For Today: September 9th

Minds, like bodies, will often fall into a pimpled, ill-conditioned state from mere excess of comfort.

Charles Dickens

Excess kills the very qualities I seek in anything, be it possessions, activities or food.  Compulsive overeating gives the illusion of comfort, but what begins as an attempt to fill unmet needs soon takes on a life of its own, demanding more and giving less in return.

True comfort is to be found in the balance and sanity of abstinence. So deep and pure is this comfort that it is well worth whatever trouble or pain I might have to pass through to attain it.

For Today:  Abstinence from compulsive overeating is a state of mind, not a diet. God grant me abstinence today and, if need be, the willingness to go to any length to get it.

This is probably THE best reading I’ve ever seen on the subject of addictive eating! “Excess kills the very qualities I seek in anything”………”overeating gives the illusion of comfort……but soon takes on a life of its own, demanding MORE and giving less………”

No truer words have EVER been uttered!  Take binges for example. What starts out as a few extra cookies easily leads to a whole box of cookies and a ½ gallon of ice cream to go with it.  No matter HOW much trigger food I eat, it is NEVER enough…………and it takes more and more and MORE to ‘fill me up’ once I get started.

If I am eating compulsively, I am not eating for taste; I am eating for VOLUME.  I realized that nasty little fact back in June of 2008 when I started my journey to recovery.  That’s how I talk myself off the ledge, when I am compelled and DRIVEN to overeat: I tell myself that no matter how much I eat, it STILL won’t be enough……so why get started? That’s how I stopped drinking, too: by recognizing the fact that getting whacked out drunk was STILL not satisfying me……so where would it end? With me in the gutter? Maybe. Probably.

Smoking, drinking, and eating to excess has always been my problem. Oral fixation I wonder? Ha.  In my futile attempt to fill unmet needs, I wound up discovering unmet WANTS instead.  My wants in these areas will ALWAYS exceed my needs……….so, staying abstinent from all 3 behaviors is vital for me.

For today, I thank God for leading me to find abstinence from booze, cigarettes and excess/unhealthy food.  My life is far richer for my LACK of excess than it ever was WITH excess.