Recovery Meditations: March 10, 2015
THE WHOLE PICTURE
“It should be pointed
out that physical treatment
is but a small part of
the picture.”
Big Book Alcoholics of
Anonymous; Page 143
Looking around a gallery recently my friend and I were
looking at a mosaic picture. We pondered on what we thought of it, and each of
us had our own ideas. Then as we chatted a thought popped into my head. Now
this doesn’t happen often, so make the most of it.
The mosaic, of course, is made up of lots of tiny tiles,
each one seemingly insignificant on its own. In fact if you found one in the
street, you probably wouldn’t look at it twice, never mind pick it up. Yet
together with all the other tiny tiles, pieced together it forms an unusual and
beautiful work of art. I don’t expect that all of the tiles are perfect, but
together they are whole. Together they appear to be as one in unison with each
other.
Then came the second thought (yes, two in one day). Some
days for me are pretty awful. I feel sick, or saddened. I turn on the TV and
the news is all depressing stuff, and I think, where is HP while all this is
happening? A few years ago, I lost my baby and nearly my own life. Where was my
HP then? Losing my nephew at age 8 a few years later, I really doubted that any
God of anyone’s understanding could help me with a weight problem.
But today I see the wonderful days, the glowing wonderful
comforting days that make life worthwhile. Who am I to say that this life I’m
living is good or bad? Only HP has the ‘whole mosaic’ picture of Life. Not just
my life, but my life touching another life. The events happening in the world –
again, only HP sees the whole picture. He has the lid of the jigsaw puzzle with
the main picture on it; we only have one piece, just like the tile.
After I lost the baby, HP helped the surgeons to heal me. I
certainly didn’t feel worthy; in fact I felt at the time that I wasn’t even
good enough to die. Yet HP has stuck by me and has given me so much. I doubt
I’ll ever know whose life or lives I may have touched as a result of me being
saved, but it doesn’t matter. HP knows. HP cares.
One Day at a Time . .
.
I must remember that
you and I are one in the eyes of our Creator. Not one of us is less than, or
more than each other. Together we are one. Together we watch HP work miracles
in our lives. Together, we are perfect as long as we are under HP’s direction.
Mind boggling isn’t it?
~ Marlene
********************************************************
Each Day a New Beginning
It is healthier to see the good points of others than to analyze our own bad ones.
—Francoise Sagan
Looking for the good in others is good for one's soul. Self-respect, self-love grows each time we openly acknowledge another's admirable qualities. Comparisons we make of ourselves with others, focusing on how we fail to measure up (another woman is prettier, thinner, more intelligent, has a better sense of humor, attracts people, and on and on) is a common experience. And we come away from the comparison feeling generally inadequate and unloving toward the other woman.
It is a spiritual truth that our love for and praise of others will improve our own self-image. It will rub off on us, so-to-speak. An improved self-image diminishes whatever bad qualities one has imagined.
Praise softens. Criticism hardens. We can become all that we want to become. We can draw the love of others to us as we more willingly offer love and praise. We have an opportunity to help one another as we help ourselves grow in the self-love that is so necessary to the successful living of each day.
I will see the good points in others today. And I will give praise.
—Francoise Sagan
Looking for the good in others is good for one's soul. Self-respect, self-love grows each time we openly acknowledge another's admirable qualities. Comparisons we make of ourselves with others, focusing on how we fail to measure up (another woman is prettier, thinner, more intelligent, has a better sense of humor, attracts people, and on and on) is a common experience. And we come away from the comparison feeling generally inadequate and unloving toward the other woman.
It is a spiritual truth that our love for and praise of others will improve our own self-image. It will rub off on us, so-to-speak. An improved self-image diminishes whatever bad qualities one has imagined.
Praise softens. Criticism hardens. We can become all that we want to become. We can draw the love of others to us as we more willingly offer love and praise. We have an opportunity to help one another as we help ourselves grow in the self-love that is so necessary to the successful living of each day.
I will see the good points in others today. And I will give praise.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
**********************************************************************
Food for Thought
Fellowship
Compulsive overeating is a lonely activity. The more we eat, the more we isolate ourselves from other people and the more alienated and different we feel. We need people, but we do not like ourselves, and we fear that others will reject us.
What a relief to find a group of other people with the same problems and feelings! We are accepted, understood, and loved. We find that we are not so different after all.
The OA fellowship exudes a sense of warmth and support. It is a safe place to put aside masks and express honest feelings. There is healing and strength. Meetings and retreats have given many of us a deeper experience of belonging than we have found anywhere else. We are all accepted as we are and where we are in our personal development.
No one tells us what to do in OA. Through the fellowship, we learn what has worked for others and we find relief from our loneliness.
Bless our fellowship, Lord.
Compulsive overeating is a lonely activity. The more we eat, the more we isolate ourselves from other people and the more alienated and different we feel. We need people, but we do not like ourselves, and we fear that others will reject us.
What a relief to find a group of other people with the same problems and feelings! We are accepted, understood, and loved. We find that we are not so different after all.
The OA fellowship exudes a sense of warmth and support. It is a safe place to put aside masks and express honest feelings. There is healing and strength. Meetings and retreats have given many of us a deeper experience of belonging than we have found anywhere else. We are all accepted as we are and where we are in our personal development.
No one tells us what to do in OA. Through the fellowship, we learn what has worked for others and we find relief from our loneliness.
Bless our fellowship, Lord.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
**********************************************************************
The Language of Letting Go
Living with Families
I was forty-six years old before I finally admitted to myself and someone else that my grandfather always managed to make me feel guilty, angry, and controlled.
—Anonymous
We may love and care about our family very much. Family members may love and care about us. But interacting with some members may be a real trigger to our codependency - sometimes to a deep abyss of shame, rage, anger, guilt, and helplessness.
It can be difficult to achieve detachment, or an emotional level, with certain family members. It can be difficult to separate their issues from ours. It can be difficult to own our power.
Difficult, but not impossible.
The first step is awareness and acceptance - simple acknowledgment, without guilt, of our feelings and thoughts. We do not have to blame our family members. We do not have to blame or shame ourselves. Acceptance is the goal - acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do to take care of ourselves with that person. We can become free of the patterns of the past. We are recovering. Progress is the goal.
Today, Higher Power, help me be patient with myself as I learn how to apply recovery behaviors with family members. Help me strive today for awareness and acceptance.
I was forty-six years old before I finally admitted to myself and someone else that my grandfather always managed to make me feel guilty, angry, and controlled.
—Anonymous
We may love and care about our family very much. Family members may love and care about us. But interacting with some members may be a real trigger to our codependency - sometimes to a deep abyss of shame, rage, anger, guilt, and helplessness.
It can be difficult to achieve detachment, or an emotional level, with certain family members. It can be difficult to separate their issues from ours. It can be difficult to own our power.
Difficult, but not impossible.
The first step is awareness and acceptance - simple acknowledgment, without guilt, of our feelings and thoughts. We do not have to blame our family members. We do not have to blame or shame ourselves. Acceptance is the goal - acceptance and freedom to choose what we want and need to do to take care of ourselves with that person. We can become free of the patterns of the past. We are recovering. Progress is the goal.
Today, Higher Power, help me be patient with myself as I learn how to apply recovery behaviors with family members. Help me strive today for awareness and acceptance.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation
********************************************************************
Today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Accepting Love
Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate.
To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or most of the work. Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It is self-defeating and relationship defeating. It creates the illusion of a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share. Because that does not meet our needs, we ultimately feel victimized.
We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, and then let the relationship find its own life. Are we doing all the calling? Are we doing all the initiating? Are we doing all the giving? Are we the one talking about feelings and striving for intimacy?
Are we doing all the waiting, the hoping, and the work?
We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be, and it will become what it is meant to be. We do not help that process by trying to control it. We do not help ourselves, the other person, or the relationship by trying to force it or by doing all the work.
Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen. See what happens and strive to understand if that is what you want.
Today, I will stop doing all the work in my relationships. I will give myself and the other person the gift of requiring both people to participate. I do not have to do all the work; I need only do my share.
Accepting Love
Many of us have worked too hard to make relationships work; sometimes those relationships didn't have a chance because the other person was unavailable or refused to participate.
To compensate for the other person's unavailability, we worked too hard. We may have done all or most of the work. Doing all the work in a relationship is not loving, giving, or caring. It is self-defeating and relationship defeating. It creates the illusion of a relationship when in fact there may be no relationship. It enables the other person to be irresponsible for his or her share. Because that does not meet our needs, we ultimately feel victimized.
We can learn to participate a reasonable amount, and then let the relationship find its own life. Are we doing all the calling? Are we doing all the initiating? Are we doing all the giving? Are we the one talking about feelings and striving for intimacy?
Are we doing all the waiting, the hoping, and the work?
We can let go. If the relationship is meant to be, it will be, and it will become what it is meant to be. We do not help that process by trying to control it. We do not help ourselves, the other person, or the relationship by trying to force it or by doing all the work.
Let it be. Wait and see. Stop worrying about making it happen. See what happens and strive to understand if that is what you want.
Today, I will stop doing all the work in my relationships. I will give myself and the other person the gift of requiring both people to participate. I do not have to do all the work; I need only do my share.
You are reading from the book:
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.