Secrets
There were deep secrets hidden in my heart,
never said for fear others would scoff or sneer.
At last I can reveal my sufferings,
for the strength I once felt in silence has lost all its power.
Deidra Sarault
I've heard it said in program that we are only a sick as the secrets we keep. If that is the case, then I was very sick when desperation forced me through the doors of ths wonderful fellowship.One Day at a Time . . .
Not one of my friends or family knew what I was doing around food, as most of it was done in secret, and I was always careful to remove all the evidence. I couldn't believe that anyone would love me if they knew what I was doing around food, and felt that I was either really bad or totally crazy, or both. But for the first time ever, I was able to come clean about what I was doing around food, and I wasn't judged or frowned upon. The love and acceptance I have received here has been totally overwhelming, but in addition I found out that others had done the same or similar things to what I had done, and so for the first time ever, I felt that I wasn't alone. Not only have I been able to talk freely about my food and what I had been doing, as well as what it was doing to me, but in the fourth and fifth step, I was finally able to share with another person my darkest deepest secrets, that for years I'd thought had made me this terrible person. It was in fact in sharing all the things that I'd thought of as so bad, that I came to realise that it was only my magnifying mind that had made them appear so, and that in fact they really weren't bad at all. I would never have found that out, had I not been in this program, and I'm so grateful for the relief that sharing all these things has given me.
I will learn to get honest and share with my sponsor and others in this program, all the things that are bothering me, whether it be food or other issues, so I can be relieved of the pain that all my secrets are causing me.
~ Sharon
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Each Day A New Beginning
—Eleanor Roosevelt
How can we ever do that which seems impossible? Taking a class, quitting a job, leaving a destructive relationship behind, asking for help; none of these can we do alone or with ease. All of these we can handle when we rely on the help offered by the program, the help of one another, the help promised by our higher power. Tackling with God's help that which seems impossible, reduces it to manageable size. It also deflates the power our fears have given it.
That which we fear grows in proportion to our obsession with it. The more we fear a thing, the bigger it becomes, which in turn increases our fear. How lucky we are that God awaits our call for the strength, the companionship that is guaranteed us! We are in partnership, all the way, every day, if we'd only recognize it. We can move toward and through anything. And the added benefit is that we come to trust our partnership. We soon know that all situations can be met. All experiences can be survived. Avoidance is no longer our technique for survival.
A deep breath invites the inner strength to move through me. I will feel the exhilaration of God's power. And I will know the excitement of growth and peace.
From Each Day
a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey © 1982,
1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
Food For Thought
We call our program a selfish one. It is something, which we want more than anything else, not only for weight loss but also for peace of mind. We do not join OA to please anyone else; our primary purpose is to do what is best for ourselves.
Starting the program where we are, we take the aspects of it which apply to each current situation. We give to and share with our group, but we also remember that the best thing we can do for any other compulsive overeater is to practice our own abstinence.
We have found that putting ourselves down does no good, either to ourselves or to anyone else. If for someone else we do something, which we sincerely believe is wrong for us, then our resentment is bound to come out sooner or later.
When we were overeating compulsively, we often tried to hold down our resentment with food. Instead of honestly facing anger and hostility, we tried to make it go away by eating.
The OA program gives us a better way to deal with negative emotions, and for selfish reasons we need this program!
May I not be afraid to recognize my needs.
From Food for
Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L. ©1980, 1992
by Hazelden Foundation.
The Language of Letting Go
We are powerless over other people's expectations of us. We cannot control what others want, what they expect, or what they want us to do and be.
We can control how we respond to other people's expectations.
During the course of any day, people may make demands on our time, talents, energy, money, and emotions. We do not have to say yes to every request. We do not have to feel guilty if we say no. And we do not have to allow the barrage of demands to control the course of our life.
We do not have to spend our life reacting to others and to the course they would prefer we took with our life.
We can set boundaries, firm limits on how far we shall go with others. We can trust and listen to ourselves. We can set goals and direction for our life. We can place value on ourselves.
We can own our power with people.
Buy some time. Think about what you want. Consider how responding to another's needs will affect the course of your life. We live or own life by not letting other people, their expectations, and their demands control the course of our life. We can let them have their demands and expectations; we can allow them to have their feelings. We can own our power to choose the path that is right for us.
Today, God, help me own my power by detaching and peacefully choosing the course of action that is right for me. Help me know I can detach from the expectations and wants of others. Help me stop pleasing other people and start pleasing myself.
From The
Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Today's thought from the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation is:
Leave room for God to surprise you!
--Ernie K.
It is human to be disappointed when we don't get what we want. But when we dwell on our disappointment, as if we should have gotten what we wanted, then we forget to trust that God may have something different in store for us. Many of us pray, "Thy will be done," but more often than not, when we don't get what we want, we forget it may be God's will that we not get it!
We can only know the present moment. This is our life – all of it. When we worry about future wants and past disappointments, we don't leave room in ourselves for the present. When we let God take care of the future and live the best we can right now , we can feel assured we'll be ready for the better things that are in store for us.
Today help me to trust in Your will.
Leave room for God to surprise you!
--Ernie K.
It is human to be disappointed when we don't get what we want. But when we dwell on our disappointment, as if we should have gotten what we wanted, then we forget to trust that God may have something different in store for us. Many of us pray, "Thy will be done," but more often than not, when we don't get what we want, we forget it may be God's will that we not get it!
We can only know the present moment. This is our life – all of it. When we worry about future wants and past disappointments, we don't leave room in ourselves for the present. When we let God take care of the future and live the best we can right now , we can feel assured we'll be ready for the better things that are in store for us.
Today help me to trust in Your will.
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