Recovery Meditations: June 17th

VICES AND VIRTUES

"It has been my experience that folks who
have no vices have very few virtues."
Abraham Lincoln

In doing a tenth step daily, I am faced with my character defects -- and yes, even vices. While I may not be compulsively eating, I may over-indulge in any number of other things like talking, whining, or frenetic busy-ness. I have been told that in life I must learn to "take my foot off the gas." I have also been told that I am "too intense" or just "too much." I guess this means I am not moderate in all things (by a mile.)

This thought comforts me in all of this: at least I am in the game. If someone asks for my opinion, he or she will get it ~ straight from the heart or the hip, as they say. If someone needs a favor, I am apt to be excessive in performing it. If someone needs a friend, he or she often gets much more than a casual acquaintance in me. In essence, my being "too much in general" has its good side -- at least I am not asleep at the wheel. I am fully engaged in life.

One day at a time...
I will not forget that my zest for overindulging and overdoing-it-in-general has its counterpart in my zest for goodness and service. I am alive and kicking. I will not hate myself for being fully alive.

~ Q

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"Moderation" is an unfamiliar word to a compulsive person. We are all-or-nothing sorts, either throwing ourselves in 1000% or sitting on the sidelines, watching.  Frenetically moving about, or laying around on the couch like potatoes. Loving or hating, laughing or crying, giving of ourselves fully or turning our cheek.

Many of us have been given the message that we are 'too much'.......but we can take comfort in knowing that there is a good side to 'too much.'  In a world where more is thought to be better, we are definitely MORE!

For today, I will love and accept myself as is.  I will not strive to become someone I'm not, but work on being who I AM and accepting that woman with love.