The Language of Letting Go: June 6th

The Gift of Readiness

Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
  —Step Six of Al-Anon

We progress to the Sixth Step by working diligently, to the best of our ability, on the first Five Steps. This work readies us for a change of heart, openness to becoming changed by a Power greater than ourselves - God.

The path to this willingness can be long and hard. Many of us have to struggle with a behavior or feeling before we become ready to let it go. We need to see, over and over again, that the coping device that once protected us is no longer useful.

The defects of character referred to in Step Six are old survival behaviors that once helped us cope with people, life, and ourselves. But now they are getting in our way, and it is time to be willing to have them removed.

Trust in this time. Trust that you are being readied to let go of that which is no longer useful. Trust that a change of heart is being worked out in you.

God, help me become ready to let go of my defects of character. Help me know, in my mind and soul, that I am ready to let go of my self defeating behaviors, the blocks and barriers to my life. 

From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.

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At first glance, Step 6 sounds like a no-brainer; "Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character." Who wouldn't want their character defects removed?

However...........we've found comfort and escape in compulsive eating, and, to some degree, joy.  We shut DOWN when we eat, and that is blessed nothingness which is hard to achieve elsewhere. We developed compulsive overeating habits for a reason............as a coping device to protect ourselves.  The behavior has served a useful purpose over the years, but is now causing more distress than it is curing. Old habits, however, die hard.  In fact, they don't want to die off at ALL most of the time.  And worse yet, our instincts keep telling us to eat eat eat when we are feeling distress.

So............at first glance, Step 6 sounds like a no-brainer. But it isn't.  Step 6 is probably THE most difficult step of all, in fact.  I am not always willing to be rid of this character defect.............truth be told, and that's what leads me to relapse.  Sometimes I feel like I derive MORE comfort from overeating than joy from NOT overeating!

God, help me become ready to let go of the behaviors that no longer serve me.  Help me see that character defects are in my way, and no longer serve me.  Help me see that I no longer need protection, because I have You to guide and protect me.