Recovery Meditations: March 9th
~ THE ITSY BITSY SPIDER ~
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Frank Herbert, Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear, Dune
Recently in our meeting room we had a new ‘member’. He was HUGE – well, we thought so, but who are we to judge? He was hairy, well maybe we’re not perfect...He strode into the room like he owned the place. Well certainly he had as much right to be there as we all did.
We shrieked. Maybe it was those 8 hairy legs, maybe it’s because he ran towards us like a streak of lightening, who knows.
Whatever he must have thought watching us giants leaping around the room we can only guess. He certainly seemed far more scared of us than we of him. It got me thinking of the insanity of some fears. After all what could this fragile little hairy thing do to me? He didn’t have 8 giant slippers to hit ME on the head. I was the one with the power, yet, through my fear I was giving HIM the power he really didn’t have. Instead of using the Power to give myself more confidence and behave rationally, I was wasting it away, GIVING it away. So many times I seem to repeat this same pattern. Of course some fears are rational, but most aren’t.
This program gives ME the freedom to ask my Higher Power to take away my shortcomings. To relax and step back and make a fresh start. I need never be afraid again of irrational things, not if I truly work the program.
Itsy Bitsy Spider scuttled out of the meeting in rather a hurry that night. Was he trying to avoid participating in the 7th Tradition? Or did he have a genuine rational fear?
Maybe he was quite simply restored to sanity.
One Day at a Time . . .
I will not be afraid ... I will not empower anything to cause me to be fearful.
~ Marlene
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Each Day a New Beginning
I want to get you excited about who
you are, what you are, what you have, and what can still be for you. I
want to inspire you to see that you can go far beyond where you are
right now.
—Virginia Satir
Deciding to recover was our first step. That decision meant we did want to go beyond where we were. We did want something better for ourselves. And at times, in fleeting moments, we have been excited about who we are and our prospects for a better life.
The excitement and the inspiration come and go; they are seldom stationary. We can actively create the excitement and the inspiration. We need not wait for them to come to us. That's one of the choices we have as human beings, as women.
Passively waiting for "the good life" is past behavior. Each day, this day, we can set our sights on reaching a goal--we can take a step, or two, toward that goal. Progress is there for the making--achievement is there for the taking.
Whatever our hearts' pure desires, we can move toward that goal. We are what we need to be. We have what we need to move ahead.
Today, I will let my excitement for life's possibilities spur me on.
—Virginia Satir
Deciding to recover was our first step. That decision meant we did want to go beyond where we were. We did want something better for ourselves. And at times, in fleeting moments, we have been excited about who we are and our prospects for a better life.
The excitement and the inspiration come and go; they are seldom stationary. We can actively create the excitement and the inspiration. We need not wait for them to come to us. That's one of the choices we have as human beings, as women.
Passively waiting for "the good life" is past behavior. Each day, this day, we can set our sights on reaching a goal--we can take a step, or two, toward that goal. Progress is there for the making--achievement is there for the taking.
Whatever our hearts' pure desires, we can move toward that goal. We are what we need to be. We have what we need to move ahead.
Today, I will let my excitement for life's possibilities spur me on.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Food for Thought
No Ultimate "ah"
When we were overeating, we sought an ultimate experience of satisfaction from food. No matter what kind of food we ate, or how much, we never found that moment of satisfaction, that ultimate "ah." It was always just ahead, in the next bite.
Have we finally realized that the ultimate "ah" which we looked for in food does not exist? No matter what we eat, or how much, it will always elude us. Whatever we are looking for--happiness, success, peace, and fulfillment--it is not to be found in the refrigerator.
We do not promise that working the OA program will bring instant gratification or constant happiness. What we do know is that through the Twelve Steps we are given positive experiences which we did not have before OA. We are happier, more successful, more at peace, and more fulfilled than we ever were before we found this program.
By realizing that food holds no ultimate "ah," we can stop destroying ourselves by chasing a rainbow which does not exist.
May I stop searching for happiness where it is not to be found.
When we were overeating, we sought an ultimate experience of satisfaction from food. No matter what kind of food we ate, or how much, we never found that moment of satisfaction, that ultimate "ah." It was always just ahead, in the next bite.
Have we finally realized that the ultimate "ah" which we looked for in food does not exist? No matter what we eat, or how much, it will always elude us. Whatever we are looking for--happiness, success, peace, and fulfillment--it is not to be found in the refrigerator.
We do not promise that working the OA program will bring instant gratification or constant happiness. What we do know is that through the Twelve Steps we are given positive experiences which we did not have before OA. We are happier, more successful, more at peace, and more fulfilled than we ever were before we found this program.
By realizing that food holds no ultimate "ah," we can stop destroying ourselves by chasing a rainbow which does not exist.
May I stop searching for happiness where it is not to be found.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation.
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The Language of Letting Go
Taking Care of Ourselves
We cannot simultaneously set a boundary and take care of another person's feelings. It's impossible; the two acts contradict.
What a tremendous asset to have compassion for others! How difficult that same quality can make it to set boundaries!
It's good to care about other people and their feelings; it's essential to care about ourselves too. Sometimes, to take good care of ourselves, we need to make a choice.
Some of us live with a deeply ingrained message from our family, or from church, about never hurting other people's feelings. We can replace that message with a new one; one that says it's not okay to hurt ourselves. Sometimes, when we take care of ourselves, others will react with hurt feelings.
That's okay. We will learn, grow, and benefit by the experience; they will too. The most powerful and positive impact we can have on other people is accomplished by taking responsibility for ourselves, and allows others to be responsible for themselves.
Caring works. Care taking doesn't. We can learn to walk the line between the two.
Today, I will set the limits I need to set. I will let go of my need to take care of other peoples feelings and instead take care of my own. I will give myself permission to take care of myself, knowing its the best thing I can do for others and myself.
We cannot simultaneously set a boundary and take care of another person's feelings. It's impossible; the two acts contradict.
What a tremendous asset to have compassion for others! How difficult that same quality can make it to set boundaries!
It's good to care about other people and their feelings; it's essential to care about ourselves too. Sometimes, to take good care of ourselves, we need to make a choice.
Some of us live with a deeply ingrained message from our family, or from church, about never hurting other people's feelings. We can replace that message with a new one; one that says it's not okay to hurt ourselves. Sometimes, when we take care of ourselves, others will react with hurt feelings.
That's okay. We will learn, grow, and benefit by the experience; they will too. The most powerful and positive impact we can have on other people is accomplished by taking responsibility for ourselves, and allows others to be responsible for themselves.
Caring works. Care taking doesn't. We can learn to walk the line between the two.
Today, I will set the limits I need to set. I will let go of my need to take care of other peoples feelings and instead take care of my own. I will give myself permission to take care of myself, knowing its the best thing I can do for others and myself.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
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I feel we have picked each other from the crowd as fellow travelers, for neither of us is to the other's personality the end-all and the be-all.
-- Joanna Field
It's not mere chance that we gravitate toward those who become our friends. Nor is it only happenstance that we are picked by others. We are, in fact, on a journey and have much to learn. From our friends and even more so from those not so friendly, we are destined to learn what our souls yearn for. The journey is the process of enlightenment for which we all have gathered. From one another we are receiving that which we're ready to learn. All of us students. Each of us a teacher.
How
comforting to know that the pain of a particular experience, or the
confusion over a set of circumstances, will become understandable with
the passage of time. All experience plays its part. All of our
acquaintances share destinies overlapping our own. There is security in
knowing that our journeys are necessary and right for us.
I'll not discount the value of any person or any experience that circumstances offer today.
You are reading from the book:
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