Recovery Meditations: December 18th
ACTION
"You learn to speak by speaking,
to study by studying,
to run by running,
to work by working;
in just the same way,
you learn to love by loving."
St. Francis De Sales
(1567 - 1622)
(in French, St François de Sales)
Bishop of Geneva, Switzerland and a Roman Catholic saint.
St. Francis de
Sales lived from 1567 to 1622. Isn't it amazing that a man who lived over 300
years before the birth of our recovery program could encapsulate its meaning in
the above quote? Put another way, what St. Francis was saying was, "You
work the program by working the program."
I've met so
many people who had theoretical knowledge of recovery, but no practical
experience. They don't work the program; they just talk the talk without
walking the walk. I'm not proud to admit that I've been one of those people
myself.
It's a
wonderful feeling to actually work the program, to take the Steps, and to trust
in the God of my understanding to keep me working it. Paying lip service to the
program doesn't bring recovery; only working it does. Anything else is a waste
of time and energy.
One Day at a
Time . . .
I will work
the program by working the program; today, I'll take action to bring about my
recovery.
Jeff
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Each Day a New Beginning
Destruction. Crashing realities
exploding in imperfect landings. Ouch. It's my heart that's breaking,
for these have been my fantasies and my world.
—Mary Casey
We frequently aren't given what we want - whether it's a particular job, a certain relationship, a special talent. But we are always given exactly what we need at the moment. None of us can see what tomorrow is designed to bring, and our fantasies are always tied to a future moment. Our fantasies seldom correlate with the real conditions that are necessary to our continued spiritual growth.
Fantasies are purposeful. They give us goals to strive for, directions to move in. They are never as far-sighted as the goals our higher power has in store for us, though. We have far greater gifts than we are aware of, and we are being pushed to develop them at the very times when it seems our world is crashing down.
We can cherish our fantasies - but let them go. Our real purpose in life far exceeds our fondest dreams. The Steps have given us the tools to make God's plan for us a reality.
How limited is my vision, my dreams. If one of mine is dashed today, I will rest assured that an even better one will present itself, if I but let it.
—Mary Casey
We frequently aren't given what we want - whether it's a particular job, a certain relationship, a special talent. But we are always given exactly what we need at the moment. None of us can see what tomorrow is designed to bring, and our fantasies are always tied to a future moment. Our fantasies seldom correlate with the real conditions that are necessary to our continued spiritual growth.
Fantasies are purposeful. They give us goals to strive for, directions to move in. They are never as far-sighted as the goals our higher power has in store for us, though. We have far greater gifts than we are aware of, and we are being pushed to develop them at the very times when it seems our world is crashing down.
We can cherish our fantasies - but let them go. Our real purpose in life far exceeds our fondest dreams. The Steps have given us the tools to make God's plan for us a reality.
How limited is my vision, my dreams. If one of mine is dashed today, I will rest assured that an even better one will present itself, if I but let it.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Food for Thought
Concentrating
Our program requires concentration. It is not something that we may consider casually in odd bits of leftover time. Since abstinence is the most important thing in our lives, we devote our best energies to maintaining it. Many of us find that time spent concentrating on our program at the beginning of the day is most fruitful.
These periods of concentration do not need to be long. It is the quality of our attention that counts. A few minutes in the morning spent in contact with our Higher Power can set the tone for the entire day. We touch base with who we are and where we are going. Concentrating brings results.
Whenever thoughts of food and eating interrupt our activities, we can stop for a moment to concentrate on our program. Abstinence is not always foremost in our minds, but it is always there when we are threatened by a return to old thoughts and cravings. Compulsive overeating was concentration on food; abstinence is concentration on recovery.
I pray that You will direct my concentration.
Our program requires concentration. It is not something that we may consider casually in odd bits of leftover time. Since abstinence is the most important thing in our lives, we devote our best energies to maintaining it. Many of us find that time spent concentrating on our program at the beginning of the day is most fruitful.
These periods of concentration do not need to be long. It is the quality of our attention that counts. A few minutes in the morning spent in contact with our Higher Power can set the tone for the entire day. We touch base with who we are and where we are going. Concentrating brings results.
Whenever thoughts of food and eating interrupt our activities, we can stop for a moment to concentrate on our program. Abstinence is not always foremost in our minds, but it is always there when we are threatened by a return to old thoughts and cravings. Compulsive overeating was concentration on food; abstinence is concentration on recovery.
I pray that You will direct my concentration.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation
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The Language of Letting Go
Staying Open to Our Feelings
Many of us have gotten so good at following the "don't feel" rule that we can try to talk ourselves out of having feelings, even in recovery.
"If I was really working a good program, I wouldn't feel angry."
"I don't get angry. I'm a Christian. I forgive and forget."
"I'm not angry. I'm affirming that I'm happy."
These are all statements, some of them quite clever, that indicate we're operating under the "don't feel" rule again.
Part of working a good program means acknowledging and dealing with our feelings. We strive to accept and deal with our anger so it doesn't harden into resentments. We don't use recovery as an excuse to shut down our emotions.
Yes, we are striving for forgiveness, but we still want to feel, listen to, and stay with our feelings until it is time to release them appropriately. Our Higher Power created the emotional part of ourselves. God is not telling us to not feel; it's our dysfunctional systems.
We also need to be careful how we use affirmations; discounting our emotions won't make feelings go away. If we're angry, it's okay to have that feeling. That's part of how we get and stay healthy.
Today, I will refuse to accept shame from others or myself for feeling my feelings.
Many of us have gotten so good at following the "don't feel" rule that we can try to talk ourselves out of having feelings, even in recovery.
"If I was really working a good program, I wouldn't feel angry."
"I don't get angry. I'm a Christian. I forgive and forget."
"I'm not angry. I'm affirming that I'm happy."
These are all statements, some of them quite clever, that indicate we're operating under the "don't feel" rule again.
Part of working a good program means acknowledging and dealing with our feelings. We strive to accept and deal with our anger so it doesn't harden into resentments. We don't use recovery as an excuse to shut down our emotions.
Yes, we are striving for forgiveness, but we still want to feel, listen to, and stay with our feelings until it is time to release them appropriately. Our Higher Power created the emotional part of ourselves. God is not telling us to not feel; it's our dysfunctional systems.
We also need to be careful how we use affirmations; discounting our emotions won't make feelings go away. If we're angry, it's okay to have that feeling. That's part of how we get and stay healthy.
Today, I will refuse to accept shame from others or myself for feeling my feelings.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation
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Love one another, but make not a bond of love.
--Kahlil Gibran
Love doesn't demand; love compromises. It doesn't possess; it frees. Love doesn't gloat; it praises. Love makes friends of strangers. It softens our rough edges and strengthens our assets. Knowing we're loved inspires us and invites forth our best effort. Offering our love humbles us and cultivates an inner joy.
Never, in the name of love, should we direct another person's life, but instead let's celebrate the choices made by someone dear, even when they run counter to our own desires. We are each blessed with a destiny, unique and necessary to the others in our lives. We must be allowed to travel our paths to fulfillment.
Let's free one another and know real love.
You are reading from the book:
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