Recovery
Meditations: June 29th
RESENTMENT
”When you hold
resentment toward another, you are bound
to that person or
condition by an emotional link that is
stronger than steel.
Forgiveness is the only way to
dissolve that link and
get free.”
Catherine Ponder
I once had a situation in which someone I was acquainted
with said unkind things about my weight and verbally attacked my spouse in
front of my daughter. I worried and revisited the situation over and over for
many years until the anger turned to resentment and became a major, entrenched
grudge. Because so many of my eating issues stem from emotional ones, this
would drive me to eat in an effort to dull, numb and forget my anger. That
didn't work ~ the eating didn't stop that anger from turning into resentment.
When I would complain about this situation to a friend, she
told me that I had to stop allowing that person to "rent space in my
mind." I came to realize that I had allowed -- and even nurtured -- a
negative energetic link to that person and situation. I couldn't let go of
resentment until I was willing to take the needed steps in program and to
forgive. Forgiving doesn't mean I didn't learn anything from the situation, and
I haven't forgotten the unkind words. But I learned that I needed to be more
cautious in my dealings with this type of individual. I learned I can't
surround myself with people who are overly-negative and say poisonous things
without accepting any accountability for their actions. I have learned that I
can be accountable for mine, and that I no longer have to allow myself to be
bound by an emotional link to the situation.
One day at a time...
I will ask my Higher
Power to help me to learn to forgive and forget. With the help of my Higher
Power, I will let go of unnecessary baggage that causes resentment.
~ Deb B.
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Each Day a New Beginning
I am convinced, the longer I live,
that life and its blessings are not so entirely unjustly distributed
(as) when we are suffering greatly we are so inclined to suppose.
—Mary Todd Lincoln
Self-pity is a parasite that feeds on itself. Many of us are inclined toward self-pity, not allowing for the balance of life's natural tragedies. We will face good and bad times-and they will pass. With certainty they will pass.
The attitude, "Why me?" hints at the little compassion we generally feel for others' suffering. Our empathy with others, even our awareness of their suffering, is generally minimal. We are much too involved in our own. Were we less self-centered, we'd see that blessings and tragedies visit us all, in equal amounts. Some people respond to their blessings with equanimity, and they quietly remove the sting from their tragedies. We can learn to do both.
Recovery is learning new responses, feeling and behaving in healthier ways. Self-pity need not catch us. We can always feel it coming on. And we can let it go.
Self-pity may beckon, today. Fortunately, I have learned I have other choices.
—Mary Todd Lincoln
Self-pity is a parasite that feeds on itself. Many of us are inclined toward self-pity, not allowing for the balance of life's natural tragedies. We will face good and bad times-and they will pass. With certainty they will pass.
The attitude, "Why me?" hints at the little compassion we generally feel for others' suffering. Our empathy with others, even our awareness of their suffering, is generally minimal. We are much too involved in our own. Were we less self-centered, we'd see that blessings and tragedies visit us all, in equal amounts. Some people respond to their blessings with equanimity, and they quietly remove the sting from their tragedies. We can learn to do both.
Recovery is learning new responses, feeling and behaving in healthier ways. Self-pity need not catch us. We can always feel it coming on. And we can let it go.
Self-pity may beckon, today. Fortunately, I have learned I have other choices.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation
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Food for Thought
The Joy of Abstaining
For someone who has suffered the physical, emotional, and spiritual anguish of compulsive overeating, abstaining is not a restriction but a release. We are released from indigestion, lethargy, fat, and the torment of never-satisfied craving.
If we dwell on the negative aspects of abstaining, such as the foods we are not eating, we will be unhappy. If we continue to concentrate on food, rather than on life and the spirit, we will find it difficult to abstain. The OA program gives us a new set of priorities and opens the door to new life if we are willing to leave our preoccupation with food outside and walk in.
It is good to feel full of energy rather than full of food. It is satisfying to discover new ways to give. There is deep joy in day-by-day spiritual growth. All of these joys become ours through abstaining.
We give thanks for the joy of abstaining.
For someone who has suffered the physical, emotional, and spiritual anguish of compulsive overeating, abstaining is not a restriction but a release. We are released from indigestion, lethargy, fat, and the torment of never-satisfied craving.
If we dwell on the negative aspects of abstaining, such as the foods we are not eating, we will be unhappy. If we continue to concentrate on food, rather than on life and the spirit, we will find it difficult to abstain. The OA program gives us a new set of priorities and opens the door to new life if we are willing to leave our preoccupation with food outside and walk in.
It is good to feel full of energy rather than full of food. It is satisfying to discover new ways to give. There is deep joy in day-by-day spiritual growth. All of these joys become ours through abstaining.
We give thanks for the joy of abstaining.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Today's thought from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Money may not buy happiness, but it can buy the type of misery you can live with.
-- Ziggy
We think to ourselves, "Wouldn't it be nice not to have to worry about the washer breaking down?" "Wouldn't it be nice to drive a reliable car?" "Wouldn't it be nice to take a Caribbean vacation every year?" "Wouldn't it be nice not to have to work?" If we had money, we think, at least we wouldn't have to worry so much and could live comfortably.
True. Money buys external comfort - plush couches and chairs, luxury cars, beautiful environments. Money buys what comforts and soothes us on the outside. And, if we're going to be miserable anyway, why not do it in comfort?
We remember that regardless of our surroundings, misery is misery. Unless we have the right attitude, we'll find something wrong with whatever we have or don't have. When we work on improving our inner world - on alleviating the real cause of our misery - we know true comfort. We know serenity.
Today I know that the better I get, the richer I become.
Money may not buy happiness, but it can buy the type of misery you can live with.
-- Ziggy
We think to ourselves, "Wouldn't it be nice not to have to worry about the washer breaking down?" "Wouldn't it be nice to drive a reliable car?" "Wouldn't it be nice to take a Caribbean vacation every year?" "Wouldn't it be nice not to have to work?" If we had money, we think, at least we wouldn't have to worry so much and could live comfortably.
True. Money buys external comfort - plush couches and chairs, luxury cars, beautiful environments. Money buys what comforts and soothes us on the outside. And, if we're going to be miserable anyway, why not do it in comfort?
We remember that regardless of our surroundings, misery is misery. Unless we have the right attitude, we'll find something wrong with whatever we have or don't have. When we work on improving our inner world - on alleviating the real cause of our misery - we know true comfort. We know serenity.
Today I know that the better I get, the richer I become.
You are reading from the book:
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