Recovery
Meditations: June 13th
LONERS
"I never found a
companion
that was so
companionable as solitude."
Henry David Thoreau
When I am physically, emotionally or spiritually unfit, I
find myself isolating. On the other hand, I also find there are differences
between solitude and isolation. Granted, sometimes those differences are
subtle; nevertheless, they are different. It only takes abstinence to clearly
see the difference and unless one has experienced that state, I doubt if this
can really be understood.
Isolation shuts us off, not only from other people, but from
God Himself. We tuck in our tails and busy ourselves with whatever comes to
mind and our sole purpose is to avoid human contact. Isolation is not good.
When I am isolating, I feel shame and I risk overeating. While I may not do
this consciously, I run a risk of depression. I also feel guilty and the
negative thoughts run amok.
Solitude is not hiding from others as isolation can be. On
the contrary, I can nourish myself by being in solitude. Because I have a
creative nature, solitude allows me the freedom to explore and be as creative
as God intends for me to be. If I don't allow myself solitude on occasion, I am
in essence damming up the gifts God has given me. These gifts need the freedom
of solitude to make them materialize and be all they can be. Because I have
experienced the disease of compulsive eating and all the manifestations of this
disease, I can clearly see the differences between solitude and isolation. I
learned that I can be in a crowd of people and still be isolating. I can also
be in a crowd of people and be in solitude. If I have spiritually and
emotionally shut down, I would be going through the motions but deep down in my
soul I would know that I'm isolating. When my spirit is free and I am working
the program, one might glance at me and see me drifting off to a room where
there is a piano and recapturing a moment of music ... or staring out a window
at a view so beautiful that it takes my breath away ... or sipping a cup of
coffee and observing those around me but not actively participating in their
small talk but wondering who they really are.
One day at a time...
let me remove myself from the pain of the seclusion of isolation and substitute
the wonderful state of solitude that brings me such great joy and peace of
mind.
~ Mari
*****************************************************
Each Day a New Beginning
Everyday . . . life confronts us with new problems to be solved which force us to adjust our old programs accordingly.
—Dr. Ann Faraday
Facing the day straight on is occasionally difficult to do. There are those days we feel like crawling under the covers and staying there, certain that we can't handle whatever might be asked of us. Maybe today is one of those days. Perhaps we feel 12 years old, instead of 42. To consciously behave like a responsible 42-year-old is out of the question. Acting "as if" is the next best thing, the program tells us, and it is.
Acting "as if" also comes in handy when only a minor kink interferes with the day's progression. Most problems don't fit an easy solution or a familiar one. However, most problems are dispensed with by seeing them as opportunities for creative response, calmly seeking guidance and then moving ahead slowly, being aware of the effects of our actions.
Today, and every day, I will have an opportunity to think creatively and to rely on my inner guide. Instead of dreading the unfamiliar, I will be glad for it. It's moving me ever closer to understanding life's mysteries.
—Dr. Ann Faraday
Facing the day straight on is occasionally difficult to do. There are those days we feel like crawling under the covers and staying there, certain that we can't handle whatever might be asked of us. Maybe today is one of those days. Perhaps we feel 12 years old, instead of 42. To consciously behave like a responsible 42-year-old is out of the question. Acting "as if" is the next best thing, the program tells us, and it is.
Acting "as if" also comes in handy when only a minor kink interferes with the day's progression. Most problems don't fit an easy solution or a familiar one. However, most problems are dispensed with by seeing them as opportunities for creative response, calmly seeking guidance and then moving ahead slowly, being aware of the effects of our actions.
Today, and every day, I will have an opportunity to think creatively and to rely on my inner guide. Instead of dreading the unfamiliar, I will be glad for it. It's moving me ever closer to understanding life's mysteries.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
***************************************************************
Food for Thought
Research
In OA meetings, we sometimes hear reports of "research" done by a member who breaks abstinence in order to find out whether he or she is still a compulsive overeater. The experiment invariably proves that once a compulsive overeater, always a compulsive overeater. Among the results are remorse, regained weight, and weakened control.
It has been said that we are like someone who has lost a leg. We do not grow a new one. We can, nevertheless, learn to live with our disability if we are willing to abstain and follow the OA program. Most of us find that we cannot go back to eating binge foods moderately, but we can avoid them. We are like the alcoholic who can lead a normal, satisfying life as long as he or she stays away from alcohol.
Further research is not necessary. By accepting our need for a disciplined eating plan, we can benefit from the experience of those who have been in the program longer than we.
May I remember that further research is unnecessary.
In OA meetings, we sometimes hear reports of "research" done by a member who breaks abstinence in order to find out whether he or she is still a compulsive overeater. The experiment invariably proves that once a compulsive overeater, always a compulsive overeater. Among the results are remorse, regained weight, and weakened control.
It has been said that we are like someone who has lost a leg. We do not grow a new one. We can, nevertheless, learn to live with our disability if we are willing to abstain and follow the OA program. Most of us find that we cannot go back to eating binge foods moderately, but we can avoid them. We are like the alcoholic who can lead a normal, satisfying life as long as he or she stays away from alcohol.
Further research is not necessary. By accepting our need for a disciplined eating plan, we can benefit from the experience of those who have been in the program longer than we.
May I remember that further research is unnecessary.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
****************************************************************
The Language of Letting Go
Hanging on to Old Relationships
We want to travel baggage-free on this journey. It makes the trip easier.
Some of the baggage we can let go of is lingering feelings and unfinished business with past relationships: anger, resentments, feelings of victimization, hurt, or longing.
If we have not put closure on a relationship, if we cannot walk away in peace, we have not yet learned our lesson. That may mean we will have to have another go around with that lesson before we are ready to move on.
We may want to do a Fourth Step (a written inventory of our relationships) and a Fifth Step (an admission of our wrongs). What feelings did we leave with in a particular relationship? Are we still carrying those feelings around? Do we want the heaviness and impact of that baggage on our behavior today?
Are we still feeling victimized, rejected, or bitter about something that happened two, five, ten, or even twenty years ago?
It may be time to let it go. It may be time to open ourselves to the true lesson from that experience. It may be time to put past relationships to rest, so we are free to go on to new, more rewarding experiences.
We can choose to live in the past, or we can choose to finish our old business from the past and open ourselves to the beauty of today.
Let go of your baggage from past relationships.
Today, I will open myself to the cleansing and healing process that will put closure on yesterday and open me to the best today, and tomorrow, has to offer in my relationships.
We want to travel baggage-free on this journey. It makes the trip easier.
Some of the baggage we can let go of is lingering feelings and unfinished business with past relationships: anger, resentments, feelings of victimization, hurt, or longing.
If we have not put closure on a relationship, if we cannot walk away in peace, we have not yet learned our lesson. That may mean we will have to have another go around with that lesson before we are ready to move on.
We may want to do a Fourth Step (a written inventory of our relationships) and a Fifth Step (an admission of our wrongs). What feelings did we leave with in a particular relationship? Are we still carrying those feelings around? Do we want the heaviness and impact of that baggage on our behavior today?
Are we still feeling victimized, rejected, or bitter about something that happened two, five, ten, or even twenty years ago?
It may be time to let it go. It may be time to open ourselves to the true lesson from that experience. It may be time to put past relationships to rest, so we are free to go on to new, more rewarding experiences.
We can choose to live in the past, or we can choose to finish our old business from the past and open ourselves to the beauty of today.
Let go of your baggage from past relationships.
Today, I will open myself to the cleansing and healing process that will put closure on yesterday and open me to the best today, and tomorrow, has to offer in my relationships.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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Today's thought from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Many of us achieve only the semblance of communication with others; what we say is often not contingent on what the other has just said, and neither of us is aware that we are not communicating.
--Desy Safan-Gerard
When we don't listen fully to each other, when we don't revere the Spirit within others that's trying to talk to us, we destroy the connection that wants to be made between our Spirits. Our inner selves have messages to give and messages to receive for the good of all. Our ego selves often keep us from hearing the very words that would unravel a problem in our lives.
How hard it is, how often, to be still and to fully listen to the words, rather than the person. How much more familiar it is to filter the message with our own ongoing inner dialogue - our own ongoing continual assessment of another's personhood at the very time our higher power is trying to reach us through them.
There really are no wasted words. Messages are everywhere. We can learn to listen.
I will hear just what I need to hear today. I will open myself fully to the words.
Many of us achieve only the semblance of communication with others; what we say is often not contingent on what the other has just said, and neither of us is aware that we are not communicating.
--Desy Safan-Gerard
When we don't listen fully to each other, when we don't revere the Spirit within others that's trying to talk to us, we destroy the connection that wants to be made between our Spirits. Our inner selves have messages to give and messages to receive for the good of all. Our ego selves often keep us from hearing the very words that would unravel a problem in our lives.
How hard it is, how often, to be still and to fully listen to the words, rather than the person. How much more familiar it is to filter the message with our own ongoing inner dialogue - our own ongoing continual assessment of another's personhood at the very time our higher power is trying to reach us through them.
There really are no wasted words. Messages are everywhere. We can learn to listen.
I will hear just what I need to hear today. I will open myself fully to the words.
You are reading from the book:
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