“You’ve got to have a dream
in order to make a dream come true.”
Oscar Hammerstein II
Since first hearing this saying many years ago, I have come to believe in it. I have always had the dream of being happy, healthy, helpful and whole, but it wasn’t until I found this program (or it found me) that I am learning I can have all of these things. Through the program I am being shown a way to achieve them.When I first joined the program, I just wanted to lose weight. But as I continue to understand and learn about the program, my dream is slowly coming true. It’s a slow path for me right now, but as long as I keep the dream alive in my mind, heart and soul, I know I'll be able to accomplish it one day at a time!One day at a time...
I ask my Higher Power to keep me on the right path toward my dream of being happy, healthy, helpful and whole. And right now, in this moment, I am grateful for my dream and for the opportunity to fulfill it.
~ Lorraine ~
________________________________________________________________________
Each Day A New Beginning
It's astonishing in this world how things don't turn out at all the way you expect them to!
—Agatha Christie
Probably every day of our lives, a plan goes awry. Often we have counted heavily on a particular outcome. We generally assume we have all things under control and know exactly what's best for us, and everyone else as well. But such is not the case. There is a bigger picture than the one we see. The outcome of that picture is out of our hands.
Our vision is limited, and again divinely so. However, we are able to see all that we need to see, today. And more important, if we can trust our inner guidance regarding the events of today, we'll begin to see how each day fills in a shade more of the bigger picture of our lives. In retrospect we can see how all events have contributed, in important ways, to the women we are becoming. Where today's events are leading we can't know, for certain, but we can trust the divine plan.
I will anticipate with faith what lies ahead today. All experiences carry me forward to fulfill my goal in life. I will be alert for the nudge.
—Agatha Christie
Probably every day of our lives, a plan goes awry. Often we have counted heavily on a particular outcome. We generally assume we have all things under control and know exactly what's best for us, and everyone else as well. But such is not the case. There is a bigger picture than the one we see. The outcome of that picture is out of our hands.
Our vision is limited, and again divinely so. However, we are able to see all that we need to see, today. And more important, if we can trust our inner guidance regarding the events of today, we'll begin to see how each day fills in a shade more of the bigger picture of our lives. In retrospect we can see how all events have contributed, in important ways, to the women we are becoming. Where today's events are leading we can't know, for certain, but we can trust the divine plan.
I will anticipate with faith what lies ahead today. All experiences carry me forward to fulfill my goal in life. I will be alert for the nudge.
From Each Day
a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982,
1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Food For Thought
Amends to Ourselves
By our compulsive overeating, we ourselves have usually been hurt more than anyone else. Because we could not trust ourselves, we had little self-respect or self-confidence. In many cases, we actually hated ourselves for what we thought was weakness and now know to be a disease.
By ourselves, we cannot control the illness, but through OA and our Higher Power, we are able to recover. With recovery comes a new attitude toward self. We see that we find happiness by abstaining from compulsive overeating and seeking every day to do God's will. New power and order enter into our daily activities, and we begin to approve of ourselves.
The best way that we can make amends to ourselves for self-hate and failure to develop our abilities is by maintaining our abstinence each day. We then gain the confidence to say no to those things which are not in our best interest. Instead of destroying ourselves with too much food and the wrong kind of activities, we are building a new life fed with the nourishment from our Higher Power.
Thank You for new opportunities to grow.
By our compulsive overeating, we ourselves have usually been hurt more than anyone else. Because we could not trust ourselves, we had little self-respect or self-confidence. In many cases, we actually hated ourselves for what we thought was weakness and now know to be a disease.
By ourselves, we cannot control the illness, but through OA and our Higher Power, we are able to recover. With recovery comes a new attitude toward self. We see that we find happiness by abstaining from compulsive overeating and seeking every day to do God's will. New power and order enter into our daily activities, and we begin to approve of ourselves.
The best way that we can make amends to ourselves for self-hate and failure to develop our abilities is by maintaining our abstinence each day. We then gain the confidence to say no to those things which are not in our best interest. Instead of destroying ourselves with too much food and the wrong kind of activities, we are building a new life fed with the nourishment from our Higher Power.
Thank You for new opportunities to grow.
From Food for
Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992
by Hazelden Foundation.
The Language of Letting Go
Stopping Our Pain
Some of my feelings have been stored so long they have freezer burn.
—Beyond Codependency
There are many sources of pain in our life. Those of us recovering from adult children and codependency issues frequently have a cesspool of unresolved pain from the past. We have feelings, sometimes from early childhood to the present, that either hurt too much to feel or that we had no support and permission to deal with.
There are other inevitable sources of pain in our life too. There is the sadness and grief that comes when we experience change, even good change, as we let go of one part of our life, and begin our journey into the new.
There is pain in recovery, as we begin allowing ourselves to feel while dropping our protective shield of denial.
There is the pain that leads and guides us into better choices for our future.
We have many choices about how to stop this pain. We may have experimented with different options. Compulsive and addictive behaviors stop pain - temporarily. We may have used alcohol, other drugs, relationships, or sex to stop our pain.
We may talk compulsively or compulsively focus on other people and their needs as a way to avoid or stop our pain.
We may use religion to avoid our feelings.
We may resort to denial of how we are feeling to stop our pain.
We may stay so busy that we don't have time to feel. We may use money, exercise, or food to stop our pain.
We have many choices. To survive, we may have used some of these options, only to find that these were Band Aids - temporary pain relievers that did not solve the problem. They did not really stop our pain; they postponed it.
In recovery, there is a better choice about how we may stop pain. We can face it and feel it. When we are ready, with our Higher Power's help, we can summon the courage to feel the pain, let it go, and let the pain move forward - into a new decision, a better life.
We can stop the behaviors we are doing that cause pain, if that's appropriate. We can make a decision to remove ourselves from situations that cause repeated, similar pain. We can learn the lesson our pain is trying to teach us.
If we are being pelted by pain, there is a lesson. Trust that idea. Something is being worked out in us. The answer will not come from addictive or other compulsive behaviors; we will receive the answer when we feel our feelings.
It takes courage to be willing to stand still and feel what we must feel. Sometimes, we have what seems like endless layers of pain inside us. Pain hurts. Grief hurts. Sadness hurts. It does not feel good. But neither does denying what is already there; neither does living a lifetime with old and new pockets of pain packed, stored, and stacked within.
It will only hurt for a while, no longer than necessary, to heal us. We can trust that if we must feel pain, it is part of healing, and it is good. We can become willing to surrender to and accept the inevitable painful feelings that are a good part of recovery.
Go with the flow, even when the flow takes us through uncomfortable feelings. Release, freedom, healing, and good feelings are on the other side.
Today, I am open and willing to feel what I need to feel. I am willing to stop my compulsive behaviors. I am willing to let go of my denial. I am willing to feel what I need to feel to be healed, healthy, and whole.
Some of my feelings have been stored so long they have freezer burn.
—Beyond Codependency
There are many sources of pain in our life. Those of us recovering from adult children and codependency issues frequently have a cesspool of unresolved pain from the past. We have feelings, sometimes from early childhood to the present, that either hurt too much to feel or that we had no support and permission to deal with.
There are other inevitable sources of pain in our life too. There is the sadness and grief that comes when we experience change, even good change, as we let go of one part of our life, and begin our journey into the new.
There is pain in recovery, as we begin allowing ourselves to feel while dropping our protective shield of denial.
There is the pain that leads and guides us into better choices for our future.
We have many choices about how to stop this pain. We may have experimented with different options. Compulsive and addictive behaviors stop pain - temporarily. We may have used alcohol, other drugs, relationships, or sex to stop our pain.
We may talk compulsively or compulsively focus on other people and their needs as a way to avoid or stop our pain.
We may use religion to avoid our feelings.
We may resort to denial of how we are feeling to stop our pain.
We may stay so busy that we don't have time to feel. We may use money, exercise, or food to stop our pain.
We have many choices. To survive, we may have used some of these options, only to find that these were Band Aids - temporary pain relievers that did not solve the problem. They did not really stop our pain; they postponed it.
In recovery, there is a better choice about how we may stop pain. We can face it and feel it. When we are ready, with our Higher Power's help, we can summon the courage to feel the pain, let it go, and let the pain move forward - into a new decision, a better life.
We can stop the behaviors we are doing that cause pain, if that's appropriate. We can make a decision to remove ourselves from situations that cause repeated, similar pain. We can learn the lesson our pain is trying to teach us.
If we are being pelted by pain, there is a lesson. Trust that idea. Something is being worked out in us. The answer will not come from addictive or other compulsive behaviors; we will receive the answer when we feel our feelings.
It takes courage to be willing to stand still and feel what we must feel. Sometimes, we have what seems like endless layers of pain inside us. Pain hurts. Grief hurts. Sadness hurts. It does not feel good. But neither does denying what is already there; neither does living a lifetime with old and new pockets of pain packed, stored, and stacked within.
It will only hurt for a while, no longer than necessary, to heal us. We can trust that if we must feel pain, it is part of healing, and it is good. We can become willing to surrender to and accept the inevitable painful feelings that are a good part of recovery.
Go with the flow, even when the flow takes us through uncomfortable feelings. Release, freedom, healing, and good feelings are on the other side.
Today, I am open and willing to feel what I need to feel. I am willing to stop my compulsive behaviors. I am willing to let go of my denial. I am willing to feel what I need to feel to be healed, healthy, and whole.
From The
Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Today's Gift
One must lose one's life in order to find it.
—Anne Morrow Lindbergh
We are often so busy trying to control the outcome of the happenings in our daily lives, so intent on projecting our tomorrows that we let life slip by. Life is today. This is all we have for sure - the moments in our lives we cannot hold. Sometimes it feels as if those moments are beyond time and place, gifts from God to receive and give up at the same time. Like a dragonfly that lights on our hand and will either be crushed or will fly away if we try to close our fingers over it.
Life is a series of things to let go of - our friends and loved ones, our children as they grow, our dreams, or our youth. Only we ourselves, our inner selves, are a constant to be found and learned about every day, in the present moment.
How well can I enjoy each moment today?
—Anne Morrow Lindbergh
We are often so busy trying to control the outcome of the happenings in our daily lives, so intent on projecting our tomorrows that we let life slip by. Life is today. This is all we have for sure - the moments in our lives we cannot hold. Sometimes it feels as if those moments are beyond time and place, gifts from God to receive and give up at the same time. Like a dragonfly that lights on our hand and will either be crushed or will fly away if we try to close our fingers over it.
Life is a series of things to let go of - our friends and loved ones, our children as they grow, our dreams, or our youth. Only we ourselves, our inner selves, are a constant to be found and learned about every day, in the present moment.
How well can I enjoy each moment today?
From Today's
Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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