THE TITANIC
“Men at some time are masters of their fates.”
William Shakespeare
Our early days in OA can be compared to being a passenger on the Titanic. As we took our beloved and wonderfully-powerful first three steps, we were taking a voyage. In Step One we realized we were on the Titanic and that we were doomed. In Step Two we spotted a lifeboat. And in Step Three we took our seats in the lifeboat.
My voyage began with Step One when I realized the connection between the weight I was carrying and some health issues I had last year. I had developed "pitting edema" in both ankles. That was a sign of congestive heart failure. I was on the Titanic! In addition to my physical health condition, I discovered that my inner-health was also challenged. I had lived my life filled with resentments and negative thinking which ate at my very being. I had lost much of my spiritual strength and was in need of spiritual renewal. I was indeed a passenger on my own personal Titanic.
My voyage continued with Step Two. I can't even remember how I found The Recovery Group online, but I know that my Higher Power must have brought me here. Though I didn't believe at that time what the fellowship said in the meetings, I "acted as if" I believed my Higher Power could relieve me of these horrible compulsions to overeat and to live in resentment and negativity. That was all it took. I had spotted the lifeboat and was "acting as if" I believed it had come for me.
I was being changed. My early days of abstinence were difficult, but achievable. I had gotten into the lifeboat. I will always remember where I was when I suddenly realized that God had relieved me of the compulsion to eat between meals and at night. That realization had a huge impact on me. That day I took my seat on the lifeboat. I have been blessed with so much recovery. The ride I am on in this lifeboat isn't a free ride; it requires that I work this program on a daily basis. But when I consider the alternative, I love the ride I am on and I truly cherish the passengers with whom I am sharing this boat!
One day at a time...
I will cherish the lifeboat that this program has given me.
~ Karen A.
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Each Day a New Beginning
That reality of life and living -
movement from one place to another either in a project or in a state of
mind - does not conform with what we imagine or expect or think we
deserve so we often leave things hanging unfinished or unstarted.
--Sandra Edwards
Being dissatisfied, discontented, with the experiences life gives us forever hampers our growth. Reality is not our bane but our gift. The particular reality perceived by any one of us is of special significance because in that reality are our lessons - the very lessons that will awaken us to the awareness that what life offers is just what we deserve, and more.
It's our interpretation of life's realities that is at fault. But as we grow, spiritually, the clouds will disappear. We'll come to understand the interplay between our realities. And we'll willingly move ahead, fulfilling our part in life's bigger picture.
Sometimes all I can do is trust that all is well, even though it's not as I had hoped. On bad days I need only to reflect on the past to know that I am moving in the right direction
--Sandra Edwards
Being dissatisfied, discontented, with the experiences life gives us forever hampers our growth. Reality is not our bane but our gift. The particular reality perceived by any one of us is of special significance because in that reality are our lessons - the very lessons that will awaken us to the awareness that what life offers is just what we deserve, and more.
It's our interpretation of life's realities that is at fault. But as we grow, spiritually, the clouds will disappear. We'll come to understand the interplay between our realities. And we'll willingly move ahead, fulfilling our part in life's bigger picture.
Sometimes all I can do is trust that all is well, even though it's not as I had hoped. On bad days I need only to reflect on the past to know that I am moving in the right direction
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Food for Thought
Friends Are For Helping
Now that we have found our place in a fellowship of sympathetic friends, we no longer need to be lonely. We have friends who understand us, even though we may only know their first names. Since we are all compulsive overeaters, we share similar experiences and feelings.
Reaching out to others in the program helps us to better understand and accept ourselves. The new life OA gives us needs to be shared in order to be kept. Calling newcomers, sharing transportation, keeping in touch with someone who is having trouble - these contacts strengthen our defenses against old habits and prevent us from slipping back into loneliness. The friends we make through OA are related to us by a deep spiritual bond.
When we are in trouble, we should not be too proud to ask for help. We cannot control this disease by ourselves. Our phone call to another member in time of difficulty is not an imposition but another link in the chain of mutual support.
May I be a giver and receiver of help and friendship.
Now that we have found our place in a fellowship of sympathetic friends, we no longer need to be lonely. We have friends who understand us, even though we may only know their first names. Since we are all compulsive overeaters, we share similar experiences and feelings.
Reaching out to others in the program helps us to better understand and accept ourselves. The new life OA gives us needs to be shared in order to be kept. Calling newcomers, sharing transportation, keeping in touch with someone who is having trouble - these contacts strengthen our defenses against old habits and prevent us from slipping back into loneliness. The friends we make through OA are related to us by a deep spiritual bond.
When we are in trouble, we should not be too proud to ask for help. We cannot control this disease by ourselves. Our phone call to another member in time of difficulty is not an imposition but another link in the chain of mutual support.
May I be a giver and receiver of help and friendship.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
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The Language of Letting Go
What If?
I was talking to a friend one day about something I planned to do. Actually, I was worrying about how one particular person might react to what I intended to do.
"What if he doesn't handle it very well?" I asked.
"Then," my friend replied, "you're going to have to handle it well."
What if's can make us crazy. They put control over our life in someone else's hands. What if's are a sign that we have reverted to thinking that people have to react in a particular way for us to continue on our course.
What if's are also a clue that we may be wondering whether we can trust ourselves and our Higher Power to do what's best for us. These are shreds of codependent ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, and they signal fear.
The reactions, feelings, likes or dislikes of others don't have to control our behaviors, feelings, and direction. We don't need to control how others react to our choices. We can trust ourselves, with help from a Higher Power, to handle any outcome - even the most uncomfortable. And, my friend, we can trust ourselves to handle it well.
Today, I will not worry about other people's reactions or events outside of my control. Instead, I will focus on my reactions. I will handle my life well today and trust that, tomorrow, I can do the same.
I was talking to a friend one day about something I planned to do. Actually, I was worrying about how one particular person might react to what I intended to do.
"What if he doesn't handle it very well?" I asked.
"Then," my friend replied, "you're going to have to handle it well."
What if's can make us crazy. They put control over our life in someone else's hands. What if's are a sign that we have reverted to thinking that people have to react in a particular way for us to continue on our course.
What if's are also a clue that we may be wondering whether we can trust ourselves and our Higher Power to do what's best for us. These are shreds of codependent ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, and they signal fear.
The reactions, feelings, likes or dislikes of others don't have to control our behaviors, feelings, and direction. We don't need to control how others react to our choices. We can trust ourselves, with help from a Higher Power, to handle any outcome - even the most uncomfortable. And, my friend, we can trust ourselves to handle it well.
Today, I will not worry about other people's reactions or events outside of my control. Instead, I will focus on my reactions. I will handle my life well today and trust that, tomorrow, I can do the same.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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If one is going to be truthful, one has to be very tender.
--Florida Scott-Maxwell
Honesty is always the best policy, right? We glibly recite that saying, but it's important to reevaluate its meaning when we are eager to correct or direct the actions of the other people. If being honest will unnecessarily harm them, perhaps being silent is better.
The program is helping us restructure our lives. We discover that many former, automatic responses no longer fit who we desire to be. That means we have to try new, less-practiced behaviors, such as being honest without being harsh or critical.
Learning tenderness is possible. With the help of this program and one another, we are learning to express the acceptance and love that have been given to us by our Higher Power. Giving away what we have been given is sharing the truth absolutely.
I will not hurt anyone today by any comment. I will truthfully share the love and acceptance I have been given.
You are reading from the book:
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