Recovery Meditations: August 15th
LOVE
“Love conquers all things.
Let us, too, surrender to love.”
Virgil
Learning to love myself has been one of the hardest lessons I've had to learn. I had to discover my capacity for self-care. I had to listen to the way I talked to myself and to learn to speak in more affirming ways. Learning to smile -- and then laugh -- when I made a mistake helped me to be less self-centered and more able to just have fun.
Life is a great experience when I surrender myself to the love around me. Expressing my love to others increases its quantity and quality inside of me. We all need to know that someone loves us and that we are lovable. Everyone needs to know that they are sufficient. I've discovered that as I give love to others, it is returned to me many times over.
One day at a time...
I will work at expressing unconditional love.
~ YAL
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Each Day a New Beginning
Life does not need to mutilate itself in order to be pure.
—Simone Weil
How terribly complicated we choose to make life's many questions. Should we call a friend and apologize or wait for her call? Are the children getting the kind of care they must, right now? That we "Came to believe in a power greater than ourselves" is often far from our thoughts when we most need it.
Our need to make all things perfect, to know all the answers, to control everything within our range, creates problems where none really exist. And the more we focus on the problem we've created, the bigger it becomes.
Inattention relieves the tension; last week's problems can seldom be recalled. The one we are keeping a problem with our undivided attention can be turned loose, at this moment. And just as quickly, the turmoil we've been feeling will be beyond recall too.
The program offers us another way to approach life. We need not mutilate it or ourselves. We can learn to accept the things we cannot change, and change the things we can . . . with practice.
I will pray for wisdom today. I shall expect wisdom, not problems, and the day will smoothly slip by.
—Simone Weil
How terribly complicated we choose to make life's many questions. Should we call a friend and apologize or wait for her call? Are the children getting the kind of care they must, right now? That we "Came to believe in a power greater than ourselves" is often far from our thoughts when we most need it.
Our need to make all things perfect, to know all the answers, to control everything within our range, creates problems where none really exist. And the more we focus on the problem we've created, the bigger it becomes.
Inattention relieves the tension; last week's problems can seldom be recalled. The one we are keeping a problem with our undivided attention can be turned loose, at this moment. And just as quickly, the turmoil we've been feeling will be beyond recall too.
The program offers us another way to approach life. We need not mutilate it or ourselves. We can learn to accept the things we cannot change, and change the things we can . . . with practice.
I will pray for wisdom today. I shall expect wisdom, not problems, and the day will smoothly slip by.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation
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Food for Thought
Inner Tigers
What we fear facing and dealing with is often inside. We may transfer our fear and irritation to external circumstances and the people around us, when what we need to do is look inside. Usually, we are our own worst enemy.
Our fears go back to a time when we were very young and relatively helpless. We may still be afraid of rejection, of being inferior, of being hurt with no one to take care of us. We may have an irrational fear of economic insecurity, which comes from a time when we were aware of financial problems but were too young to understand them.
Whether our inner tigers are real or made out of paper, we need to face them instead of eating to appease them. As we recover from compulsive overeating, many of the fears, which we had tried to bury with food, come to consciousness. With the Power greater than ourselves, we are able to tame the inner tigers.
Secure in Your care, may I not fear self-discovery.
What we fear facing and dealing with is often inside. We may transfer our fear and irritation to external circumstances and the people around us, when what we need to do is look inside. Usually, we are our own worst enemy.
Our fears go back to a time when we were very young and relatively helpless. We may still be afraid of rejection, of being inferior, of being hurt with no one to take care of us. We may have an irrational fear of economic insecurity, which comes from a time when we were aware of financial problems but were too young to understand them.
Whether our inner tigers are real or made out of paper, we need to face them instead of eating to appease them. As we recover from compulsive overeating, many of the fears, which we had tried to bury with food, come to consciousness. With the Power greater than ourselves, we are able to tame the inner tigers.
Secure in Your care, may I not fear self-discovery.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
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The Language of Letting Go
Leaving Room for Feelings
We need to allow enough room for others and ourselves to have and work through our feelings.
We are people, not robots. An important part of us - who we are, how we grow, how we live - is connected to our emotional center. We have feelings, sometimes - difficult ones, sometimes disruptive ones, and sometimes explosive ones that need to be worked through.
By facing and working through these feelings we and others grow. In relationships, whether it is a love relationship, a friendship, a family relationship, or a close business relationship, people need room to have and work through their feelings.
Some call it "going through the process."
It is unreasonable to expect ourselves or others to not need time and room to work through feelings. We will be setting ourselves and our relationships up for failure if we do not allow this time and room in our life.
We need time to work through feelings. We need the space and permission to work through these feelings in the awkward, uncomfortable, sometimes messy way that people work through feelings.
This is life. This is growth. This is okay.
We can allow room for feelings. We can let people have time and permission to go through their feelings. We do not have to keep others or ourselves under such a tight rein. While we work through our feelings we do not have to expend unnecessary energy reacting to each feeling others or we have. We don't have to take all our feelings, and others' feelings, so seriously while others or we are in the process of working through them.
Let the feelings flow and trust where the flow is taking you.
I can set reasonable boundaries for behavior, and still leave room for a range of emotions.
We need to allow enough room for others and ourselves to have and work through our feelings.
We are people, not robots. An important part of us - who we are, how we grow, how we live - is connected to our emotional center. We have feelings, sometimes - difficult ones, sometimes disruptive ones, and sometimes explosive ones that need to be worked through.
By facing and working through these feelings we and others grow. In relationships, whether it is a love relationship, a friendship, a family relationship, or a close business relationship, people need room to have and work through their feelings.
Some call it "going through the process."
It is unreasonable to expect ourselves or others to not need time and room to work through feelings. We will be setting ourselves and our relationships up for failure if we do not allow this time and room in our life.
We need time to work through feelings. We need the space and permission to work through these feelings in the awkward, uncomfortable, sometimes messy way that people work through feelings.
This is life. This is growth. This is okay.
We can allow room for feelings. We can let people have time and permission to go through their feelings. We do not have to keep others or ourselves under such a tight rein. While we work through our feelings we do not have to expend unnecessary energy reacting to each feeling others or we have. We don't have to take all our feelings, and others' feelings, so seriously while others or we are in the process of working through them.
Let the feelings flow and trust where the flow is taking you.
I can set reasonable boundaries for behavior, and still leave room for a range of emotions.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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Each of my days are miracles. I won't waste my day; I won't throw away a miracle.
-- Kelley Vickstrom
It's so easy to forget to be grateful for our many blessings. We may take our freedom from the compulsion to drink or use for granted. Having learned to monitor our behavior and change it when necessary, we seldom treasure this skill as an asset.
The rut of complacency claims all of us at one time or another. And our complacency can lead us to the stinking thinking that's only a step away from drinking or using or some other compulsive behavior. Having sponsors point out our complacency may irritate us, but it may also save our lives.
Practicing gratitude will keep us aware of the small and large miracles that we have experienced on this recovery journey: We remember where we were last night (thanks to the clear vision of abstinence). We have reconciled with family members.
In fact, we are walking miracles, and God has a plan for the rest of our lives. Let's be ready for it.
I will try to be attentive to every moment of today, knowing that each experience is part of the miracle of my life.
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