Recovery Meditations: March 17, 2015
PERSPECTIVE
"Nothing is lost
upon a man who is bent upon growth;
nothing wasted on one
who is always preparing for life.
By keeping eyes, mind,
and heart open to nature, men,
books, experience, and
what he gathers, serves
him at unexpected
moments, is unforeseen.”
Hamilton Wright Mabie
I love to walk in the woods. The silent serenity of shadowed
sunlight; the soft bounce of scattered needles under my feet; and the cool, clear
air breathe peace into my soul.
I’ve long been fascinated by “nurse logs” – those aged,
fallen pines who serve as fertile sustenance for younger, healthy trees.
When I look back at my life I see so much death. I see
wasted years of hiding, lying, pretending -- years of wrapping myself in my
sickness. I have held my disease close to me. At first it seemed to bring
safety, but I came to find that it was actually a death shroud. I wondered how
any good could ever come from my years of pain.
After entering Recovery and working the Program, I have come
to see that Nothing Is Wasted. Every sorrow, every injury, and every failure
have brought me to this fruitful forest of New Life. Had I never suffered, I
would never have found the Serenity that comes from choosing Gratitude. Had my
life been easy, I would not have the appreciation I have gained for each new
day. No one values safety, peace, and growth quite so profoundly as do those
who have lived without them for so very long.
As I keep my mind, heart, and perspective focused on God,
growth, and life, I find that my pain has become a nurse log; rich with all
that is needed to bring life where once was only death.
One day at a time . .
.
I will remember that
nothing is wasted. I will choose to appreciate the pain and wisdom of the
God-given nurse log which feeds me with hope and peace.
~ Lisa V
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Each Day a New Beginning
A woman who is loved always has success.
—Vicki Baum
Being loved, and knowing that we are loved, assures us of our connection to the world outside of ourselves. It affirms us as participants in the bigger picture. And all of us need to know that we count - that what we say and do matters to others--that we are contributing in an important way.
Often we feel unloved, however. And we search for love. We may have begged for love and still didn't feel it. We have probably become very self-centered in our search. Fortunately, the program helps us to give love to others; the paradox is that love is returned, tenfold.
The wonders of love are many. Love is a healing balm for wounds. And it nurtures, both the one loving and the one loved. Love is an energizer. It spurs us on to successes in work and in play. Love multiplies. If we aren't feeling loved, we can love someone else - and love will visit us, too.
We can help the women in our lives find the successes they deserve. The confidence to tackle new situations is packaged in the gift of love. We need to help one another count.
My love of another is a contributing factor in her success. Her loving gratitude will enhance my own endeavors. I will take a moment, today, with a friend who needs my love.
—Vicki Baum
Being loved, and knowing that we are loved, assures us of our connection to the world outside of ourselves. It affirms us as participants in the bigger picture. And all of us need to know that we count - that what we say and do matters to others--that we are contributing in an important way.
Often we feel unloved, however. And we search for love. We may have begged for love and still didn't feel it. We have probably become very self-centered in our search. Fortunately, the program helps us to give love to others; the paradox is that love is returned, tenfold.
The wonders of love are many. Love is a healing balm for wounds. And it nurtures, both the one loving and the one loved. Love is an energizer. It spurs us on to successes in work and in play. Love multiplies. If we aren't feeling loved, we can love someone else - and love will visit us, too.
We can help the women in our lives find the successes they deserve. The confidence to tackle new situations is packaged in the gift of love. We need to help one another count.
My love of another is a contributing factor in her success. Her loving gratitude will enhance my own endeavors. I will take a moment, today, with a friend who needs my love.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Food for Thought
Vulnerability
When we stop doping ourselves with unnecessary food, we become vulnerable. We have been using extra food as a defense against our feelings. Without it, fears and anxieties surface and new energies are released. Instead of retreating into the refrigerator, we can learn day by day how to live with our exposed selves.
Making an overture of friendship to someone we would like to know better involves the risk of rejection. Saying no to a family member when a request conflicts with our program may make us feel guilty. Asking for help when we need it means admitting our weakness. Exposing our needs destroys our facade of self-sufficiency.
To be vulnerable requires courage, but only as we are able to live without the defense of overeating are we able to grow emotionally and spiritually. When we stop turning to food to cover up our feelings and needs, we are able to be more open with other people. We are nourished by them and by the Higher Power who allays our fears and directs our new energies.
May I not fear being vulnerable.
When we stop doping ourselves with unnecessary food, we become vulnerable. We have been using extra food as a defense against our feelings. Without it, fears and anxieties surface and new energies are released. Instead of retreating into the refrigerator, we can learn day by day how to live with our exposed selves.
Making an overture of friendship to someone we would like to know better involves the risk of rejection. Saying no to a family member when a request conflicts with our program may make us feel guilty. Asking for help when we need it means admitting our weakness. Exposing our needs destroys our facade of self-sufficiency.
To be vulnerable requires courage, but only as we are able to live without the defense of overeating are we able to grow emotionally and spiritually. When we stop turning to food to cover up our feelings and needs, we are able to be more open with other people. We are nourished by them and by the Higher Power who allays our fears and directs our new energies.
May I not fear being vulnerable.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation
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The Language of Letting Go
Empowering
You can think. You can feel. You can solve your problems. You can take care of yourself.
You can think. You can feel. You can solve your problems. You can take care of yourself.
Those words have often benefited me more than the most profound and elaborate advice.
How easy it is to fall into the trap of doubting others and ourselves.
When someone tells us about a problem, what is our reaction? Do we believe we need to solve it for the person? Do we believe that that person's future rests on our ability to advise him or her? That's standing on shaky ground - not the stuff of which recovery is made.
When someone is struggling through a feeling, or a morass of feelings, what is our reaction? That the person will never survive that experience? That it's not okay for someone to feel? That he or she will never get through this intact?
When a person is faced with the task of assuming responsibility for their life and behaviors, what is our response? That the person can't do that? I must do it myself to save him or her from dissipating into ashes? From crumbling? From failing?
What is our reaction to ourselves when we encounter a problem, a feeling, or when we face the prospect of assuming responsibility for ourselves?
Do we believe in others and ourselves? Do we give power to people - including ourselves - and their abilities? Or do we give the power to the problem, the feeling, or the irresponsibility?
We can learn to check ourselves out. We can learn to think, and consider our response, before we respond. "I'm sorry you're having that problem. I know you can figure out a solution. Sounds like you've got some feelings going on. I know you'll work through them and come out on the other side."
Each of us is responsible for ourselves. That does not mean we don't care. It does not mean a cold, calculated withdrawal of our support from others. It means we learn to love and support people in ways that work. It means we learn to love and support ourselves in ways that work. It means that we connect with friends who love and support us in ways that work.
To believe in people, to believe in each persons inherent ability to think, feel, solve problems, and take care of themselves is a great gift we can give and receive from others.
Today, I will strive to give and receive support that is pure and empowering. I will work at believing in myself and others - and our mutual abilities to be competent at dealing with feelings, solving problems, and taking responsibility for ourselves.
How easy it is to fall into the trap of doubting others and ourselves.
When someone tells us about a problem, what is our reaction? Do we believe we need to solve it for the person? Do we believe that that person's future rests on our ability to advise him or her? That's standing on shaky ground - not the stuff of which recovery is made.
When someone is struggling through a feeling, or a morass of feelings, what is our reaction? That the person will never survive that experience? That it's not okay for someone to feel? That he or she will never get through this intact?
When a person is faced with the task of assuming responsibility for their life and behaviors, what is our response? That the person can't do that? I must do it myself to save him or her from dissipating into ashes? From crumbling? From failing?
What is our reaction to ourselves when we encounter a problem, a feeling, or when we face the prospect of assuming responsibility for ourselves?
Do we believe in others and ourselves? Do we give power to people - including ourselves - and their abilities? Or do we give the power to the problem, the feeling, or the irresponsibility?
We can learn to check ourselves out. We can learn to think, and consider our response, before we respond. "I'm sorry you're having that problem. I know you can figure out a solution. Sounds like you've got some feelings going on. I know you'll work through them and come out on the other side."
Each of us is responsible for ourselves. That does not mean we don't care. It does not mean a cold, calculated withdrawal of our support from others. It means we learn to love and support people in ways that work. It means we learn to love and support ourselves in ways that work. It means that we connect with friends who love and support us in ways that work.
To believe in people, to believe in each persons inherent ability to think, feel, solve problems, and take care of themselves is a great gift we can give and receive from others.
Today, I will strive to give and receive support that is pure and empowering. I will work at believing in myself and others - and our mutual abilities to be competent at dealing with feelings, solving problems, and taking responsibility for ourselves.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation
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Today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
In real love you want the other person's good. In romantic love, you want the other person.
--Margaret Anderson
The expression of real love is so easy between grandparents and children - and between good friends it passes effortlessly. But why is it so hard to share real love with a spouse or lover? Why, instead, do we want to possess them? And from them we dream of selfless devotion. Yet neither possession nor devotion guarantees the security we long for.
Real love is not selfish; it frees both the giver and the receiver. Knowing we're loved sustains our hearts and diminishes our difficulties. It doesn't bind us, yet paradoxically it bonds our hearts. These encouragements to grow, to change, to dare to depart if it's for our own good, are expressions of real love. Real love is never ownership, only stewardship of this moment's experiences.
Let's be gentle with one another, and love fully with trust, as a child loves a grandmother.
In real love you want the other person's good. In romantic love, you want the other person.
--Margaret Anderson
The expression of real love is so easy between grandparents and children - and between good friends it passes effortlessly. But why is it so hard to share real love with a spouse or lover? Why, instead, do we want to possess them? And from them we dream of selfless devotion. Yet neither possession nor devotion guarantees the security we long for.
Real love is not selfish; it frees both the giver and the receiver. Knowing we're loved sustains our hearts and diminishes our difficulties. It doesn't bind us, yet paradoxically it bonds our hearts. These encouragements to grow, to change, to dare to depart if it's for our own good, are expressions of real love. Real love is never ownership, only stewardship of this moment's experiences.
Let's be gentle with one another, and love fully with trust, as a child loves a grandmother.
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