You cannot do a kindness too soon ...
because you never know how soon it will be too late.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
So many people in program sit silently in meetings because they don't think they have anything of importance to say. Perhaps they haven't been in program very long, and feel that, because they aren't a seasoned veteran, they haven't the right to speak up. But everyone's experiences and insights are different, and I would appreciate hearing from those who are quiet. They just might say something that will keep me from losing my serenity and abstinence. It would be a kindness for them to speak up.
I've had people tell me, "Oh, I can't pick up the phone and make an outreach call to someone I just met." To that I say, "Why not?" It would be a kindness to let someone know that you're there and you care about them.
Sometimes a person will say, "But I'm having a bad day myself; how can I offer hope to someone when I'm in such a shape?" It would be a kindness to share your struggle, for you would be giving others the chance to serve. I think it's as much a selfishness on our part to deny someone the opportunity to serve us as it is to deny our service to someone who is hurting.
Ours is a fatal disease. I don't want to risk missing the chance to serve someone who may not be with us tomorrow. I want to do that kindness today in case it's YOU who isn't here tomorrow. I hope you would do that kindness today in case it's ME who isn't here tomorrow.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will perform an act of kindness,
for I never know when I may forever lose that opportunity.
~ JAR ~
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Each Day A New Beginning
To have one's individuality completely ignored is like being pushed quite out of life. Like being blown out as one blows out a light.
—Evelyn Scott
We need to know that we matter in this life. We need evidence that others are aware of our presence. And thus, we can be certain that others need the same attention from us. When we give it, we get it. So the giving of attention to another searching soul meets our own need for attention as well.
Respectful recognition of another's presence blesses her, God, and ourselves. And we help one another grow, in important ways, each time we pay the compliment of acknowledgment.
We're not sure, on occasion, just what we have to offer our friends, families, co-workers. Why we are in certain circumstances may have us baffled, but it's quite probable that the people we associate with regularly need something we can give them; the reverse is just as likely. So we can begin with close attention to people in our path. It takes careful listening and close observation to sense the message another soul may be sending to our own.
I will be conscious of the people around me. I shall acknowledge them and be thankful for all they are offering me.
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Food For Thought
Complicated food plans and complicated lives work against us in this program. We compulsive overeaters have a hard time making decisions about food, and the more simple our menus, the better. We also tend to overextend ourselves in other areas, dissipating energy, which we need for working our program.
Our three meals a day can be nourishing and attractive without being elaborate. If we spend too much time and energy planning and preparing our food, we run the risk of reactivating our obsession. Too much thinking about food usually leads to overeating and invariably produces mental turmoil.
For our peace of mind and emotional serenity, we need to keep the mechanics of our lives as simple as possible. If the spirit is to be free, it cannot be shackled by over concern with material things.
May I keep life simple today and use my energies for working the program.
From Food for
Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992
by Hazelden Foundation.
The Language of Letting Go
For many of us, the most difficult word to say is one of the shortest and easiest in the vocabulary: No. Go ahead, say it aloud: No.
No - simple to pronounce, hard to say. We're afraid people won't like us, or we feel guilty. We may believe that a "good" employee, child, parent, spouse, or Christian never says no.
The problem is, if we don't learn to say no, we stop liking ourselves and the people we always try to please. We may even punish others out of resentment.
When do we say no? When no is what we really mean.
When we learn to say no, we stop lying. People can trust us, and we can trust ourselves. All sorts of good things happen when we start saying what we mean.
If we're scared to say no, we can buy some time. We can take a break, rehearse the word, and go back and say no. We don't have to offer long explanations for our decisions.
When we can say no, we can say yes to the good. Our no's and our yes's begin to be taken seriously. We gain control of ourselves. And we learn a secret: "No" isn't really that hard to say.
Today, I will say no if that is what I mean.
From The
Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Today's Gift
—Rainer Maria Rilke
For a relationship to be healthy and fulfilling, each of us must respect the other. "Two solitudes" is exactly what we are, and we will never be one, no matter how close we become. It may feel like that at times, but we always remain separate persons with our own thoughts, feelings, dreams, and interests.
When we love one another, we allow each other to be who we are, to have our own lives, for it is out of those separate lives that we bring strength and energy and life into our relationships.
We are meant to honor the differences between us. Often these differences lead to squabbles, but when we recognize that each of us is necessary to the union we have created, we create a better one, far superior to the sum of its parts.
What differences between us make our lives together better?
From Today's
Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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