates more than the other. This is normal. But as a permanent way of participating in relationships, it leaves us feeling tired, worn out, needy, and angry.'
We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, and then let the relationship find it's own life. Are we doing all the calling? Are we doing all the initiating? Are we doing all the giving? Are we the one talking about feelings and striving for intimacy?
Are we doing all the waiting, the hoping, and the work?
We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be, and it will become what it is meant to be. We do not help that process by trying to control it. We do not help the other person, the relationship, or ourselves by trying to force it or by doing all the work.
Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen. See what happens and strive to understand if that is what you want.
Today, I will stop doing all the work in my relationships. I will give myself and the other person the gift of requiring both people to participate. I will accept the natural level my relationships reach when I do my share and allow the other person to choose what his or her share will be. I can trust my relationships to reach their own level. I do not have to do all the work; I need only do my share.
Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate.
To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or most of the work. This may mask the situation for a while, but we usually get tired. Then, when we stop doing all the work, we notice there is no relationship, or we're so tired we don't care.
Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It is self-defeating and relationship defeating. It creates the illusion of a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share. Because that does not meet our needs, we ultimately feel victimized.
In our best relationships, we all have temporary periods where one person participates more than the other. This is normal. But as a permanent way of participating in relationships, it leaves us feeling tired, worn out, needy, and angry.'
We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, and then let the relationship find it's own life. Are we doing all the calling? Are we doing all the initiating? Are we doing all the giving? Are we the one talking about feelings and striving for intimacy?
Are we doing all the waiting, the hoping, and the work?
We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be, and it will become what it is meant to be. We do not help that process by trying to control it. We do not help the other person, the relationship, or ourselves by trying to force it or by doing all the work.
Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen. See what happens and strive to understand if that is what you want.
Today, I will stop doing all the work in my relationships. I will give myself and the other person the gift of requiring both people to participate. I will accept the natural level my relationships reach when I do my share and allow the other person to choose what his or her share will be. I can trust my relationships to reach their own level. I do not have to do all the work; I need only do my share.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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I must change
Spirit of the Universe, I pray to remember,
No one can make me change.
No one can stop me from changing.
No one really knows how I must change,
Not even I. Not until I start.
Help me remember that it only takes a slight shift
In direction to begin to change my life.
You are reading from the book:
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