Recovery Meditations: June 22nd
SUNLIGHT OF THE SPIRIT
“Trust God and buy broccoli.”
Author Unknown
I heard that quotation in an OA meeting years ago. “What an odd thing,” I thought. “Why does God care what I buy?” But as years have gone by and my abstinence continues one day at a time, I see the meaning of that phrase and have deep respect for its principle.
I can trust God 'til the cows come home, but there is work to be done. A more familiar quote is: “Trust God but continue to row toward shore.”
Abstinence for me is not only refraining from compulsive overeating, but abstaining from what I call my “alcoholic foods.” They block that beautiful contact between me and the Sunlight of the Spirit. It is my responsibility to purchase, prepare, weigh and measure the best foods for my peace of mind ~ and to open the channel to a Power Greater than Myself. Now I live this way, with thanks to the twelve steps.
One day at a time...
I will be grateful that food does not have power today.
~ Gerri
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Each Day a New Beginning
I want to do it because I want to do
it. Women must try to do things as men have tried. When they fail, their
failure must be but a challenge to others.
—Amelia Earhart
Fear of failure plagues many women, not just those who get into trouble with drugs, alcohol, food. Those of us in this recovery program may still fear failure. Halting our addiction doesn't solve all our problems, but it does allow us to realistically take stock of our assets. Knowing our assets and accepting them provides the confidence we need to attempt a project, to strive for a goal.
Another plus of this recovery program is the help available from our groups and our higher power. All things become possible when we understand we are not alone. Seeing other women strive and succeed or strive, fail, and strive again, undefeated, creates an energy flow that can spur us on, if we choose. Feeling good about others' accomplishments can motivate each of us.
Today, I will pay particular attention to the accomplishments of other women, those close to me and those I read or hear about. I will believe their example and feel the forward push.
—Amelia Earhart
Fear of failure plagues many women, not just those who get into trouble with drugs, alcohol, food. Those of us in this recovery program may still fear failure. Halting our addiction doesn't solve all our problems, but it does allow us to realistically take stock of our assets. Knowing our assets and accepting them provides the confidence we need to attempt a project, to strive for a goal.
Another plus of this recovery program is the help available from our groups and our higher power. All things become possible when we understand we are not alone. Seeing other women strive and succeed or strive, fail, and strive again, undefeated, creates an energy flow that can spur us on, if we choose. Feeling good about others' accomplishments can motivate each of us.
Today, I will pay particular attention to the accomplishments of other women, those close to me and those I read or hear about. I will believe their example and feel the forward push.
From Each Day a New Beginning: Daily Meditations for Women by Karen Casey
© 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation.
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Food for Thought
God Is a Verb
We cannot contain our Higher Power at a fixed point or in a closed system. However we may understand God, our understanding is always limited. The Power that rescues us from compulsive overeating is an active force, which constantly beckons us to move on. What we were to do yesterday is past; a new day brings new challenges and opportunities.
Our compulsion had us trapped in a pattern of self-destructive repetition. We did the same dumb thing over and over again. When we turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understand Him, we are linking up with the source of newness and creativity. God moves, and if we are linked with Him, we also move. His spirit changes us, and what we thought and did yesterday is not adequate to the demands of today.
Trusting our Higher Power means acting according to His promptings. We follow Him as He leads us into new tasks and activities and ideas. We learn from experience that He is always more than adequate for our needs.
May I follow where You lead.
We cannot contain our Higher Power at a fixed point or in a closed system. However we may understand God, our understanding is always limited. The Power that rescues us from compulsive overeating is an active force, which constantly beckons us to move on. What we were to do yesterday is past; a new day brings new challenges and opportunities.
Our compulsion had us trapped in a pattern of self-destructive repetition. We did the same dumb thing over and over again. When we turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understand Him, we are linking up with the source of newness and creativity. God moves, and if we are linked with Him, we also move. His spirit changes us, and what we thought and did yesterday is not adequate to the demands of today.
Trusting our Higher Power means acting according to His promptings. We follow Him as He leads us into new tasks and activities and ideas. We learn from experience that He is always more than adequate for our needs.
May I follow where You lead.
From Food for Thought: Daily Meditations for Overeaters by Elisabeth L.
©1980, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation
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The Language of Letting Go
Work Histories
Just as we have relationship histories, most of us have work histories.
Just as we have a present circumstance to accept and deal with in our relationship life, we have a present circumstance to accept and deal with in our work life.
Just as we develop a healthy attitude toward our relationship history - one that will help us learn and move forward - we can develop a healthy attitude toward our work history.
I have worked many jobs in my life, since I was eleven years old. Just as I have learned many things about myself through my relationships, I have learned many lessons through my work. Often, these lessons run parallel to the lessons I'm learning in other areas of my life.
I have worked at jobs I hated but was temporarily dependent on. I have gotten stuck in jobs because I was afraid to strike out on my own and find my next set of circumstances.
I have been in some jobs to develop skills. Sometimes, I didn't realize I was developing those skills until later on when they become an important part of the career of my choice.
I have worked at jobs where I felt victimized, where I gave and gave and received nothing in return. I have been in relationships where I manufactured similar feelings.
I have worked at some jobs that have taught me what I absolutely didn't want; others sparked in me an idea of what I really did want and deserve in my career.
Some of my jobs have helped me develop character; others have helped me fine tune skills. They have all been a place to practice recovery behaviors.
Just as I have had to deal with my feelings and messages about myself in relationships, I have had to deal with my feelings and messages about myself, and what I believed I deserved at work.
I have been through two major career changes in my life. I learned that neither career was a mistake and no job was wasted time. I have learned something from each job, and my work history has helped create who I am.
I learned something else: there was a Plan, and I was being led. The more I trusted my instincts, what I wanted, and what felt right, the more I felt that I was being led.
The more I refused to lose my soul to a job and worked at it because I wanted to and not for the paycheck, the less victimized I felt by any career, even those jobs that paid a meager salary. The more I set goals and took responsibility for achieving the career I wanted, the more I could decide whether a particular job fit into that scheme of things. I could understand why I was working at a particular job and how that was going to benefit me.
There are times I have even panicked at work and about where I was in my employment history. Panic never helped. Trust and working my program did.
There were times I looked around and wondered why I was where I was. There were times people thought I should be someplace different. But when I looked into myself and at God, I knew I was in the right place, for the moment.
There were times I have had to quit a job and walk away in order to be true to myself. Sometimes, that was frightening. Sometimes, I felt like a failure. But I learned this: If I was working my program and true to myself, I never had to fear where I was being led.
There have been times I couldn't survive on the small amount of money I was receiving. Instead of bringing that issue to a particular employer and making it his or her fault, I have had to learn to bring the issue to my Higher Power and myself. I've learned I'm responsible for setting my boundaries and establishing what I believe I deserve. I've also learned God, not a particular employer, is my source of guidance.
I've learned that I'm not stuck or trapped in a job no more than I am in a relationship. I have choices. I may not be able to see them clearly right now, but I do have choices. I've learned that if I really want to take care of myself in a particular way on a job, I will do that. And if I really want to be victimized by a job, I will allow that to happen too.
I am responsible for my choices, and I have choices.
Above all else, I've learned to accept and trust my present circumstances at work. That does not mean to submit; it does not mean to forego boundaries. It means to trust, accept, then take care of myself the best I'm able to on any given day.
God, help me bring my recovery behaviors to my career affairs.
Just as we have relationship histories, most of us have work histories.
Just as we have a present circumstance to accept and deal with in our relationship life, we have a present circumstance to accept and deal with in our work life.
Just as we develop a healthy attitude toward our relationship history - one that will help us learn and move forward - we can develop a healthy attitude toward our work history.
I have worked many jobs in my life, since I was eleven years old. Just as I have learned many things about myself through my relationships, I have learned many lessons through my work. Often, these lessons run parallel to the lessons I'm learning in other areas of my life.
I have worked at jobs I hated but was temporarily dependent on. I have gotten stuck in jobs because I was afraid to strike out on my own and find my next set of circumstances.
I have been in some jobs to develop skills. Sometimes, I didn't realize I was developing those skills until later on when they become an important part of the career of my choice.
I have worked at jobs where I felt victimized, where I gave and gave and received nothing in return. I have been in relationships where I manufactured similar feelings.
I have worked at some jobs that have taught me what I absolutely didn't want; others sparked in me an idea of what I really did want and deserve in my career.
Some of my jobs have helped me develop character; others have helped me fine tune skills. They have all been a place to practice recovery behaviors.
Just as I have had to deal with my feelings and messages about myself in relationships, I have had to deal with my feelings and messages about myself, and what I believed I deserved at work.
I have been through two major career changes in my life. I learned that neither career was a mistake and no job was wasted time. I have learned something from each job, and my work history has helped create who I am.
I learned something else: there was a Plan, and I was being led. The more I trusted my instincts, what I wanted, and what felt right, the more I felt that I was being led.
The more I refused to lose my soul to a job and worked at it because I wanted to and not for the paycheck, the less victimized I felt by any career, even those jobs that paid a meager salary. The more I set goals and took responsibility for achieving the career I wanted, the more I could decide whether a particular job fit into that scheme of things. I could understand why I was working at a particular job and how that was going to benefit me.
There are times I have even panicked at work and about where I was in my employment history. Panic never helped. Trust and working my program did.
There were times I looked around and wondered why I was where I was. There were times people thought I should be someplace different. But when I looked into myself and at God, I knew I was in the right place, for the moment.
There were times I have had to quit a job and walk away in order to be true to myself. Sometimes, that was frightening. Sometimes, I felt like a failure. But I learned this: If I was working my program and true to myself, I never had to fear where I was being led.
There have been times I couldn't survive on the small amount of money I was receiving. Instead of bringing that issue to a particular employer and making it his or her fault, I have had to learn to bring the issue to my Higher Power and myself. I've learned I'm responsible for setting my boundaries and establishing what I believe I deserve. I've also learned God, not a particular employer, is my source of guidance.
I've learned that I'm not stuck or trapped in a job no more than I am in a relationship. I have choices. I may not be able to see them clearly right now, but I do have choices. I've learned that if I really want to take care of myself in a particular way on a job, I will do that. And if I really want to be victimized by a job, I will allow that to happen too.
I am responsible for my choices, and I have choices.
Above all else, I've learned to accept and trust my present circumstances at work. That does not mean to submit; it does not mean to forego boundaries. It means to trust, accept, then take care of myself the best I'm able to on any given day.
God, help me bring my recovery behaviors to my career affairs.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie
©1990, Hazelden Foundation
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If you go around thinking you are being cheated,
life becomes very unpleasant.
--Felix Salten
Sometimes we feel cheated that we have been given this darn disease to cope with. Why us? Why can't we just be like normal people? Why did we have to get into so much trouble and pain as a result of a disease that hit us and skipped over other people?
Another way to look at it is: Hey, I'm really lucky. I have a killer disease, and I'm beating the odds. I'm getting healthier every day. I got my life back.
Another way to look at it is: At least this is a disease I can recover from.
The Big Book Promises (on pages 83 and 84) say that any feeling of self-pity will disappear by the time we are working Step Nine. We may even be grateful for the path that led us to recovery. Do we believe it? There's one way to find out: We need to try it.
Prayer for the Day
Higher Power, help me to remember that there are a lot worse things in life than being in recovery.
Today's Action
What are five good things that I have gotten from recovery? Ten? I will write these down and refer to them when I'm tempted to feel sorry for myself.
You are reading from the book:
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