Food for Thought: November 29th

Flexibility

If we examine our behavior patterns when we were eating compulsively, we usually find that they were quite rigid. Our mental obsession and physical addiction kept us bound in repetitious behavior, which permitted very little spontaneity. With so much time and energy tied up in eating, we had very little flexibility. Most of our free time was used to support our addiction in one way or another.

As we recover, we may find ourselves threatened by unstructured time or by impromptu changes in schedule. An unexpected holiday can bring on feelings of emptiness or boredom. Changed plans can leave us feeling confused and unsettled. Without a firm routine, we may become uneasy.

Remembering that abstinence is the most important thing in our life without exception can provide an anchor when we are required to be flexible. As long as we remain abstinent, we are free to alter schedules and plans according to preference and convenience. Flexibility and spontaneity are possible when abstinence is firm.

Show me how to be flexible.

From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.

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I practiced my addiction(s) "to the exclusion of all else."  I had no time for anything or anybody but my addiction; it took up all of my time and mental capacity.  My free time was consumed with obsession; what to eat, when to eat it, how to shop for the food, how to cook it; etc.  My mind was closed........I was unteachable..........inflexible, and living inside of my own head. Very little existed outside of that narrow field of vision: Me Me Me.  Addiction could be described as the ultimate selfishness, the way I see it.  There's no room for anyone or anything else but Me Myself & I.

The greatest gift I've been given is one of Routine.  My days are structured, my food intake is pre-planned & pre-measured, and the routine is what keeps me feeling safe & secure within the limits of my fenced-in Recovery yard.  So yes, a change in that routine CAN bring on feelings of fear or boredom; changed plans can leave me feeling out of sorts completely.  It took me several years of sobriety before I was able to feel comfortable with change.  And, to this day, I am still not 100% ok with it.  I function much better within the parameters of what's known........what's unknown can't be 100% managed.  During those times of change is when I really need to rely on faith in my Higher Power. 

When I keep abstinence & sobriety at the tippy TOP of my priority list is when I CAN function in any situation I find myself in.  If my schedule changes, I don't need to freak out and question my ability to stay the course.  I CAN trust myself to manage my program no matter what.  With God in my back pocket, and abstinence #1, how can I go wrong?

For today, I agree to be mentally flexible, teachable, and open to new ideas.